One last try - James (TW + CW)

Nate had waited for it all morning. He had been planning, making sure he had everything he needed to pull it off. It was just past noon now. The 23-year-old werewolf was standing by the window in the hotel room, looking out over the city. The sky was grey, cloudy and generelly gloomy - perfect for what was about to go down. On the bed was a big filled with things he would had to get here. He would not be able to get it past the custom at the airport. He flinged as he moved away. His knee was still hurting after he had been shot in it. He had managed to get himself healed, but since the two bullets in his shoulder and the bite was the worst, he decided to get that worked out first. The bite was still not healed, but not quite as bad as when it first happened. It had been a few days since his brother had left him at the cemetery to die. He was done playing nice. He knew better than to go to Kenna at the moment. She would probably be surrounded by the circle the siren had talked about. But Spencer was fair play. Nate had something in store for him as well. He looked over at the nightstand, where a needle and some liquid laid. Spencer would probably love this. He picked up the phone, he had managed to get unlocked without Spencer's fingerprint. He went into a text conversation with the boy who seemed to be worried about his younger brother.

[Spencer: Hey. I'm at The Castillo, room 107 on the third floor. We need to talk]

That should do it. He moved to the bed and sat down next to the bag. All he could do now was wait.

The days had been pure torture. It felt like someone had ripped his heart out and no matter what he did, he could not for the love of it, find Spencer or even get in contact with him. He felt it was his own fault, for pushing him to tell him all about his messed up pass, but he had also felt, that they left on a good note, but then again.. he also knew now, that Spencer was actually pretty good, at looking like nothing was wrong, as the first time they met. He had gotten drunk, almost stoned and out to a point he had never even tried before. His hair was a mess, and his skin was more pale than normally, and his eyebrow was also not healed from a party he had not too long ago. He felt like shit and had acted like one too, all because he felt like Spencer wouldnt see him or even tell it to him as it was, that he was not wanted in the boys life anymore.

- Flashback -

The Text Messages

[ Hey, would you like to come over again later tonight? ]

[ So what are my favorit person up to? ]

(MISSED CALL)

[ Mr Popular, whats happening?, why are you not answering? ]

(MISSED CALL)

[ Spencer?.. are you okay ]

[ Please answer me.. please ]

7 (MISSED CALLS)

[ It has been days now, please answer me.. is it because i said that i´m falling for you.. ]

[ I will give up everything for you, please.. dont.. dont leave me ]

[ Spencer i.. please.. ]

(MISSED CALLS...

[ Okay fine.. i will disappear from your life.. ]

He came home from a long night out in town, before falling almost into his bed, only to hear it go off not long after. He took his phone almost to quickly, only to see a message, that felt like it just crushed him even further. He looked at it, before just standing up, walking over to his closet, He didnt really have anything after taking everything out of the closet and then throwing it around. He looked down himself, still in a custom made tailored full silk ody suit. He walked over to get a robe, before putting on some black slippers, not even giving a fuck at this point. His hair got messed a little back with his hand, but it wasnt as polished as normally. He walked out the door, before ordering a taxi to the hotel. He stopped when he looked up at the stairs, remembering the ball for a short moment, before walking up and then inside. He looked around for a little, before he got into the elevator and then finally stood in front of the door. He could feel his whole body instantly getting tense and how he just placed his hand against the door, without knocking. He didnt know if he should knock or just go.. shortly he said softly. " Spencer.. ". His voice almost making a crack in it, as he stood there, with his chest almost bare.. trying to keep it together.

Nate was pretty damn tired of those texts. He had turned the phone of most of the time, not interested in watching the tragedy playing out in front of him. But it was also good he hadn’t texted back - now he was more likely to come running. He had tracked him down first; seen what race he was to better prepare. He had holy objects, holy water and vervain laced chains in the back. Even though he was pretty strong, he had no chance against a vampire, not without help. He smelled the vampire the moment he came into the hotel. He was fast. And desperate. Just as he had experienced. He heard his pathetic voice from outside the door, rolling his eyes. He then stood up and walked to the door. He ripped the door open and looked at the excuse of a vampire. ”Sorry. You’ll have to settle for me. Spencer just went down to get something he had prepared for you. I’m a friend of his. Come in.” He moved aside so James could enter. If he wouldn’t, he had asked some of the wolves from his pack to come. They were stationed out around the hotel to make sure the vampire couldn’t easily get away. Nate went to the bed and sat down next to the bag again. He had left the door open. ”He’ll be here any second. He wanted you to be comfortable. I’ll leave when he get’s back.” He was smiling surprisingly genuine.

Nate knew his brother well enough to know he would come in a second. Even if he didn’t give a shit about the vampire, he would come. Just to stop him from hurting anyone else. But he had a feeling Spencer did care, which just made it much sweeter to him. He could punish him a little, all the while getting what he wanted. It was really just a big circle to him. He lured Spencer here and took him with him to get Kenna there. It was so easy to use people who cared too much. ”Spencer told me about you. A little at least. You know how private he is. He’s kinda crazy about you. He has a good reason for staying away. I shouldn’t tell you, but someone closed to him passed away, a close friend of his. He didn’t take it very well and cut everyone out. Even me. Until yesterday when he said he wanted to do anything to get you back. When he told me who you were, I had to help. He’s been a fan of you forever.” Nate didn’t know anything about their relationship, other than what he could read from the texts, and of course he knew what a fan Spencer had been of James when he was younger.

As he stood in front of the door, he caught a weird smell, werewolf.. but why?. He looked a little at the door, before parting his lips ever so slightly, as if he wanted to say something to Spencer through the door, but what met his eyes, was something he was not prepared for at all. James looked rather pissed when the door went up and it was another mans eyes he looked into and not Spencer´s. He didnt know if this 'person' was really his friend or not. He couldnt help but look at him a little more than normally, when he walked inside to the room.. like there was something.. similar?. He tilted his head a little to the side, before saying with a rather cold tone to his voice. " So he just went down.. then why didnt i run into him ". He looked with a suspicious gaze at the guy. There was just something about him, that just didnt sit right.

He walked over to the bed, sat down and then looked at him a little, listening to his story. He couldnt believe it, why wouldnt he had called him or come to him?, but then again.. he hadnt seen anything to him at all for a while, was it really just because of that. " I dont buy it. That does not sound like him ". He looked challenging at the man before him, before he tried to call the phone again, but as discreed as he could in his pocket, half up and half down in it. He looked slightly at it, before saying. " I havent heard anything about him being friends with a filthy werewolf. So what´s your name ". He wasnt here to play. He felt played and hurt, so of course he was not gonna buy any bullshit from nobody. This was properly Spencer´s new love interest.. maybe they guy just said all those things to be sweet.. but then it hit him. Werewolf scent.. looking like he could be in family with Spencer.. been a fan of him forever. " How do you know.. ". He was starting to seriously doubt this man, but then again.. he wasnt showing any signs of actually leaving or trying to prepare for something, because he didnt know, he didnt even know how fucked up Spencer´s brother was, so of course he didnt do anything. " Are you dating him.. ". He held his questions very short but still in a cold tone of voice, almost demanding an answer right away.

