Am I only to feel pain? (TW)

Time Around Midnight
Date/Month It's around January 8th
Place An alleyway in Southside
Surroundings The streets are pretty empty, and it's the more abandoned part. There's trash on the ground, and you can see blood from previous murders
Weather It's cold and raining a bit
Clothing
- Clothes + Shoes She's wearing a back hoodie, with some dark pants. Underneath she's wearing a tank top. As for shoes, it's a pair of sneakers
- Hair + Make-up + Jewellery Her hair is at first put up in a ponytail, but then gets loose, her hair reaches her ass. She has no make-up on. She has a necklace, with a locket and a picture of herself and her first love
- Accent British Voice
- Other things She's 1,61 meters tall. She has a unique scent around her. She also has a magical bag, which she stole. It allows her more storage for her stuff, in a small looking bag, while also not being hard to carry around (appearance)

The Topic is Dedicated to: @Nerissa <3

It was cold, colder than usual and more times than one, she had to let the long slews cover her hands. She could even see her own breath, each time she sucked in air, and her lips which at this point had a slight color of blue, seemed almost to peele a bit. She knew she had to find somewhere to sleep for the night, but at the same time, it wasn't going to be much easier than finding food. She sighed and continued through the dark streets, which was only slightly illuminated by the street lights. It was clear that this was a more abandoned part of Southside, but considering how most of this city part was, it wouldn't be much of a surprise anymore to see trash and blood, even bodyparts around the streets and alleyways. It's almost as if whatever royalty ruled over Gaia, had completely given up on it, they lived their happy lives and everyone else was just forced to adapt.
She didn't come very far, only halfway through the entrance of a dark alleyway, when a hand suddenly grabbed her by the hair. She was pulled in with such force, that she did register anything, and even dropped her handbag, as her face hit a brick wall, and pain started to arise from her throbbing cheek. She barely got to exclaim; "What the fuck?" before she was turned around, and this time it was her back against the wall "Why hello Love, it's been too long, far too long if you ask me" a deep voice grinned, as a face got closer, and suddenly she realized what had happened, "I told him I was going to get the money, I just need more time" she almost begged, feeling disgusted she had to go to that level "Well Jimmy says he wants his money, but he also suggested that if you didn't pay up, we could get the payment in other ways" even though it wasn't said directly, what this "other payment" could be, she didn't have the slightest doubt what they meant, and it was at that moment she began to fight. She tried hitting him, but he apparently had friends with him, and before she knew it, a fist connected with her face and the back of her head connected with the wall behind her, and a ringing sound made every other sound feel distant, as the taste of blood reached her.
She wasn't in shock, but in some ways, she almost kind of was, as it didn't fully reach her what they were doing until the hoodie was ripped apart and her skin suddenly felt extremely cold "Please don't do this" again she begged, begged for a humanity she ned they didn't have, which became apparently clear, as the "friends" held her hands. She had almost wished, that if they were to do it that he'd at least turn her around, so she didn't have to look at his face, however, he did seem to enjoy seeing the tortured look in his victims. A knife suddenly came out, and with it, he destroyed the tank top, and the sudden urge to hide away her naked torso reached her, but at last her arms was constrained in tight grips, and all she could do was whimper and contain the tears coming to her eyes. She turned her face to the side, as her pants and panties got ripped off, and a throbbing pain began. She bit down into her lower lip, so hard blue blood emerged, but he didn't seem to notice, considering he was in a stasis of pleasure, coming from the constant moans he made. It would all be over soon, and then she could leave, was what she told her self over and over again, trying to make this hell seem less like torture.

