In the light of the moon (cw)

Seeing her again could probably have been the worst thing to happen to him. As soon as he had left them, he had just gone out to seek trouble, just like he had after their confrontation. All the last couple of weeks work had proven useless, and he felt too ashamed of it to call for Calista again. God knows, she had done everything she could and succeeded. So discarding her hard work in a fleeting moment? Not gonna happen. He wanted to solve this, at least get some closure so he would stop feeling so empty. He sat in the windowframe, leaned back against the wall in the darkness, the moon rising behind him, casting a dim shiny light over him as he rotated the flower in his hand. He had picked off the leaves and held onto the stalk, looking at the barren insides of something that was once covered by beautiful petals. He threw it onto the surface he was sitting on, looking at it as he waited. Waiting was horrible, but it didnt matter as his feelings were acting up even worse than before.
He turned his eyes up to the moon, looking at it's beautiful light as he just sat there in the silence and the dark.

Dinah had not wanted to come back to the girls dorms, but she had to eventually. She opened her door, sniffling as she felt more tears fall down her cheeks. She looked up, seeing the petals and the flowers in her room. Her eyes fell on him sitting in the moonlight and she looked away, before she noticed how he had plucked a flower of it’s petals. She closed the door behind her. ”Flowers are more pretty with their petals on,” she said, whiping away her trails of tears. She felt so empty and walked over to drop her wet shoes on the bathroom floor, taking off her wet clothes and getting into her pyjamas. She came back into the room, wrapping a towel around her hair and sat down on her bed, looking out into the room with a empty stare. She layed down on the bed and looked up at the ceiling. ”I told him everything,” she said, her voice weak and broken from crying.

"Maybe I like them ugly now," he said in a low tone, not moving his eyes away from the moon. The flower being ugly felt like a reflection of himself, and he didnt mind it. He moved his eyes down to the stalk again as she left for the bathroom. He picked it up in his hand and looked at the naked flower before he squished it's head with his thumb, feeling the juices wet his finger. He let the flower fall, watching it bounce off the frame and land on the floor. He looked out the window as she got back and leaned his head against the frame again as he closed his eyes for a bit. He felt oddly calm, but it was more a numbed calm than anything else. Her words made him scoff. "Good. He should know everything about you so he can accept you for who you are," he then said in a tone drained of all emotions. He turned his head to her for a second, but could only look for her in that second before he had to look away.
"I didnt think you'd get over me that quickly. Guess that shows how much I truly messed up," he said as he looked at the broken flower surrounded by the petals. It wasnt really to make her feel guilty as it was a statement from what he had seen. He moved his eyes back out the window and looked to the trees in the distance. "I am tired of this. Tired of hurting," he then said as he felt a frown creep up on his eyebrows. "I just want to make this easier for the both of us," he said, not really sure were he was going at, his mind was screaming at him to stop. He picked up a petal that had landed on the frame and squished that as well in his hand, as he then looked at her. "Does he make you happy?" he asked, clenching his fist hard around the petal before he let the wrinkly remains roll off his palm and onto the floor.

They were both miserable, but also caught up in their own pride. She looked at the ceiling, stretching her arms and closed her eyes as he spoke. Eaden was cold and she missed Jake’s warmth right now, but she couldn’t say that out loud. ”He won’t accept me,” she whispered, her voice breaking as she laid an arm over her eyes to try and stop herself from crying. He spoke again, but at this point she was so done with feeling things. She wanted it to stop. Why was she hurting him like this? Why was he hurting her like this? She felt guilty. So guilty that she hadn’t taken the time to just listen to him, but to be honest he had never really listened to her like that either. His question took her aback, but she leaned up on her elbows and looked at her brother. He was so beautiful in the moonlight, the pale light dancing over his tanned skin. ”He does,” she said. She never had lied and she wasn’t going to start now. ”But I don’t feel like he can fill up the hole you left behind,” she admitted. Dinah kept her eyes on her brother as she sat up and took out the towel from her hair, drying it silently. ”Why did you lie?” she asked. She needed to know.

He frowned at her whisper and shook his head, but he didnt look at her. "You clearly still doubt the way you find a way into people's hearts," he stated and made a sad smile.
"You can let him try," he said, but it was clear that it wasnt meant as if it couldnt. The thing that hurt him the most about his own words were that he said them as encouragement. He had thought back when he told Calista that he could let Dinah be with someone else, that it was just a comfort to himself, a way to shield his feelings. But it seemed like it had become the truth, and the feeling was worse than the hole he felt in his chest. He sighed deeply. He looked away and back on the moon, as she asked her question. He closed his eyes a bit and then exhaled. "Father always scolded me for chasing after you. Telling me it was wrong, telling me that I had to stop. He never struck me, but I think that would have been easier, than being confined to the house, getting to watch you go around with the other kids in the village," he started as he moved his eyes around the moon, thinking back at the memory he was speaking of. "As I sat up there, I felt like I stopped loving you, because my feelings for you meant that I was kept inside, no kids to talk to, no friends to have, and you were out there laughing, running around, enjoying friendships and games," he then explained as he placed his hand on his lap to let it rest there.
"When you were taken, I didnt want to be stuck around our father, but it wasnt very nice to be around you either. I wanted to get back at you both, father for his scoldings and you for confining me. I knew he would look for you but I lied and told you he never cared, and I thought... Seeing you cry from those lies would be satisfying," he paused for a bit as he scratched his cheek, sighing deeply. "But it wasnt. I just felt worse. The scoldings started to seem like a distant memory and the feelings crept back, like they had never left," he looked around at the stars and gulped. "In the end, I realized that I only kept the lies going because I feared that you would go look for him if I told you the truth. You would leave me and I'd feel like I was back to being stuck," he closed his eyes for a bit before he exhaled. "Had I known that this would await me, I wouldnt have. But things are as they are now, I cant change them," he felt a sour taste in his mouth and clenched his teeth for a bit. "So go ahead, keep being pissed at me and find comfort in the young werewolf," he then said his voice feeling a little weaker as it tore right at his heart to say. "I wanted to hurt you for all those years. But now I just want you to be happy," he turned his eyes back to her and had a sad expression on his face. He looked at her for a bit before he shrugged and turned his eyes back to the moon. "That's all I want,"