He looked a little around the room, hoping that the phone would ring or anything.. something that could confirm his thoughts of this being a set up. It didnt make sense.. Spencer wouldnt pick up anything for him, why should he.. and what should he?. He leaned back a little, feeling the effects still from the night before. He looking at the door for a short moment, feeling how his body tensed up slowly, like he was getting ready to burst out, but then again.. he wasnt as strong as normally, with all the drugs and the bloodloss and yes.. well everything, that he had tried to drown his sorrows from feeling unwanted and stupid for even saying the words to begin with. * So he wants me back.. but we were never.. together.. but this.. maybe *. He felt like a mess and looked like one, even in the expensive clothing.

Nate could see he was not satisfied that it wasn’t Spencer opening the door. He did everything to stay in the role of supporting friend and didn’t react to it. ”I don’t know. He just said he was going to be right back and to let you in if you came.” He didn’t know if his acting was going to work, but no matter what, he was going to give it his best. He couldn’t say he had much experience behaving like this. He usually just took what he wanted. He was going to be an alpha after all. He might as well get used to it.

Nate looked at him with a smile when he came in. ”Look I get it. You meet this guy and he’s fun and charming. But he’s also a mess. He’s done this before. Sometimes he just disappears. It’s nothing personal, it’s how he deals. It sucks, but it’s something you have to deal with if you want him in your life.” He didn’t notice James picking up his phone. ”Wow man, no need to be rude. I’m Matt. I was part of his family’s pack before I moved her a few years ago.” He stood up and walked to the desk. He leaned against and table. He had put the phone on silence, so it wouldn’t bother him. ”He told me.” He scoffed when he was asked if they were dating. ”No. I’m not into men. He’s just a friend.”

He could feel how James was hesitant to believe him. He should just go on and get it over with instead of playing games. He walked to the door and closed it and then locked it. He took forward a bottle and poured some holy water over the handle. ”Fuck it. No need in trying to convince you anymore.” He walked to the bag. ”I’m not called Matt. My name’s Nate.” He rummaged through the bag until he found a small cross blessed by a priest. He walked closer to the vampire. ”Get in the chair. I need to make you look pretty for my brother.” He was not messing around. ”Don’t bother running. You won’t get very far.” If the cross didn’t work, he had plenty of other ideas. He was just getting started. When he said ‘pretty’ he actually meant hurt. He wanted to make it look good, like he might kill James if Spencer didn’t come to his aid.

He still quite didnt take the bate, not yet at least. There was just something so wrong about all of this. Why a hotel, why not home at Spencer´s place or his maybe?.. and it just became more of a shitshow when the man mentioned the pack. " So did you know.. what a fucked up family he have ". When the phone didnt go off, he started to relax a little but it felt like ages for Spencer to come. " Look, i´m just gonna go and fucking get him ". He didnt wanna talk with this Matt guy, no.. he wanted to look at Spencer, hold him.. just feel his skin against his. He stood up before going forward to the door, but stopped when the man said that he didnt need to try and convince him anymore. He looked at him with a puzzled expression, trying to piece the words together, before he heard the mans talk. When he said that his name was Nate.. he could feel the anger rise up inside of him. This.. this couldnt be his brother, could it?.

He heard his words, before looking at him, seeing how he approached him with a cross. He laughed when he looked at the boy, before slowly reaching for his hand and the cross. " Do you REALLY think such a fucking little thing, could EVER do something to me ". His eyes suddenly turned to the familiar ruby red color, before he could feel the pain in his back. " I have just WAITED to get some alone time with you, so i could rip your fucking foul body from itself! ". Some red looking tentacles slowly started to appear from under the robe, but they didnt get very far, before he fell to his knees, feeling the effect of the bloodloss, and how his body suddenly turned for the worse.

The tentacles retracted inside of him, before he tried to force them out, until he just dropped it, and then quickly almost ran to Nate, but his body was to slow, to much blood was lost in that process from before, and even before that.. he hadnt really been drinking as he should. He could feel his stomach turn, as he fell forward right in front of Nate. His eyes almost got dark, before he closed them only to open them minutes after, feeling like it had been hours. He felt so human, so vulnerable, so pathetic. This wasnt like him at all. He looked at Nate, as he had regained some strength to keep himself awake. " I swear to you right this fucking moment, if you as much as FUCKING TOUCH HIM, you will find yourself always on the run!.. and when i get you, when i fucking get you in a state where i´m not so drained.. then i´m gonna make your life a fucking living hell! ".

Nate narrowed his eyes when the vampire spoke of his family. He didn’t say anything, knowing he would blow cover if he did. When the vamp was going for the door, he knew he had to tell the truth anything. ”Don’t talk shit about my family.” He bit his teeth together when James didn’t care about the cross. He had other things he could use. This was not doing anything to him. ”Yeah well get in line.” He stepped back when he saw the tentacles grow from within the robe. When he fell to his knees and the tentacles moved away again. He had apparently gotten the vampire at the right time. He was a fucking mess. How sad to be so weak you can’t carry out your threats. ”I won’t do anything to him, as long he does what I want. Whatever you might think, I do care about him. I just want him back where he belongs. You on the other hand, you don’t matter to me.” He went over to the bag and picked up the chains, swinging them over his shoulder. ”Come on big guy,” he said and picked him up and sat him in the chair, binding the chains around him and the chair to keep him in place. He picked up Spencer’s phone and turned on the camera to record a little movie. ”Hey there little brother,” he said, standing behind James. ”Give us a little smile for Spencer,” he urged James. ”I’ll wait an hour. If you’re not here by then, I’m going to have some fun with your boyfriend.” He sent the video to Spencer’s messenger account.

Spencer's outfit without the sunglasses.

Spencer was just sitting at home. He was seriously thinking about finding James. He just hadn’t been in a right place of mind lately, and he didn’t want to be with James unless he was happy. It was stupid, since Spencer had shared so much of himself with James and he hadn’t run away. He sat in the couch and leaned his head backwards. He picked up his phone when a chime sounded. A message from himself. What the fuck? He quickly opened it. He froze when he saw the video. The blood dropped from his face, his stomach turning. He had to go there, quickly. He walked around frantically looking for everything he needed. He gathered it all and went outside in a rush. He ran to a parking lot not far away and jumped into the car he had been given not that long ago. He looked at himself in the back-view mirror. He looked scared out of his mind, which was exactly how he felt. He took in a deep breath and used his ability to find Nate. A trail appeared on the ground and he started driving, following it.