Clothing
- Clothes Link
- Accent American
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Nerissa had had a hard time adjusting to things around her. The cold weather didn't make it any easier for the shapeshifter. She owned nothing. Had nothing. Nerissa wished for a day where she wouldn't have to steal to be warm for to feed herself. She was tired and hungry. She had tried to borrow a phone, in hopes of getting in contact with her mother - but had no luck. It was only few weeks ago since she finally had made someone take her bracelet of, to let her powers escape. However, she was no master in controlling them yet - so she tried to keep it low-key.
Or that was till she head something not far away in the ally that made her frown. Nerissa wasn't a violent person, but since the past ten years in Eichen - she was barely a person, more a trapped animal. Nerissa had learned to be unseen to avoid trouble. She grabbed a baseball bat she found on the ground - Southside was a pure gem of lost items. Her grib tightened around the bat as she came closer to the situation. Her heart was pounding crazy and she folded her lips to try thinking about what to do. She looked down on the ground as she felt creatures running around her feet. Mice and rats were running on the ground. The street animals had been the only friends she have had since she escaped, and it wouldn't be the first attack they helped her stop.
"Hey asshole," she spoke up and felt her heart skip a beat when turned his head - clearly unhappy that she stopped his pleasuring moment. "I'm Nerissa," she added as she swung the bat, letting it collide with his face and knocked him out.  The rats ran over his body and the mice ran up his friends legs. They screamed in panic. Nerissa didn't pay much attention to the men, but looked over at the woman. "Are you alright?" She asked and removed her coat to hand it to the girl. Nerissa wasn't warmly dressed either, but she perhaps was better adjusted to the cold. "Let's get away from here, can you walk?"

As it all happened, she would continue to say that she would be okay, that everything was okay and that this wouldn't change her, because she was so scared that if she just stopped for one moment, even for a tiny second she would drown in all the reasons she wasn't. She couldn't even let her tears fall down, even though it had continued to sting in her eyes, almost begging for them to come out, but it would be a weakness and she couldn't be weak in front of them. Sometimes she would even close her eyes, and imagine that this was all a big bad dream and that she was actually safe, but then she was reminded of the constant pain, and suddenly she couldn't imagine it being some kind of dream.
However, what she had not expected was, that when she was to open her eyes a woman carrying a baseball bat would suddenly appear, and before she knew it she'd knocked out one man and the two others appeared to be attacked by rats. With her hands now free, she quickly covered herself, but the woman suddenly handed her a jacket, which she covered herself with "Not really no, but I'm used to it" was the only thing she answered with or rather commented on the maybe a bit too foolish question, on whether she was okay or not. None the less she walked, or walked as good as she could, for someone who had just been raped, which probably wasn't the most graceful movement "Yeah, a bit" she walked out of the alleyway and grabbed her handbag. She looked back at the strange, but also kind woman, who now appeared to be her savior of some sort "I know a place" she'd been on her way there when they had attacked her, but it was still a good place, or at least in some ways, it was her place.

Nerissa frowned by the comment being used to it. She hated how some people had to view the world's cruelty. Nerissa herself was used to be alone, isolated from the world around her. It was a rather sad reality being treated like a freak or just weak. It was on the minimum of social activity that happened to her in the past year. She had no idea how to fully understand or be their for others. It seemed so far away in her brain. Nerissa just stood by and watched the stranger walk over and grab her bag. The shapeshifter frowned a bit and tilted her head to the side before the girl said she knew a place. "O, yeah okay," she walked over to the stranger, didn't really know what to do with herself. The rats were eating the meat from the passed out men, and she really didn't want to stay there and listen to their thoughts either.
"So what kind of place?" She had to ask. Nerissa was still on the run, and didn't want anyone to figure out that she was here. "Not to sound like a freak, but I'm kinda on the run - so please don't turn me in. I can't stand the thought of going back to Eichen house.. I'm not that crazy," she explained with a little laugh. "I mean I did just hit someone with a bat.. and had rats eat them.. but I'm not insane.. so.. can I still join you?"