Dinah didn’t like the way her brother was speaking right now, but he seemed to have gotten some sort of control over himself. She felt her gaze just fall upon him as he spoke, biting her lip at the mention of their childhood. It seemed like such a long time ago. Hearing him finally open up about all of this hurt her as much as it made her understand. She looked down as he spoke about getting revenge on her, not that it was a strange thing for her to imagine. That had been why she had kissed Jake so hard while Eaden looked. His weak voice made her swallow as she got to her feet and walked over to him. She just stood beside him, arranging the petals into a new flower shape, picking the stem up from the floor. ”It’s hard being angry at the very thing you love in this life,” she said, as she kept fiddling with the petals. Where was she even going with this? She knew that they belong together, she had always known that, so being without him was such an empty feeling in her chest.

”I’m scared, because I’ve fallen for that young werewolf,” she said looking at Eaden, her eyes glimmering in the moonlight. She wanted to press him close and tell him that she only loved him, but that was a lie. Her heart worked in strange ways. She reached out and took his hand. Feeling his hand warmed her so much, and while she was still angry with him, she couldn’t stay like that. ”I wish I could only seek comfort in him, but I can’t live with my brother and love hurting like this,” she whispered. Dinah had always been a giver of love, maybe that was why people took her in so quickly. Why Kyle had seemed to grow fond of her, how Amaryllis and Karmena had accepted her right away. She gave his hand a squeeze, not willing to let him go. ”But I seem to hurt everyone I come into contact with,” she whispered. ”I love you, Eaden. Always have and nothing can change that,” she said, almost as a plea. She had longed to say those words, but she didn’t know if she could forgive him just yet.

”We’ve both acted out of our norms, and it has scared me to my core,” she said, looking out at the moon before she looked down at the flowers. She wished she knew what to tell him, but maybe she could just try and talk. ”I want to hear you say that you don’t want me if I’m to move on,” she whispered. She didn’t want him to give up on her, no she wanted him to take her in his arms and pull her close. She wanted to let both of them cry and feel the hurt they had put each other through.

Dinah gritted her teeth as he said it was what the world wanted, and her want to burn it all down had come back. Who cared about that stupid world? It was always getting in her way of feeling and being who she truly was. It had never given her comfort, not once had she felt at home here. She couldn’t speak as he removed his hand, feeling the rejection to her core being and she leaned against the widowframe to keep herself from collapsing. His comforting hand felt more like a slap to it, because it felt like it was burning. She could feel him hurting because she was hurting as well. It was hard enough to have Jake ask her to make a choice, but even harder when she didn’t even get to choose when she spoke with Eaden. Had he not learned that confining her got him nowhere? She took a minute to gather herself, keeping quiet and listening to his words, she kept her back to him, shaking as she felt the loneliness in her bones. She turned to him, looking at him and trying to breathe properly. ”Eaden, I am not me without you,” she said shaking her head. Why did she sound so cliché? She wanted it to sound like something that noone had ever said before. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she tried to focus.

”People always speak of this unbreakable bond between siblings, but it’s a lie,” she said walking closer and stood closer to him, not too close, giving him the distance if he needd it. She looked at him with gentle eyes. ”But I think it is breakable, because you did break our bond with your lie, you broke me and tore out the large piece of you that resided in my heart,” she said. She didn’t want to cry. She had no more tears she wanted to shed over this. ”I can barely feel my fingers right now; they feel so cold and all I ever longed for was a soft touch and loving words,” she said looking into his familiar grey green eyes. ”I can’t go back to the way things were, but I am willing to build something new,” she said holding out her hand to him, hoping he would take it. ”I don’t want to put a claim on anyone anymore, I want to just feel love and feel it in my soul – I want to try and figure things out with our father and figure out what happened to our mother,” she said with begging eyes. ”And I want you by my side for the rest of my life, if you don’t want me as your lover, then at least as your sister,” she said.

She wasnt her without him and he wasnt him without her. He didnt say it, but he didnt have to, it was just the way it was. He watched her walk closer and frowned a bit as she was removing the distance he was trying so hard to keep. Her words were hurtful but he knew them to be true, even if he didnt want it to be. He looked at her hand as she spoke of it and sighed deeply. He lifted his gaze to hers and frowned a bit at her words, then to look at her hand. Why was she giving him another chance? Couldnt she just for once not pull him in like this and draw him closer?