When he gained consious again, he could feel his skin almost burn, like somthing was melting it, like acid almost, and then the pure stench hit him, almost like bat to his head. He looked confused for a second, before trying to move himself, but his body was to weak, and his state was slowly decreasing, since he hadnt drinken any blood in some time. He felt the hunger, almost consume him, sitting there in extreme pain, clenching his pearly white teeth together, trying to stay at least a little sane, and not just go crazy from the hunger in his stomach. He looked with the ruby red eyes at the man going away from him, before taking the phone and then turning it to them both. He looked at him with fury, before saying " Stay the HELL away from here. I dont want to fucking see you ". He knew that if he begged or seemed even slightly like he wasnt okay with it, that Spencer properly would come.. or maybe he wouldnt?.. why did this man have his phone?. He could instantly recognise it, from the time he had held it in his very own hands, typing his own number into it, while smiling inside.. from the first time he had met Spencer.

James looked at the camera, before saying with a low voice, while looking down. " Fucking let him. Spencer dont come ". He looked up, in pain but also exausted from trying to move, feeling the pain from the chains even more. " Fuck you. Like hell you even care about him. If you really did, you wouldnt have treated him like fucking shit, and you would have helped him.. ". He had heard the story from Spencer´s own lips, still remembering it so clearly, how he had cried before him and in his arms, how he always doubted himself, no shit that he did.. when he had such a fucked up family, that didnt care for him at all. He started laughing, before looking at Nate. " You are pathetic ". He wouldnt stop laughing at him, just trying to piss him off. He didnt know that Spencer was on his way.. he hoped so much, that he wasnt on his way to get him.. he would rather die at the hands of Nate, because of his own stupidity.. than to see Spencer hurt because of him.

Nate was surprised how easy it was. He knew Spencer would come. He cared too much not to. He scoffed when James claimed he didn’t want to see Spencer. Never had a lie been less convincing. He might be a good actor, but having seen those texts he sent Spencer, he knew it was not true. He walked in front of James looking at him, that was only polite wasn’t it? ”You don’t know what you’re talking about.” He narrowed his eyes when he started laughing, calling him pathetic. He went over to the bag and picked up a wooden stake. ”You think you have the advantage here? You think you can piss me off and I’ll make a mistake? Gotta disappoint you there. I have been planning this for a week. From where I stand, the two you will have two options; one is Spencer stopping this ridiculous vacation and comes back with me. Or the two of you will die here together. Such a tragedy it would be.”

Spencer knew James wanted him to stay away. He would have said the same if their places had been switched. He was not going to listen. He just made one quick stop before he drove to the hotel. He had a bag with him. He was not going to let Nate get away with anything this time. He ran up the stairs following the trail to the room. ”Open the fucking door!” He hammered on the door until it was opened. He pushed past Nate and looked at James, his eyes first showing sadness for seeing James like that. ”Don’t touch him,” Nate ordered. Spencer dropped the bag on the floor, his expression changed into anger. He opened the bag and pulled forward a gun, pointing it at Nate. ”You stay the fuck back!” Nate moved back, his hands raised. ”Look at the balls on you,” he said, almost sounding proud. Spencer moved to James. ”Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” He was clearly worried about him. He was not even trying to hide it. ”How sweet. Spencer looked back at his so-called brother. ”Shut the fuck up,” he said, before looking back at James and loosened the chains on him. He was not going let this go any further. He had not just brought the gun to threaten his brother, he was planning on using it. He was over all the shit he put him through. It didn’t just hurt him anymore. It hurt everyone in his life. He was just done. He looked at James, letting his hand embrace his cheek. ”It’ll be over soon.” He leaned forward to give James a short kiss, almost as if he was saying goodbye. He might be, depending of how it was going to go. He turned to Nate. ”What do you want? I’ll give it to you. Just leave them alone, just leave them all alone. Kenna, James, Nathaniel. Just forget about them and I’ll do everything you want.”

James looked at Nate with fury in his eyes, like he could devour him any time. " If you take him, i will follow you, i will find you and when i do, I WILL FUCKINGKILL YOU ". he was pissed, no more than pissed. He didnt even care for the stake right now. He could feel the anger inside, like never before.. taking over, devouring him. James let his body slowly try again, but no powers.. nothing came and nothing would, he had reach his limit.

He looked at the door with wide eyes, surprised to hear Spencer's voice. A little twitch showed at his full lips, before turning into a smile. He felt almost like crying, that was how much he had missed him, how much he had wanted to hear him, see him.. smell him.. taste him, but not like this.. not now, not ever. " NOOO GO! ". His voice was almost cracking. He didnt want Spencer to come. The voice had been deep and pleading, before he muttered through his clench teeth. " please.. go ". He looked down, feeling a tear of blood travel from his face.. feeling so weak, but also ashamed.. ashamed that he didnt see it coming, that he put Spencer in this situation. He heard the door get open, but he couldnt get himself to look up at Spencer.. it was all his fault. He heard Spencer saying something and then he looked up, to see Nate go back, almost complimenting Spencer for holding the gun. He looked at him with shame and sadness, when he asked him if he was okay. " i.. " he couldnt say anything more.. it was like the words were stuck in his throat..

He felt the chains slowly get off him.. before he felt the hand on his cheek, how warm it was.. so loving and so like finally being home, finally being where he was suppose to be.. before taking in the kiss, only for a drop to travel down once more. " Spencer dont... ". He looked up at Nate, before slowly rising. He let his hand gently rest on Spencers shoulder, before his fangs came forward. " Let me drink from you.. ". If he could just get enough from Spencer.. just enough to use his powers.

Nate didn’t doubt James. Just like he didn’t doubt Spencer would do the same for James. ”Heard that before, still here.” He looked at James when Spencer’s voice appeared outside. He looked happy, and then told him to go. He couldn’t say he understood that. Why not try and save both? But maybe he was just too self-involved to ever want to sacrifice himself for anyone.

Spencer was not going to go. No matter how much James asked him to. He would never be able to live with himself if he did. He looked at him with a sad smile. If he had just found him sooner, maybe they could have avoided this. He tasted the bloodied tear between their lips. ”I got you some,” he went to the bag and pulled forward a blood bag. It was maybe not the same as the fresh stuff, but he just thought it was better. That they would both need their strength right now. He gave it to James before turning to Nate again. ”I wish I could agree to your conditions. I can leave James and the siren alone. Can’t let Kenna go.” Spencer was tensing up just by hearing him say her name. ”Don’t you fucking dare say her name.” He moved closer, pointing the gun directly at his chest. ”Pull the trigger,” Nate said calmly. Spencer looked at him, hesitating just a second. It was enough. Nate took advantage of it, forcing the gun out of Spencer’s hand and point it at his head.