Something just clicked in him. Maybe it was the thing about claim or the fact that it was followed by her wanting him by her side. His eyes filled with a shining anger as he pushed himself up to his full height. "You want to feel love? My love? Yet without a claim?" his voice was bitter and he stepped a bit closer to her, keeping his stern eyes on her. "Do you really think you could do that? Be my lover and watch me go off with someone else without hurting again?" he narrowed his eyes as he could hardly believe it himself. He gritted his teeth as he stepped closer to her again, slowly removing the distance between them. "Are you saying you wouldnt lay a claim on me the moment you see me with another girl? How you wouldnt imagine if I had fucked her? If I had kissed her or made her sing like I used to make you do?" he had raised his voice ever so slightly, but it soon turned down to normal, yet still angry. "I told you, I am tired of this. Hurting, feeling fuck-all because I fucked up," he closed his eyes for a bit as he took a deep breath. He opened them and stepped closer, so he was only a short distance away from her. "If I were to be your lover again, I would only be your lover. No one elses. My heart and body only for you," he finally said it, in a low tone, but his eyes got sad as this was what he was trying to avoid, yet it had been pushed out of him in his anger.

Maybe he couldn’t understand or wouldn’t, but she had seen the pain she had put him in, because he saw himself locked to her. He was an incubus, a race known for it’s beauty and many lovers, how could she deny that? She had tried pushing it aside, but this was her trying to reach some sort of middleground with him. She loved him dearly, and what he said was true. She would be hurt like nothing in this world, her mind already racing with the different scenarios. The angel shook her head and looked to him. ”I would give my all for you Eaden, because that’s what love is for us,” she said. She was hurting badly, but the fact that he was slowly moving closer made her body relax more. Her body wanted to throw itself at him, make both of them disappear in moans and pleasure, but that was how they used to solve things. No. From now on they spoke together, got to an agreement. He said he was tired and so was she. Her body felt broken apart, tried to be reassembled only to be broken down again. He was so close now, so close that she could smell his faint lavender scent that always seemed to lure her in. His words about only being hers made her look down. He had promised that before, broken that promise. ”I don’t want you to promise me anything, because that means there’s a chance that promise can be broken,” she whispered in a weak voice. He hadn’t taken her hand and she let it fall to her side.

”I used to think that our life together could fix everything,” she said taking a deep breath. She looked up at him, and now that he was so close that she could touch him if she wanted, it felt like her body was hurting and being healed at the same time. ”I want your love, your heart and your body, but I don’t want to restrict you, because clearly I can’t just wrap up the feelings I have towards Jake,” she said. It was the sad truth. She had never expected to fall for someone else but her brother, and maybe it was better if she went and were with Jake. However with Jake came the problem of him being from the future. She couldn’t imagine herself getting left behind and wait for him to return in her future. Even if she loved him, she couldn’t see it working out in their favor. Jake was warm and comforting, a love that she had needed to mend her broken heart, but as today had showed maybe love wasn’t enough. You needed to understand the person you were with, compliment the other and make them feel whole. Jake didn’t fill the Eaden shaped hole in her heart. He had instead been placed beside Eaden and planted his roots.

”You’ve broken so many promises by now, but it seems so have I,” she said. She wasn’t without flaws in this mess, far from it actually. But she also knew that with Eaden by her side they could work through anything, as they always had. It would take time to heal the wounds that they both had from this. She watched him carefully before she spoke again. She had sensed the anger in him, but she knew it was because he was frustrated. ”When you break a bone and as the broken part heals it becomes the strongest part in it,” she said and took the last step forward to be only a foot away. Her grey green eyes searching him. Wounds didn’t heal in an instant, and it would take time before they would feel like they could open up to each other again. She took his hand, but didn’t entangle their fingers. ”If we manage to heal from this, then we can’t break like this in the future,” she whispered. She missed being innocent right now. Missed just feeling like holding hands was enough, but it would have to be enough for now.

"But you also want him," he said, his eyes a bit sad at the thought, but he knew he just had to get over it if he was going to be with her.
"It's not as much a promise as it is a fact," he said in a rather serious tone, in a way he hadnt used before. He shifted between her eyes and sighed. She may not believe it now, but he had gotten the sour taste of only having his needs satisfied when they were at their worst, and it had taken any joy that he may have felt from the relief away. He had realized that none of it meant anything if he couldnt have her, so why would he try and get her back if he was only going to hurt her again? No. Never again would he hurt her like that. He listened to her and frowned, "You can be with Jake. You could be with anyone, if that's what makes you happy," he paused and exhaled, "I know what I want, and no need could ever take it away from me if I got it," he then finished. Thinking about her being with someone else was so excruciating, but he truly meant it. He would have to let go of his possessiveness, but he would try his best if she wanted it.
He knew he had broken a lot of promises, and that she had broken one too. But he honestly didnt really care about any of that, wasnt it her that spoke of a new beginning? He felt his jaw twitch slightly and closed his eyes for a bit. "Not if you have the ability to fix bones," he then said as he looked at her. He understood the metaphor, but it was a silly one to use with his ability. He looked down at their hands and then back up to her eyes. "How many times do I have to say that I just want you to be happy?" he said in a low tone, still a tad sour and frustrated as he then lifted his other hand and placed it gently around her neck. He gave her a small yet tender kiss on her lips, before he quickly moved away. But feeling her lips against his like that again, made the hurt go away bit by bit and he quickly felt a need to kiss her again. Instead of following his desire, he let go of her neck and leaned back to stand straight. "I should go," he then said as he let go of her hand, the kiss was a big mistake on his behalf, yet he felt like he had needed it so bad.

When had all of this sprung into his mind? All of a sudden he would share her, but it didn’t sound right in her head. She wanted them both, that she couldn’t deny, because Jake had shown her a different kind of love. It was gentle and sweet. But on the other hand she saw a different side of Eaden right now and the feelings for him had never subsided. ”I promised to give Jake time to think, it’s a lot to take in for him and I think his fear would be that I would always choose you over him,” she said. Maybe Jake was right in all of this. Maybe she couldn’t love them equally, but how could he expect her to? Eaden and her had a history together and a bond that drew them to be with one another. However negating what Jake made her feel wouldn’t be right. Jake had one half of her heart and Eaden the other, so whe didn’t know if she would ever feel complete without either. Eaden spoke about what he wanted, and she knew he wanted her. She wanted him, longed for a day where they could feel good about the hardships they went through together. However she couldn’t be selfish in this; if Jake wanted nothing to do with her and in turn her brother, then he would have to call it off. Dinah sighed at his comment about bones and shook her head. Partly she wanted to push him teasingly, but she was afraid it was going to come across as her pushing him away.

”You’ll probably have to say it for eternity,” she said and looked into his eyes. Feeling his hand on her neck made tingles run over the skin where he touched her. Could he feel the pain she was in as well? Could he sense what she desired mostly? Then she felt his lips and a rush of relief went through her body, and as he broke the kiss she sighed at what had just happened. She wasn’t completely ready yet and she could feel that. He said he wanted to go and she looked down, a bit frustrated with the whole situation. ”Can you stay?” she whispered. She had gotten so used to sleeping alone with her nightmares, but she didn’t want nightmares anymore. She wanted a taste of sweet dreams that were to come. ”Fully clothed, cuddling, nothing else,” she whispered, clarifying she wasn’t ready to let him in so close again, but she needed him. He had always been there to scare her nightmares away, even in Hell. ”I can be big spoon?” she said with a faint smile, having picked up on some lingo from Amaryllis helped her blend into this world a bit more.  

"Well, would you?" he asked, not really himself knowing what the answer would be anymore. A month ago before this shit show went down, he would have never doubted her loyalty, but maybe that was the problem in all of it. She had devoted herself to him while he had only promised her his lips and heart. He didnt want that anymore, not if they were truly to be together - He had lost her to his lie but set the nails in the coffin with his broken promises. He wanted to break the coffin and throw the broken promises as far away as he could. "Then I guess I will," he said, but he knew he would. The kiss was bittersweet in it's sense because it didnt really help more than it made him long for another. He watched her look down as he had said he should go, her whisper asking him to stay. He closed his eyes for a bit and thought about it. Was this really a good idea? He wasnt sure he was ready to be that close to her, with or without clothes. His being yearning for her closeness, but that was out of selfish needs. He looked at her and raised his eyebrows a bit at her new lingo. He blinked a few times, his face clearly conflicted, before he without clarifying his answer just went over to the bed and laid down, taking off his jacket and letting it fall to the floor. He sighed deeply at her scent and placed an arm over his eyes, before he turned around so she could be the big spoon.
If she laid down next to him and made them spoon, he'd gasp at their closeness and close his eyes as he felt a few tears escaping his closed eyes, yet his whole body was calm, showing no sign that he was crying. He grabbed her hands around his chest and pulled her closer as he held onto her arms, sighing deeply. "I can stay with you for the night, but I have to be gone by morning," he said in a low tone, caressing her skin carefully with his thumb, touching her felt like such a pain, but a good one of a sort.

”I honestly don’t know anymore,” she said as she looked at him. She shook her head, as it was all just one big mess in her brain. Images flashing of Jake and how hurt he had looked today, images of Eaden and how hurt he was looking. Clearly no love was easy for a Morningstar, and even if Dinah had another last name, it didn’t change her heritage. She knew asking him to stay might not be the optimal solution in all of this, but how could she deny herself the fact that she longed to be close to him? Even if it tore her heart to pieces she wanted nothing more than for him to stay. She watched him move over to the bed, removing his jacket and laying down. Watching him react like he did made her realize that it would have been her if they were in his room. She walked over, laying down and pushing herself closer to him. Her arm wrapped around him, and she burried her face in his short hair. Breathing in his scent made her body relax and she could feel herself close to crying again. She had missed him close like this, missed how their bodies reacted to each other, and maybe that was why she had kept her distance. Eaden had broken her, Jake had healed her, but it would take Eaden to bring her back to normal.

”I understand,” she whispered into his hair, feeling his thumb caressing her skin made her feel so contorted. Dinah loved Eaden far deeper than she had realized at first. Without him she was just the Sun running along a lonely sky, but with Eaden she knew she had the company of the Moon. One could not live without the other, she understood that now, and in turn she could understand why Eaden had tried keeping such a grip on her. ”It’s Saturday tomorrow, so I think I’ll seek out father,” she said. She needed to know some things that only Baal knew. She needed to know what had happened to her mother, and if what she had experienced in hell was true. ”You can tag along - if you want?” she suggested. Maybe being around other’s would help, as them alone together could end up in old habits.

Laying there with Dinah seemed to make him a little distressed, yet he wasnt planning on moving or rejecting her, he simply couldnt - That hadnt changed. He opened his eyes as she spoke and felt how the tears had trailed down onto the pillow, making small wet spots that felt so cold on his cheek. He exhaled deeply and looked into the wall, blinking a few of his tears away as he nodded. The thought of her being on good terms with their father again soon just made him feel so angry in a way, not a way that was showing at the moment, but he knew that tantrums and insecurity would strike him eventually. He could only hope for her not to be around him when it happened.
Her suggestion made him sigh as he removed a hand from her arm and dried his cheeks, but making it look like he was scratching his eye. "I'll show up," he said, as he still meant it when he said he would be gone by morning. He turned around and placed his arm above her shoulder as he placed his hand around her back, holding her a bit closer. "Is it supposed to feel this way?" he asked in a tired tone as he stared up at the ceiling, frowning a bit as he couldnt quite understand how this both hurt and yet felt so soothing.