”Over there,” he said, nodding towards the other side of the room. Spencer backed over there. Nate followed him. ”I was so hoping you would make it easier this time. Guess not.” He used the gun to punch Spencer to the floor. He tossed the gun on the bed before taking the syringe from the nightstand. ”You probably should have died from the last overdose. Let’s see if this one takes.” He jammed it into Spencer’s neck, releasing the drug into Spencer’s system. He picked up his bag and looked at James. ”Now you have a choice. You can follow me and kill me, or you can stay here or make sure he doesn’t die. Can’t way to see what you do.” He walked towards the door.

James could suddenly smell the blood, as the bag got open again, and a blood bag got handed to him. It was much safer for the both of them, that it was done in this way. He could feel the hunger ripping and tearing his insides, screaming for the sweetness of blood, how it wanted to devour each and everyone in the room, if it could, if he would have let himself, but he didnt. He cared for Spencer, but one person he did not.. was Nate. He bit down rather hard but also in an almost animalistic way into the blood bag, tearing it to pieces in his mouth, before swallowing every last one drop he could get to. He closed his eyes for a moment, feeling his body getting instantly better, but not nearly enough for him, to even come near what he had been at one point. He looked at Spencer with his blood red eyes, how they was filled with an almost primitive glanze in them, as if he could jump him at anytime.

He quickly turned his gaze, when Nate mentioned someone named Kenna, before he saw Spencer almost snap with just the mention of it. He felt his stomach turn. He didnt know anyone named or called Kenna, hadnt heard about her.. was she someone new, but then again.. he had said that he was gay, so that couldnt be possible?. He tilted his head a little, trying to both follow their conversation but also stay ready. He rose to his feet almost instantly, when the gun ended in Nate´s hand, before he was ready to jump him, but he stopped, as he didnt want to see Spencer dead in Nate´s arms. * He couldnt kill him.. could he *. He followed Nate and Spencer with his eyes, but when Nate hit Spencer, he tensed up, showed his fangs, before a low growl could be heard. His pupils turning bigger, his hair standing on edge at his neck, his fingers separating, and his back slowly starting to move something inside of him.

He could feel it, he had only one chance to make this.. only one and then he would be to weak, maybe even to weak to do anything for some weeks. He knew it was risky, he knew that it could also fail and that would maybe be the end of them. When Nate drugged Spencer, he couldnt hold back anymore. He moved slow, but enough, before he waited patiently.. the words hit him hard.. revenge or love. He stood for a moment, before he mumbled. " Why not BOTH ". A large red tentacle appeared ever so suddenly from under his robe, before sliding through the air, forming into an arm´s size round thing, with a point at the end, like a big needle. It pierced right through Nate´s delicate skin, right at the heart, only he couldt really be sure it hit perfectly, as he was weakened, in pain but also distracted very much by the thoughts of Spencer and what to do.

He looked at Nate, making sure that the tentacle had gone almost through, if it hadnt already gotten all the way, before pulling it out of him. When it pierced him, it wasnt as big as an arm, but more like four fingers hold together. A deadly blow.. that was what he hoped for. He fell to his knees, before looking over at Spencer, reaching out for Spencer, feeling him under his hand. " Spencer, please.. what should i do!? ". He didnt know if he should call an ambulance or what he should do. He found his phone, before calling the number. " It´s an emergency, yes please.. i´m at the Castillo. Drug overdose ". He didnt know if Spencer was going to need an ambulance, but he wasnt taking the risk.

Spencer didn’t speak of Kenna much. She had her own story, and he was afraid he was going to tell it if he first got started speaking of her. She was like a sister to Spencer, although it had seemed like she would become his sister-in-law for a while. Until she left Nate and came here a few months ago. Spencer followed, and now Nate was here to. Spencer felt guilty for bringing Nate into Kenna’s life again. She had moved on, gotten a boyfriend, was going to start a family. Until Nate came and ruined that. Kenna had lost her baby, and Spencer felt like it was his fault. If he hadn’t come, none of it would have happened. But then again, a lot of great things had happened to him here. He didn’t regret that one bit. He just regretted bringing Nate with him - even if it wasn’t intentionally.

Spencer fell to the ground when he was hit by the gun, blood starting to slow near his hairline. He felt the puncture of his skin - an all to familiar feeling. He also knew the dose was most likely lethal. His suspicions were correct when he heard Nate’s dilemma. It didn’t seem to be a dilemma for James. He couldn’t see what happened, only hear it. Hear how Nate groaned in pain, the thumb when his body hit the floor. He felt the heat already, like he was having a fever. Then the chest pain, like someone was grabbing his heart and squeezing it tightly until it would explode in their hand. ”Fuck,” he whispered, knowing it was not good. It was worse than last time. He was afraid he was going to die. He looked at James when he came to him. ”Call for help,” he said just before his breathing turned into something similar to hyperventilating. He grabbed James’ hand. He was so scared he couldn’t possibly hide it even if he tried. His eyes moving all over the place.

It didn’t take long before the sirens could be heard outside the hotel. ”Come… with…” He could barely form a sentence, but he wanted James to come. He didn’t want to be alone. He didn’t know for sure what had happened with Nate, but he couldn’t focus on that right now. He hadn’t let go of James’ hand. The door was opened by hotel staff and the people from the ambulance entered. They looked at Nate first, one of them checking on him, calling for another ambulance to get him help. Spencer was placed on a gurney, his hand forced from James’. ”Come with us sweetheart,” one of the female staff told James before leaving with Spencer. Spencer looked down at Nate when they passed him. He didn’t know how to feel about the sight. He had very strong feelings towards the werewolf, but he was his brother, nonetheless. Spencer had grown up with him. If he died now, he knew his life would be easier, but at the same time he would feel like something was missing. They went outside the room and walked towards the elevator. One of them stayed behind to take care of Nate.

James looked frantically at Spencer, feeling like the whole world stopped. He didnt know if he should give him some of his blood, but he instantly bit himself in the wrist, before trying to find a moment that he could let Spencer get some of his blood. He finally found it and then gave Spencer some. If he died i front if him, could he be turned into a vampire.. what else could he hope for, not death.. never death. He squeezed Spencer´s hand, while trying to stay calm, but his whole body was shaking, as if he was having an anxiety attack of some sort. " It´s okay, i am right here.. i will not leave your side, never again ". He slowly took him into his embrace cradling him into his chest. He gad let the phone just run in his pocket, if they were going to say more, something. He didnt care for the blood around his mouth, or his red eyes glowing under the thick messy brown hair, poking to all sides almost, some of it hanging in front of his eyes a little. He looked at Spencer with a frightening expression, as if he was afraid of him dying in his arms. He didnt look back to see if Nate was okay. The red tentacle had slowly almost vaporised in the air, and he could feel the weakness take over, as he looked at Spencer, before hearing his words. He closed his eyes, leaning down over him, before saying with tears running down his face, squeezing his hand in his, holding it close to his heart. " Always.. ".

James looked over at them when the door got broken down. He had wriped the tears away as good as he could, so it looked more like a fight had been going on. He followed Spencer when they put him on a gurney, feeling Spencer´s hand slip out of his. He looked at him with wide eyes now, like that was it.. now he would die. He almost didnt hear the female staff. He hurriedly went with them, walking over Nate, before looking down at Nate for a moment, trying to make sure that he was dead, which he looked like, but one could never be too sure, with creatures and their healing abilities. He turned his attention quickly over to Spencer, hurried inside the elevator, before following them to the ambulance. He couldnt hold him in the hand, as they were already trying to make him ready for treatment, while they tested the syringe. He leaned forward, hiding his face in his hands, trying to thing of something else, but everything inside of him was turning, yelling at him.. blaiming him. * it´s your fault he is like this.. if you hadnt come.. if you had stayed away from him.. if he dies, its on your hands.. nobody should ever love you.. you dont deserve love.. stupid.. so stupid.. loveless creature.. die.. you should have died instead.. it should have been you on that gurney.. it should have been you on the floor... you you.. you..you...you *. He felt like he was going crazy.. until they stopped.

They hurried out of the ambulance and took Spencer to the intensice care unit. James wasnt allowed inside, but he stood outside waiting, hoping.. he couldnt fint the calmness inside, it was ripping him apart. He fell on his knees, trying to keep it together, but he couldnt. A flash suddenly interrupted his thought, before he looked up to a paparazzi. He hurried to his feet, before walking over to the man, that got held down by some workers at the hospital, taking the camera and deleting the picture.. after that, the police got to the place, to keep paparazzi at bay, but also to talk to them or James, when everything had calmed down. James looked through the window, trying to see what they did to Spencer.. trying to get a glimt of something.. a hope. * Please dont die on me.. *.

Spencer felt a little calmer knowing he wasn’t alone this time. Somebody who cared about him would be there when he woke up. If he woke up. He wasn’t sure what Nate had given him. If he had a chance to feel the high, he would have known. Luckily, he didn’t know the way an overdose showed itself depending on the drug. He felt how is body was working so hard to protect itself. He felt tears in his eyes from laying here so helpless, when all he wanted to do was calm James down and be with him after their time apart. He trembled in his arms. He didn’t know what was going to happen. He couldn’t tell if his heart beating faster because of the overdose or because he was scared out of his mind.

Spencer made a short sound of discomfort when they moved him. In the ambulance, they gave him something to calm his body down. It worked, but his mind was still racing. All he wanted to do was reach out for James, to hold him. Everything seemed so fast and hurried. He could barely keep up. He was moved into a room away from James. He didn’t want to be alone now. He was hooked up to a machine keeping track of his heartbeat, pulse and some other things. They also gave him an IV drop, keeping a close eye on him to make sure he was stabilizing. He was barely awake, his eyes only half-opened. But it was enough to see the woman in white moving closer to him. She seemed out of place. There was something about the way she moved, the way she almost seemed to float towards him. He knew she wasn’t living anymore. She didn’t seem to dangerous, so he didn’t react. Not that he was in any state to react. She moved even closer until she was by his side. She let a hand glide across his arm. He then felt the feeling he had only felt once before and hated. Like he was being forced away, locked away in his own body. He could see everything, but he would have no control over his body. His heartbeat slowed down, the color slowly began to disappear from his face, from his eyes. The machine flatlined, as his heartbeat was so slow and far in between, it would keep him alive, but not show up on the machine. The doctor engaged in CPR. Nothing happened. Spencer could see them; see how they were fighting to keep him alive. He knew that in a little while, he would come to live, except it wouldn’t be him. It would be the women who had taken over his body. He was screaming at them to hear him, to not give up. But they couldn’t hear him. A time of death was called, before the doctor went to talk with James.

”We have done everything we can. I’m afraid he didn’t make it.” He looked at James with a sad look in his eyes. I was always sad when patients died, even more when they were so young. ”You can go see him. If you have any questions, I will gladly answer them. A nurse will be able to contact me.” The doctor walked away and left James to say his goodbyes.

Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.. that was the only thing he could do right at the moment. He felt like sitting still was almost like admitting, that he could do nothing. He stopped as soon as someone got out of the door from where they held Spencer. His face got pale when he head the words. It was like seeing a movie, only in slowmotion, not hearing even a single word, only seeing the words form over the doctors mouth, and the expression, how it fell. James couldnt believe it, it wasnt true, it couldnt be true, he couldnt have. He dropped to his knees, starring blankly into the open hospital space, seeing the doors behind the doctor swing open and then close, how everything was just one big bobble around him with no sound. He felt like everything was sucked out of him. After some time, he rose to his feet, before almost running past the doctor, not hearing his words at all more.. the only thing he heard, was that he could go see him. * It was my fault..... i shouldnt have felt him... he died alone!... my fault.. it was my fault.. Spencer.. Spencer.. Spencer.. SPENCER!!! *. He felt like i was going mad, when he finally opened the doors, still glazed over in his vision, how everything was just foggy and almost out of focus.

He walked with heavy steps to Spencer´s side, feeling his heart being squeezed even more for each step, how it felt like he had feets made of lead almost.. sinking into the floor, slowly coming to a stop at Spencer´s side. He looked at him with wide eyes, not understand what had happened. He looked over at the heart monitor, before falling to his knees crying out, clenching his hands into the bed Spencer laid on, so it almost started to bend a little at the outer side of the metal. He looked up at him, before standing up, gently touching his cheek, moving down to kiss his lips, but stopping. He didnt deseve to touch him or kiss him. He could still feel the last kiss, their true goodbye kiss. Tears streamed down his face, before he looked at the heart monitor. He couldnt stop.. he wouldnt stop trying. He slowly positioned his hands, before starting to give him heart message. He wouldnt stop.. it could not happen.. " Plese come back to me.. please ".

" I cant live without you.. ". He was shaking so much, so he didnt even know if it even worked, and the only air he could give, was from his own breath, taking in and then quickly given til Spencer, after pumping.. but nothing. " Please! ". He stopped.. looked at him, before laying over him, sobbing.. like he had only done once.. when he had found his mother in their apartment in France. He couldnt lose Spencer.. not again.. not someone he loved so dearly. He felt his word shatter, as he still leaned over him, squeezing his hand, crying into his chest.