Dinah had half expected him to get angry at the mention of their father, but she needed to hear things from all sides. Eaden could hate their father all he wanted, but Dinah was not good at hating others. She never had been. Maybe it was because she was gentle of nature, being an angel, but she felt it was more part of who she was than that. He promised to show up and she nodded silently. He moved around and she rested her head on his chest, feeling him press her closer. She was so conflicted, because she was so happy with being close to him, yet the things he had done still hurt her in some way. His touch was calming her, yet it was also making her angry. She sighed at his question, not really knowing what to say. ”Like hurting and mending?” she whispered and shrugged with her free shoulder as she closed her eyes. His scent always had a calming effect on her. ”I don’t know, but it gives me a piece of feeling whole again,” she whispered, moving her hand up to rest beside her head, feeling his heart beat. Dinah was at a loss for words, feeling so torn in her feelings, but she still knew that love was the strongest feeling in her system. ”I’ve missed you,” she murmured finally drifting in to sleep. Sleeping finally felt right, at least the nightmares were subsiding a bit.

As the sun shone into her room she turned over in her empty bed and sighed, hugging the duvet with the smell of Eaden close to her face. How could she already miss him? Yesterday seemed like one big mess in her head and she sat up, still hugging the duvet close to her nose. She closed her eyes and laid back on the bed again, breathing in the left over scent. Why did it have to hurt so much? She thought of Jake again and her body shivered at the thought of what he might be thinking right now. Dinah shook her thoughts out of her head and got dressed in a simple outfit pulling her head back in a pony tail and weaing black sneakers. She didn’t even bother looking at herself in the mirror before walking out to the hallway. She didn’t feel hungry, so she decided just to head to Southside where she knew her father was staying.

The walk wasn’t too bad, more than anything she felt her nervousness rise in her body. Was she going to get scolded by her father? Did he even have the right to scold her at this point? She had so many questions and she didn’t even know if she could remember half of them. She walked up the stairs, getting to the apartment door and stood a bit idle. She didn’t know if she had the courage to even knock, but she did, reaching out and knocking on the door with shaking hands.

"I guess," he murmured in a low tone, looking at the ceiling with his eyes slowly moving around like the answer would be up there hiding under the paint. He sighed deeply and wanted to turn his head to hers, breathe in her scent in her beautiful hair like he had done a million times over. His head was slowly moving by instinct, trying to fall into his old mannerisms, yet he stopped himself as he realized, turning his head back to watch the ceiling. He looked down at her hand and moved his arm around her as he caressed her in calm movements, yet his head seemed like it wouldnt let him get much sleep tonight. "I've missed you too," he said in almost a whisper as he then swallowed, feeling that if he said it any louder, he'd crumble and fall apart. He just let his eyes bounce around the ceiling as he thought of everything that had happened. When the birds sang right as the first light of morning was starting to sneak up in the horizon, he carefully got out of bed, feeling more tired than he did when he came here. He looked at her as he picked up his jacket and felt a need to kiss her, but he just couldnt. He clecned his hand around his jacket as he then left the room, knowing that at least she had slept well.

Baal was sitting on the couch, his nose buried down into a book about demon pregnancies. Not that he hadnt experienced one of such before, he just always dove into this kind of stuff to put his mind off his worries. He was wearing reading glasses, and it wasnt that he really needed them, his eyes were perfectly fine - Yet wearing them made him feel like the words looked a little clearer. He lifted his head as he heard a knock and got up from the couch, frowning a bit in confusion before he looked to the bedroom. He walked over and took a quick moment to watch Buffy that was still sleeping, looking cute as ever. He closed the door to the bedroom carefully before he moved over to the front door and opened it. He raised his eyebrows as he saw his daughter and took off his glasses, folding them and attaching them around the neck of his shirt. "Goodmorning. It's a bit early to by up by now on a saturday, isnt it?" he asked in a careful tone as he opened the door for her to step in, glancing back at the closed bedroom before he looked at her. "Are you hungry?" he asked, this time a little more natural and not as careful.

Dinah stepped into the apartment, not really sure what to answer and shrugged. Maybe it was early for some, but she usually started her days earlier anyways. She could see he kept glancing to the bedroom and she felt a rush of guilt move through her. She needed to repent for what she had said to her father and most of all his wife-to-be. ”I don’t really have an appetite,” she answered with a weak voice. Partly she wanted to break down crying, telling everything that was bothering her, and explain her actions. But she needed to take things slow. Move at a pace they could both follow. ”I, uhm, came here to just talk,” she said. Maybe it was a broad term, but she knew that it would explain things the best. ”I can just come back when she’s awake,” she said, nodding at the closed bedroom door. Maybe her father had taken her threats very near his heart, and she wouldn’t blame him.

There was sound coming from the bedroom and Buffy stepped out, looking a bit confused, and she shrugged off the pain she felt in her body. ”Hi dear,” she said in a careful tone. She didn’t want to anger the angel. Dinah nodded as a greeting and looked down. Buffy placed a hand on her belly. It was showing slightly, but she hid it well with one of Baal’s t-shirts on. Buffy took a sharp inhale, frowning as she felt the pain in her body again, but quickly pulled up in a smile and walked over to Baal. She placed a soft kiss on his cheek. ”I think the tea from yesterday made it better,” she said with a smile. The last couple of days she had been in so much pain she could barely move. It was weird how things moved in waves. She had somehow managed to turn in her assignments as well, which was an even bigger mystery. Then she turned her face to Dinah, tilting her head to the side with a warm smile on her lips. ”I have no hard feelings towards you, Dinah – and if your father starts acting up just let me know,” she said with a sweet smirk before she moved out into the kitchen. ”Oh! And feel at home!” she yelled as she started brewing some tea.