Spencer didn’t want to see him. He didn’t want to see him believe it, believe that he was dead. It would break his heart. He felt like he was pounding on invisible glass, unable to come through, to let everyone know he was still there. It made him crazy that he couldn’t move. He couldn’t move to look at the person whose steps he could hear, he couldn’t look into James’ eyes when he came to his side. He felt so goddamn helpless. Somehow his frustration created a reaction, a small one, but a reaction the same. A single tear rolled down the side of his head. He could see James when he moved closer to him, when he could feel his hand on his cheek. *James! I’m still here. James please hear me.* It was to no use, he knew that. But he had to do something, he had to try. He couldn’t stop fighting.

Spencer saw the tears on James’ cheeks and he just broke. He couldn’t believe this was happening, that he had put James through to it. He should have told him. If he had just told him, maybe James wouldn’t be so scared or sad now. Then he would know he wasn’t gone. He felt the pressure from his hand in a last attempt to get him back to life. He heard the words and he just kept trying to break through, to get control over his body before the spirit. He couldn’t let James go through it alone. He felt like he was sitting in a dark room, seeing everything through a tiny window, the only way of getting light, of seeing anything was through the window. He moved away from the window, sitting down in the farthest corner, his head on his bent knees. He began to sob. Of course, nobody would know it, it would not show in any way. It was his soul, his essence.

His cries almost went into sync with James’. He looked down at his hand. He could feel the squeeze so clearly. He put his hand into a fist. What the hell did it matter anyway. He would be locked up here for some time. He didn’t know how long it could take. He had only tried it once before. Then everything went dark. He knew what that meant. Time to wake up. Back at the hospital, a slow and nearly silent exhale exited Spencer’s body. The machine began beeping again, monitoring his heartbeat. It was not up to full speed and it wouldn’t be until he could get the control back.
A nurse came running into the room. ”Take a step back,” he told James, feeling for a pulse underneath Spencer’s cold skin. It was faint, but it was there. He quickly moved away to find what he needed to treat the overdose and calling for the doctor. He returned with another IV-drop and hooked Spencer up to it. Spencer’s gaze moved to James; he blinked a few times. It then moved around the room. ”Sir, can you hear me?” The nurse went closer to Spencer. ”Sir?” His voice was still his, but the tone was different, softer and more polite.

As he laid on him, he slowly turned his head to look at Spencer´s before noticing the tear. He quickly straightened in his back, before looking at him with a consued expression over the pretty face, that looked like it was laid in ruins by all the crying, filled with the already dried blood, he had before. Suddenly the machine beeped, he couldnt believe what he was hearing or seeing. He held his hands against Spencer´s cheeks, looking at him, waiting. " Spencer..? are you there ". He didnt know what to do, but before he could really start to thing about anything, his thoughts got cut by the sound of the door going up with a loud bang.. hitting the wall behind almost, before a nurse came rushing to Spencer´s side. He looked at her, like HELL he would move away from him this time. " NO ". His voice was clear, and if someone knew him, they could see the anger behind the calm eyes, that had a slight dark brown color from the red mixed into them, almost not noticble. He didnt care if anyone saw what he was right now, and he was an actor, so he could always say that he had a condition that made him cry blood, or that he had been at a site, when he got a call.

He only stepped to the side, so she could do what it was that needed to be done, but he looked at Spencer with determination. " I´m not going to leave your side this time, no matter what, i WONT ". He looked at the nurse to make it clear for her this time to. Last time he left him, he died.. this time, this time he wouldnt. He held Spencer´s hand so tight, but without breaking it. " I know you can do it Spencer, i know where ever you are, here or.. or on your way to fucking heaven or limbo or whatever.. stay with me, please.. just fight, fight! ". He leaned in, a tear rolling down, but this time much smaller, as if he couldnt cry anymore from lack of blood. He could feel the hunger lingering, but Spencer didnt look like food for him, he would never look like food for him.. he was an equal in his eyes.

His eyes widened when Spencer started to speak up. He smiled but the smiled suddenly dropped, when he heard the sir. * has he forgotten me.. *. His expression dropped and sadness was only present in his golden eyes. He held Spencer´s hand tightly in his, before saying with a low, almost breaking voice. " I-Its me.. James.. dont you remember me? ". He looked perplex, what should he do?. He narrowed his eyes for a moment, looking at Spencer in front of him. He was so confused.. was it not him?. He knew about different creatures, but he didnt know about banshees. He knew that Spencer wasnt a werewolf... he looked at Spencer for a moment, before saying in a low tone. " Are you.. Spencer.. ". He knew that it was a long shot, but he was willing to try anything, say anything.. he just wanted him back. His hands were shaking, from happyness but also the shock.

Spencer was happy when James was not doing as he was told, when he wanted to stay by his side. He wouldn’t want anything less than to wake up to James, everyday if he could. But now he just had to be patient, hoping the ghost would be kind to him. He was going to fight, he was. He was nowhere near ready to leave. He just had to figure out how to do it. Last time it had only been for a short while. The spirit was not strong enough to fight against him. He had a feeling it was different with Samantha. She had more control of his body already. Hopefully she would not be too much a struggle when it was time to take back his body.

The ghost, Samantha, was looking between the nurse and the vampire who seemed so sad. It tingled in the hands to grab for his. She lifted the hand and looked at the more masculine hand compared to what she had been used to. She looked at the vampire again. ”No,” she simply responded, putting a hand on his throat when the voice was different. What a weird feeling. Samantha ran a hand through his hair. She chuckled, which also sounded different. She shook his head when the vampire asked if she was Spencer. ”Samantha.” She looked around the room. It was different to see it like this, when you were alive. ”My brother… I need to find him.” She sat up and now felt how sore his body was and laid back down.

Spencer had to try and convince her to give James a message, to tell him what to do before he could get back. It was so strange feeling like this, like you were no longer in control of your own body. It never worked for long, as there were two souls in one body. Eventually one would have to go. He had to fight to make sure it was him. *Samantha,* he said in his thoughts, only Samantha was able to hear it. *Can you please tell him something from me?* She nodded his head, which would probably seem out of place with James and the nurse. *Tell him that I’m still in here. I will come back if he helps you find peace. If he helps you find your brother.* Samantha looked at the vampire. ”He is still here. He says if you help me find peace, he will come back.” Maybe he wouldn’t believe her, but she would have to convince him then. She would do anything to make sure her brother was okay. She had not been able to leave the hospital since she died all those years ago. Now she finally could. Now she could go make sure her brother didn’t blame himself for the accident, that he was happy.