Dinah felt relief and looked to Baal as Buffy left for the kitchen. ”She seems nice,” she mumbled, trying to force a smile. The angel took a deep breath and moved into the livingroom. ”Eaden said he might show up, so …” she said, just wanting to warn his father of intruders. She stood idle for a bit. Where did she begin? ”Did you search for me?” she asked in a serious tone. She wanted to hear it from him. Having heard it from the demon fragment in hell hadn’t really persuaded her yet.

He wasnt really looking back at the bedroom out of worry of Dinah's presence, but more the worry of how Buffy had been affected by the pregnancy in the last few weeks. He hadnt really known how to deal with it, but tried his best to be at Buffy's side and make her days a little easier with doing chores and whatever Buffy wanted him to. He nodded as she said she wasnt hungry and closed the door behind her, it was hard for him to not just wrap his arms around her and hold her close, despite the things she had said and all that had happened, she was still his little girl and nothing could change that. He shook his head as she said she could come back. "It's fine, you can stay all you want," he assured her with a warm tone as he smiled slightly.
He turned his head as he heard shuffling in the bedroom and smiled softly at Buffy as she stepped out. He looked at her stomach and frowned slightly in a worry. He couldnt know what was going on in her body, but it sure was worrying him a lot. He smiled at her kiss and placed a hand on her lower back,"Good. Then at least it's better than the other things that seem to make you so nauseous," he said with a crooked smile, not really telling her that he had gotten a hold of something that seemed like a liquefied soul and given that to her. He watched her walk to the kitchen and then looked back at Dinah, "She is. She reminds me of your mother in some ways, but different," he then said, scratching his neck a bit as he wasnt sure mentioning her mother was the best idea, but at least he said something positive. It wasnt that he had anything bad to say about their mother, because he hadnt.
He narrowed his eyes slightly as she said Eaden could show up and nodded a bit. He walked into the livingroom, standing a bit before he walked over to the coffee table and moved a few things around. He turned his eyes back to her at her question and sighed deeply. "Yes. For many years, I looked everywhere. For you, your brother and your mother," he then said as he gestured to the couch. "In the end I had to give up, because it seemed like you were gone. Looking for you in other dimensions would be complicated," he then said as he sat down himself and leaned a bit back. He looked at her and sighed deeply. "I understand that Eaden has told you otherwise. And I dont blame him for doing so. I was harsh on him all his life, and I feel like I deserve his hatred," he rubbed his mouth with his palm, just thinking back made him feel a bit shameful. "I wasnt a good father to him," he made a slight sad smile before he looked at her again. "But I am happy to see you both," he then said before he placed a hand on her shoulder. "I am not angry at you in any way. You acted on your beliefs and I cant do anything else than respect you for it. Even if it was a bit hurtful," he then said as his smile got a bit warmer.

Dinah knew they had said she was welcome, and it wasn’t like she didn’t feel welcome, it was more that she felt out of place. At the mention of her mother her eyes flickered slightly as she felt the numb feeling that had followed the death of her. ”Mother had blue eyes,” she just said and moved to the livingroom. She didn’t want to see Buffy as some sort of replacement, but she wasn’t angry at her father for moving on. It had been so long since her death and Dinah still felt like she could show up at any moment. She took a deep breath and listened to her father speak. She sat down as he gestured to the couch, looking at him with calm eyes. He explained, but it was like she still had a hard time shaking off the lie she had always been told. She had to change her thoughtpattern that had worked for the last thousands of years. He turned to speak about Eaden and she felt her throat tighten. She knew he had never approved of Eaden’s feelings towards her, but did he know that she had always returned those feelings for her brother? Seeing him like this made it hard for her to believe. She had always imagined her father cold and without love, as he had never looked for her, but seeing him and hearing him, she knew he had looked for her. She knew that Eaden’s lie had been the biggest lie she had ever heard. She looked at the hand that he placed on her shoulder and she felt her body tremble at the emotion it made her feel. Dinah had missed her father, more than she actually had realized.

”I know why you were hard on Eaden, but I just wish the two of you could at least try and see eye to eye,” she said in a weak voice. She knew she was in no place to make a demand, far from it, but she wanted them all to turn over a new leaf. ”I want us to be a family; not like it’s in fairy tales, but at least just people we can go to,” she said and looked at her father’s eyes. She could hear Buffy move around in the kitchen, but it sounded more home-y than anything else she had heard for a long time. The way the hybrid mumbled to herself and seemed to speak to what Dinah pressumed to be her stomach, made a smile creep on her lips. ”I want to be a good sister to both Eaden and …” she said furrowing her brows. She guessed it was too early for them to know the gender of the child, let alone think of a name. ”And the sibling that awaits,” she said with a smile. Looking at her father she could see so many things of herself in him, but Eaden had gotten his good looks. Dinah looked more like a strange mixture of her father and her mother.

”I’m probably going to regret this, but I need to know,” she said with a more serious tone. She straightened her back and took a deep breath. ”What are your thoughts about Eaden and me?” she asked in a low voice. She was nervous. Affraid her father would yell at her and say that what they did was dispicable.