James looked rather confused for a second, when Spencer said no, that he wasnt Spencer?. He had exspected something along the lines of ' of course im Spencer, who else ', but he didnt and that thought alone, freaked him the fuck out. He could only stand there, still holding Spencer´s hand in his, looking like someone who had just seen a ghost, without even realising, that.. that was actually the actual case here. A posession. Both his expressions and his tone of voice, how he carried himself, it all didnt scream Spencer, but someone else. When Spencer said Samantha, he looked even more confused, raising his brows for a second, looking behind him, as to not lose face for a moment. * What is happening.. *. He pinched the skin above his nose, while closing his eyes, trying to gain some sense from it all, before stopping and then looking at Spencer again, when he said that he needed to find his brother. " NO ". He looked serious this time, before almost pushing Spencer down into the bed. " You brother.. ". He stopped in his sentence.. it didnt make sense for Spencer to see his brother, not right now at least?. He tried to understand it. " What´s happening with you?.. ". He tilted his head for a moment, when Spencer suddenly nodded out of the blue.

He had gone mad with grief perhaps, or maybe he hit his head?.. well, more like got hit in his head from the gun. He put his free hand on the forhead of Spencer, looking worried at him, almost with what could resemble puppy eyes, as he didnt have a clue what to do in this situation. He looked shocked, when se suddenly said that he was still there, that he would come back, if he helped her find peace. " Wait.. so you are Samantha ". His voice was low as to not seem like a crazy person. " But how are we going to.. ". He quickly found his phone before looking for a moment at it. " Okay so.. i ". He didnt want Spencer to leave the bed, even if it was Samantha. " Okay, here is what we do. Give me your brothers full name, and adress, and if you can remember ANY number, even for family members.. and then, i will record a video, where you speak from Spencer, BUT.. you have to say something that only your brother knows and then the message, and i promise you, i WILL try to get ahold of him, as fast as possible, but you CANT leave this bed. Do you understand ". He looked with a serious but gentle expression at Spencer, before taking his phone. He knew that they just couldnt call the person and then talk, the man would properly thing they were insane, no.. a video would be so much better.

He hoped that se would agree, and that she would leave.. that they didnt have to wait to see if the brother responded, but if it had to be like that, then it had too. " I will stay at your side Samantha, but know this.. if Spencer comes to any harm, i will not hesitate.. to harm others ". He looked at her, making sure that she understood her position, that it wasnt her that he was talking about. If she said the name and number, he would write it down, before waiting to see if she would make the video. He was glad that the nurse had left, but he didnt know for how long.

Samantha was not sure how this worked, and it seemed Spencer was the same way. They were both new to this. She didn’t make a habit going around possessing people, but something drew her to the boy. Like she had to know he was there. It was almost impossible for her to not reach for him. She had been lucky to have been the first that got to him. She made a slight jump with his body when the vampire firmly said no. She suspected it was about Spencer’s brother and not hers. He still needed time to understand the situation. She didn’t get a chance to explain the situation before Spencer spoke to her.

Samantha looked at the vampire who looked so worried. He cared for Spencer, that much was clear. He put a hand on his forehead, checking to see if he had a temper, surely. She nodded when he stated that she was Samantha. ”I’m not sure how to explain it,” she could not do it herself. Perhaps Spencer could help. But then James came up with a plan of what to do. ”I understand. Thank you.” It was maybe more for Spencer’s sake than hers, but it still mattered to her. ”His name is Brandon Peterson. It’s been a while since I saw him. Last I heard he was living at Mikaelson road 14. It’s been five years, he might have moved.” She picked her memory for any number, but she came up blank. She was not interested in hurting anyone. She only did this because of her brother. ”He will not be harmed.” She took in a sharp breath. ”I will leave when the video is filmed. I hope the two of you will get it to him, or I will continue to follow him around. It is beyond my control.” She knew now, she would never leave his side until she had finished her unfinished business.

Samantha filmed the movie, started by telling a story of when their father took them finishing. She was nine and he was six. He wanted so badly to make their dad proud, so when Samantha caught a fish instead of Brandon, she gave hers to him. She then continued to say how much she loved and missed him and hoped he had everything he ever dreamed off, then ending it by saying how the car accident wasn’t his fault. ”I want to see him. Can you and Spencer go by his new house when he is better? I don’t think I can leave before then.” She was going to leave his body, when she was sure she would get a chance to see Brandon.

He noted everything down, the name the road, even her name and the five years. He dearly hoped that he hadnt moved, as that would make everything so much harder if they had to actually seek him out, which was properly for the best, seeing as it wasnt a good idea to just send the video, freaking the person out. He looked at Spencer, hoping to hear some sort of phone number but when nothing came up, he just nodded as to understanding that this was not gonna be an easy task, if the man didnt live the same place anymore. When she said that she would leave when the video had been filmed, he looked joyfully at her, but his expression suddenly dropped again, before looking down for a moment, trying to sort out his feeling a little. He didnt know what kind of side of Spencer he would be seeing, and it had all been his fault. He looked at her, before saying with a serious expression on his face again. " I cannot promise you, that Spencer wants to seek your brother out, but i will promise you.. that i will. If this means so much to you, then i will do it.. if it had been Spencer and a message to me or the other way around, i would hope.. someone would do the same for me or him ". He looked at her with a gentle expression, still feeling weird inside about the whole thing, but it didnt show on his face.. a perk of being an actor.

He started filming Spencer, feeling weird hearing a story coming from his mouth, not knowing if he just made a fool of him, or actually if he was another person, but the way that he talked and acted, it couldnt be.. and if it were like that, well then he was even an better actor than himself. He smiled at the thought for a moment, forgetting all about the sadness for a time, before hearing her plea once again. " I will try my best to convince him. Spencer is a good man, i know that if i ask him, he is properly gonna say yes, besides he loves to adventure out.. and it even fits october, almost like a spooky episode of some series, so i´m almost positive, that he is gonna jump into it with both legs, but dont think.. that i dont take this seriously.. i would give everything to see my mother or meet her.. for just one time ". He smiled slightly, before shaking his head. It would never be possible.. vampires didnt have souls, did they?.. no.. or maybe.. purebloods had?. He didnt know, but right now, it also wasnt important.

He looked at Spencer with a hopefull expression, hoping that this was enough, and that Spencer could go back to his own body now, where ever he was. He looked at her, feeling the sadness rush over him. He quickly asked, before she disappeared. " Wait.. i.. i have a question.. its gonna sound so stupid but.. if your brother had been violent against you and someone you cared for, would.. would you be angry, if someone killed him ". He looked down " Not that.. it has anything to do with your brother but, i.. i never had any siblings and.. and i.. i think i killed his brother, and i know deep down, that he properly.. no definitely deserved it, but.. will he hate me now ". A tear slim and almost not there.. dropped from his cheek, after caressing it gently, down to the jawline, before he looked at Spencer.. waiting to hear the answer.

Samantha knew he was already doing enough to help her. Asking for more was maybe wrong, but she had to try. She might never get the chance again. ”He will.” She knew. She could feel it, feel Spencer. She didn’t understand everything, but she did understand that he had to be very confused with so many emotions roaming freely, impossible to tame. He could be calm one second and angry the next. The mood swings had to be exhausting to live with. She also knew he was great at dealing with it. Much better than she would have been. She looked at him with a smile, much different than the ones Spencer put up, it wasn’t cheeky or sarcastic, like most of his were. It was sweet, warm. ”It is not often you meet so caring people. I appreciate it.”

He started filming Spencer, feeling weird hearing a story coming from his mouth, not knowing if he just made a fool of him, or actually if he was another person, but the way that he talked and acted, it couldnt be.. and if it were like that, well then he was even an better actor than himself. He smiled at the thought for a moment, forgetting all about the sadness for a time, before hearing her plea once again. " I will try my best to convince him. Spencer is a good man, i know that if i ask him, he is properly gonna say yes, besides he loves to adventure out.. and it even fits october, almost like a spooky episode of some series, so i´m almost positive, that he is gonna jump into it with both legs, but dont think.. that i dont take this seriously.. i would give everything to see my mother or meet her.. for just one time ". He smiled slightly, before shaking his head. It would never be possible.. vampires didnt have souls, did they?.. no.. or maybe.. purebloods had?. He didnt know, but right now, it also wasnt important.

Samantha could understand why it was difficult to believe. She wasn’t completely sure if he did. No matter what, she felt grateful for him working with her. ”Maybe you can see her again. You should ask him. He might be able to help.” She gave him a nod, laying back in bed ready to leave. She stopped when he spoke again. She was quiet a moment, waiting for Spencer to say something. *No.* She shook her head. ”He doesn’t hate you.” She closed his eyes, releasing herself from the body. The heartbeat grew in intensity until it was back to that of a normal heartbeat per minute.

Spencer opened his eyes slowly, blinking to get used to being back in charge. ”Fuck I hate that.” He took in a deep breath, reaching for James’ hand. He looked at him, before seeing something behind him. He smiled at Samantha as she floated there patiently, waiting for them to go to her brother. He felt a connection to her that was stronger than with the other ghosts. He didn’t mind it with her but was not keen or having that with too many of them. ”I guess I should explain.”

He looked at her with his eyes wide, waiting when she closed her eyes, before finally seeing them open again, hearing the familiar tone of voice. He embraced Spencer when he reached for his hand. " Syyhh.. not now, just.. this ". He hugged him, embraced everything and all of him. He let his head rest against Spencer´s shoulder, feeling the warmth against his forhead, but there was also something cold about him. He sighed shortly, before kissing his shoulder, not knowing what to do with himself or even with Spencer at this very moment. He closed his eyes, trying to hold back tears, as to not lose even more blood. He felt hungry beyond what he had thought was possible.. but he also felt happyness and relief, as if he had come home... as if Spencer was home for him. He didnt want to let go, but he knew that he couldnt just sit here and hug him forever, at some point.. he had to see him in the eyes, feel maybe the guilt of having killed his brother, but then again.. he had a bad feeling about everything, and how they had come to Nate´s aid.. he just hoped that he had hit him in the heart, that he was dead by now, but could werewolfs even die that easy?.

Slowly, as if he did everything not to be too wild o anything like it.. he slowly held Spencer out in his embrace, before looking at him. " You had me worried sick.. ". He looked down. He didnt look like the same James he had met. He had blood all over his face, on his hands, and his clothes was also covered some bit, and his hair was a mess, sticking to his forhead, with some blood in it. He had tear trails down his cheeks to his throat, and he looked like he had partied for days, which he had, but Spencer didnt need to hear that.. yet.. or maybe ever. He wasnt proud of what he had done, but then again.. they werent together.. maybe Spencer would never be one to do just that.. but couldnt he still be near him then?, loving him. He wanted to give him everything, even himself. He took Spencer´s hand if he would let him, before saying " You need to rest, please.. lay down.. a doctor is coming soon ".

He slowly got up from the side of the bed, before walking over to the sink, cleaning his face a little and then his hands, so he looked more decent. He then turned to Spencer, after having looked into the mirror for some time. He still had some blood at his ears, but it was only a little. His eyebrow had a little fling in it, but it would heal, as soon as he got a good deal of blood inside. He looked at Spencer with a gentle expression, a loving one. " I was so.. scared ". His voice was trembling, as if it would crack at any moment. He sat at the side of the bed again, taking one leg a little up on the bed. He looked at him, before taking his hand, squezing it a little. " I´m so sorry.. i should never had shown myself.. if i had just kept away as i wrote to you, then nothing would have happened. I´m sorry for bothering you, and messaging you and just.. pulling you into this ". He didnt know the whole situation, or that Spencer hadnt had his phone in days. He just knew, that Spencer was here, because of him.

Spencer closed his eyes, just enjoying feeling James close to him. He was still getting over everything that had happened at the hotel, both emotionally and physically. He would be okay soon enough. He did after all heal better than the average human, but only a little. He would still feel some symptoms for a little while longer. He sighed blissfully as they just laid there. It had been torture to see James react like he had and not be able to do anything. He didn’t care about anything else right now, he just knew he would never want to be apart from James again. They would have to talk about that at some point, but not now. Now he was not going ruin this moment by bringing up such an important topic. He smile when he felt the kiss on his shoulder.

Spencer looked at him when he pulled away. His words made him look away too. ”I know. I’m so sorry James,” he could see he was different right than from every other time they had been together. It was understandable, and Spencer didn’t care about it. He wanted them to be with each other through the good and the bad. Right now it was bad, but if they could survive this, he would still have hope for them. ”Okay,” he said letting his finger move over the back of James’ hand until he moved away from the bed.

He looked more like himself when he returned. ”I saw it. I saw and heard everything.” He didn’t think James should feel responsible for any of this. It was easy for him to say, as he was blaming himself all the time. ”I never got the texts,” he admitted. ”You didn’t pull me into anything. I’ve been in this from the day I was born. It was me who pulled you into this.” He swung his legs over the bed and stood up, taking the few steps to James. ”I don’t want you to ever think this was your fault. When it comes to by brother, it is always his fault.” He put a hand on his neck, caressing in sweetly. ”I should have gotten to you sooner. I have been such a mess.” He had done a lot of shit after what happened at the cemetery. He had been so self-destructive. He didn’t want to be like that with James. He would have found him, when he was doing better. He just didn’t want to destroy what they had. ”I really like you. And that’s fucking scary. I’m scared of falling. But I am. I’m falling for you and I just…” He looked away. ”I couldn’t handle that on top of my brother coming here.”