"She had the most beautiful of them too," he added with a sad smile. He had no idea what had happened to their mom, a trail of blood seemed to have set his mind on what had happened at the time, but he couldnt find her soul in neither heaven or hell. So if she had truly died or was still alive was unknown. Sitting on the couch with his daughter felt like something he had dreamed of for a long time, so it actually happening made him feel a bit giddy. He squeezed her shoulder softly as he listened to her words, nodding as he could understand what she meant. It probably hadnt been fun to watch them go head to head about everything, he did feel bad for being so rough with Eaden. It would probably take a while for them both to find some middle ground. "I know what you mean. I want the same," he agreed with her. He smiled a bit at Buffy's noises from the kitchen and looked at Dinah. His brows twitched shortly at her words, but it was a happy one, he was very happy with hearing her wanting to be a good sister. He let her finish before he nodded. "You've always had such a kind heart," he said with a smile.
Her serious tone made his smile fade slightly as he listened to her, raising his eyebrows a bit at the question that awaited him. He leaned back into the couch, keeping his hand on her shoulder as he thought about it. He then leaned back up as he let go of her shoulder to wrap his arms around her. "I cant say that I am happy about it. Or that I can approve, as it was the whole reason I kept him away from you," he started as he pulled her into his embrace, running his hand down her back before he leaned back to look at her face. He placed a hand on her shoulder and smiled softly. "But who cares what your old man thinks? Your bond was strong, that was what Boadicea saw. And I cant pressume to control such things, nor break a bond like that," he then said as he glanced towards the kitchen, the words old man was clearly not something he was used to say at all. "So as long as it makes you happy. I'll let it stay that way," he moved a bit of hair from her face and placed it behind her ear. "But as you know, this world doesnt approve of it. I do hope you have been discreet about it," he then said as he looked into her eyes with a worry. He didnt want his kids to feel like outcasts in this world, so he was hoping it wasnt so.

Even though her father meant well, it felt like a jab to hear soul when he said she had a kind heart. Did she though? She felt so frustrated with it all and the fact that people around her were hurting were just to show that maybe she wasn’t as kind as she had thought at first. It didn’t suprise her that he didn’t really approve, it made sense. She let him embrace her and just leaned her head against his shoulder and listened to him. Just being in his arms made her feel like a little kid againg and she looked at him as he pulled out of the embrace. She hadn’t been able to hug him back, but just rested in his arms. His mention of old man made her furrow her brows a bit, as it didn’t really sound like something he would use. Her lower lip quivered as he said that all he wanted was for her to be happy and she looked down. She knew she was happy with Eaden, because he completed her like no-one else in this world. Living without Eaden would not be living at all. ”I haven’t been with him these past weeks, and honestly it haven’t felt like I was alive,” she said with a shaky voice. She swallowed and closed her eyes.

”I met another guy, and he seemed to heal me, but I feel so lost,” she said shaking her head. She needed some sort of guidance. How could she know what was right? Her breath was shaky. ”He’s part of those future kids, that I know you’ve come close to at one point,” she said, not really in the mood to go over the things that had happened and what she had heard. Dinah felt her tears press on her eyes, but she tried blinking them away. ”Is it possible to love two people and not have your heart be split in two?” she asked feeling the conflict in herself ravage her like a storm. Buffy came in from the kitchen, placing a cup of tea in front of Dinah and sat down in one of the cozy chairs. ”The heart can love everything and anything at one time,” Buffy said with an encouraging smile. Dinah shook her head and looked to the hybrid. ”But what if it hurts them? Do I truly love them if I can keep hurting them like this?” she pleaded before she turned her head to her father. Buffy looked to Baal as well, watching how he would deal with this.

"You did leave before he could explain himself. Might be that you feel that way because there was so much left unsaid?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. Even though, he had a feeling that it couldnt just be words left unsaid. Their bond, from what he knew from Buffy was stronger than most, so it wouldnt be weird for them both to feel as if something was suddenly missing. "Does it still feel like you're not alive?" he then asked, just to know if she still felt that way. He raised his eyebrows as she saaid she had met a new guy. He frowned a bit as she mentioned the future kids and exhaled deeply. "Yes. I have met them," he said in a rather shameful undertone as he looked away for a bit. He hadnt talked to Karmena or any of them since he sent her and Lion to hell, and he knew that they probably all hated him for it. Not that he blamed them. "I fell in love with one of them, actually," he said, feeling a bit weird as he didnt really talk about it that much. "But in the end, I had to remind myself that they were going to leave. It wouldnt have worked out," he added as he looked back at Dinah to then make a worried expression. Who had she fallen in love with he wondered?
Baal's eyes widened a bit as they both seemed to focus on him for his input. He had been quiet listening to them both. He exhaled deeply and bit his lip as he moved his body to lean back into the couch, keeping his arm around Dinah as he wasnt quite ready to let her go. "Love is... complicated. You can love many or none," he said as he scratched his cheek a bit. "The heart is free to love whoever it want to love. It's out of your control... But," he turned his eyes to Dinah, "There's a difference in loving someone and devoting yourself to them. Devotion is to focus on the love you hold for the person you've chosen to be with," he said as he then looked out into the room again. "I was devoted to your mother, loved her with all my heart. I dont think I'd ever stop loving her, because she made me feel whole. Losing her was like losing the artifact," he then said as he lifted a hand to his chest and clutched his hand to a fist. He exhaled. "But even if I still love your mother, I have chosen to be with Boadicea with the love I feel for her, I've chosen that I want to spend the rest of my life with her," he said as he turned his eyes to Buffy, smiling faintly. "She took the hole that your mother left and filled it with a new different love that I never thought I would experience," he then said as he finished his sentence he looked back at Dinah. He looked at Dinah and caressed her back. "Yet me finding a new love, doesnt mean that you have to believe that the new love you find would be the one you have to be with. You dont have to be with any of them if it doesnt make you feel whole," he shifted between her eyes, "However, a time will come, and when you do feel ready to choose, choose the one that you feel would complete you," he said, his smile growing a bit as he lifted his hand from her back and ran his fingers down her cheek. "Choose only when your heart feels ready to choose,"

Dinah knew she had left before Eaden had time to explain himself, but she hadn’t been ready to hear it. She wouldn’t have been able to react of do anything if he had explained, but they had spoken last night. Baal couldn’t know that, but she felt there was at least a bit of relief in that thought. His question made her sigh and place a hand over her heart that was beating like a hard drum behind her ribcage. ”I don’t know, so I guess it’s better than feeling dead,” she said breathing out. ”Right now I feel like I’m being torn apart,” she said, feeling a bit ashamed. At the mention of her father falling in love with one of the she looked at him a bit surprised but nodded at his words. It was like he could read her worries and it made her feel a little relieved. She knew that nothing good could come with messing with someone from the future, knowing they would have to leave, and what it would do to her. However she just couldn’t stop her heart from having fallen in love with Jake. She leaned back with him, resting her head against his shoulder as he spoke and looked up at him. Sitting like this she probably looked like a little kid, but she felt like it. Hearing him talk about her mother made her nervous in a way, and she looked to Buffy who just sat there smiling. How could she be alright with him loving someone else like that? Dinah looked back to her father as he continued speaking. Her father had been able to fill the hole left behind by their mother, but the way he explained it didn’t feel like it applied to how it felt with Jake. ”I know I’ll have to choose, but the longer I wait, the more I hurt – and I’m scared because what happens if I choose wrongly?” she said with a worried expression.

Buffy was calm, or as calm as she could be with the pain that still seemed to rummage her body. She took a sip of her tea as she looked at Baal interacting with her daughter. Maybe she shouldn’t be part of this, but she didn’t really have the energy to go anywhere. She closed her eyes and grimaced as another shot of pain moved through her, but she opened her eyes once more looking at Baal. It was weird what kind of pain you could endure when you knew what it would mean. She liked seeing Baal as a father, and mending the bond with his daughter and son might be the thing he needed to become ready to start this family over. Buffy would never stand in the way of his kids, unless they were acting out. Buffy felt so young being in this room. It was weird to think of the many lifetimes that Baal had, but in a way that just made her adore him even more. He was strong, a value she looked on as fantastic. ”I know I might not have a lot of experience, but what your father says is true – but you need to remember that if they love you back, they would be willing to wait until the end of time for you,” she said with a smile. Sure, you might fall out of love, but the bond that people had to their special someone was always stronger. She had seen how Eaden had been affected after Dinah left for hell, a pain she could mirror when it came to Baal.

Dinah felt at a loss still. Her father’s words were so calming to her and she knew that both him and Buffy were right, but it didn’t take away the insecurity. Maybe it was naive to hope for a simple solution. No solution in life was simple. ”All I know is that I can’t live without Eaden,” she said looking down. She knew that what they had was not accepted by people around them. This world was not easy on a love like theirs. ”We haven’t really wandered around with signs around our necks, but I have told Jake about it,” she said swallowing. She couldn’t lie to that werewolf, she just had to pour her heart out and tell him everything. She was quite surprised by the fact that he hadn’t run away in disgust, but it had showed her a glimpse of the hardship of the world. ”I even made Eaden promise to keep it a secret at the academy,” she said looking to Baal with hurt in her eyes. ”But, I hate hiding – you two can go down the street, hand in hand and nobody bats an eye,” she said, her lower lips shaking again as she felt her tears so close to the surface again. ”All I want is to be able to do that with the one I love,” she whispered.

"It's a passing feeling, yekiratì," (My dear), he said, smiling warmly at her as he truly believed it wouldnt be like this for her always. Yet he felt a bit worried, as much as he knew it wasnt going to last, he didnt want her to feel this way right now. "You'll have to find yourself again before you tear your mind up about your brother," he said as he tilted his head slightly.
He smiled a bit at her worry and shook his head, "This is why we dont live in fairy tales. Sometimes we choose wrong, but that dosent matter. It will hurt and make you feel empty, but you learn from mistakes like that. And if it was the wrong choice the right one will be waiting for you around the corner," he assured her as he then looked at Buffy as she confirmed his words. God he loved her so much, and hearing her speak of love in that way just seemed to warm his soul.
"Then dont live without him. Take the time you need and then mend the broken bond. I'm not saying you have to love him like you used to. Or even love him at all if you dont want to," he then said, not really knowing how she truly felt about Eaden in this moment. But something in him believed that it was him she was refering to when she said she loved two. He raised his eyebrows in surprise as she named Jake as the one she loved. Last time he saw him, the boy was merely 12. "It's good that you told him. If he is to love you, he has to know every aspect," he said, not knowing that Eaden had already said this to her.
"There will always be someone batting an eye. If I dont wear something that covers my arms or chest properly, people will look at me and then look at Boadicea with these looks that screams; Why are you with a guy that looks like that? Why arent you with someone that looks a bit more.. normal?" he smiled at her and shook his head to show how silly he found it. He pressed her closer and rested his chin on top of her head as his hand caressed her cheek. "People see true love and they envy it. They envy it to the point where it's better to spray judgement, make it so the people they envy will get shy of showing their love so publicly for everyone to see," he made a slight frown and lifted his head away to look down at his daughter. "We just have to remember that love is stronger than whatever thoughts strangers may have of it," he said, couldnt really believe that he was saying this, since it were his kids that the world were judging. Yet he felt protective, even if he or the world didnt approve.