Her gaze had originally been on the streets, just to be sure Jimmy hadn't sent any more people out after her, and when she was sure about no one else being there, she turned her attention back to this Nerissa "It's an abandoned building, which has all of its walls up. I think they mean to build something but then ran out of money" she shrugged and held onto her bag, pulling it closer to her body. As Nerissa suddenly became quite talkative, reviling that she herself was on the run, however, from something quite different, she realized that despite not knowing this still very unfamiliar woman, she also discovered that they may have more in common than what she first thought "Let's just say if I don't turn you in, you don't turn me in? How does that sound?" she raised an eyebrow and looked at Nerissa as if to say she actually wouldn't do it. It would also be quite cruel actually, oh yeah thanks for helping me, let me stab you in the heart and send you back to such a fucked up place as a thank you.
"I mean I don't judge people, whatever you've done and why you were at Eichen house is really none of my business, but you did me a solid back there, so don't worry I won't repay your help by fucking you over" she almost smiled at this still strange, but somehow relatable woman "But yeah you can join me, and to be honest those idiots deserve what they had coming, and it was a pretty great hit too" it had almost been cute as if like Nerissa was unsure as of what to do when she asked whether or not she was still welcome to tag along. But it also kind of broke her heart, knowing she wasn't the only one who in some ways had been abandoned and betrayed in such extent, they didn't know who to trust or who would do as anyone else had done. She began walking, showing Nerissa the way to this building she had called home for the last few months.

She nodded as she took the information in that the girl gave her about the building. Southside was filled with abandoned buildings, some nicer to stay in than others. Nerissa frowned once more as the woman in her own way made a deal with her. Not that Nerissa would know who to call her in for. Was the woman in some sort of crime? She began to wonder. "I guess it sounds better than most offers I have had the past days," she chuckled a little to herself then crossed her arms. She tried to protect herself from the cold, but it wasn't really helping. Nerissa took a deep breath in. She had spend years trying to figure out what she had done, and always came up with the same answer - she had done nothing wrong. At least nothing with bad intentions. The thought of not knowing why her mother hadn't come to see her the last few years was a hurtful feeling. It hit her in the stomach and almost made her feel sick. "Thank you," she smiled a little as the stranger said she wouldn't just fuck her over. Nerissa looked ahead to try moving away from the ache her stomach was feeling. The last thing she needed was her ability to kick in. A pure laughter escaped from her lips when her hit with the bat from few minutes back was mentioned.  
"One would think I was a baseball player in my youth, but nah, its just pure talent," her lips pulled up in a little half smirk.
They walked up to the building and she moved her eyes around. Sometimes she still had trouble pulling apart the noise from the animals yelling and people who actually was talking. Nerissa took a deep breath in and put her arms down to her sides.
"Do you have any pets?" She asked and tilted her head to the side. Nerissa could sense a lot of stray animals in the area, her eyes even caught a cat slendering around the building.

Her eyes gazed back at Nerissa, and she nodded when a thank you was mentioned, it was the least she could do, while also being grateful for what this still stranger of a woman had done for her. Not many would go to those lengths to help af stranger, she had experienced before that most would just go on with their lives, making it seem as if they hadn't just seen someone in pain or distress. Had she herself had a more normal life, she would probably help others, who could not help themselves, show that this pain and this sorrow wasn't the only feeling one could have. But at last, she did not have a normal life, and therefore this really wasn't much of an option, as what she had wanted, so far it was just to live another day, sleep somewhere nice or semi-nice, and of course, get something to ear "At least that means you have talent for something" she pointed out, almost again letting the smile hit her lips, but her jaw and cheek hurt too much, and it was as if she never even tried.
She shook her head "no...and then yes, I mean I take care of the animals around the place" and as she said it, and saw the cat, who was now on her way over to them, she fished out some food from the bag and gave it to her "I love animals, they don't judge you for what you may look like, or how you live, they just love so innocently and strongly" she lifted the cat up, as the walked inside. She had decorated the lower floors, of what should have been a hotel or some sort, finding things like a sofa and other useful tools, which almost made for some sort of home. Most of the designs had been put down, and therefore it was a lot warmer inside than outside. She took off the coat and fished out some clothes from the bag, which she then put on, giving back the coat to Nerissa "I'm Love by the way...I mean that's my name" she had realized that Nerissa still didn't know her name.

"I have always loved animals as well," she pointed out with an almost innocent smile on her lips. "But my mum didn't believe me when I told her, they liked talking to me," she shook her head slightly by that thought. Her mother wasn't a bad person, she just wanted to make her better. There was no wrong in that now was there? Nerissa looked at the cat before following the girl inside. It looked nice despite what it was. Better than where Nerissa had spend her past years. "I'm Nerissa," she smiled at the girl's name. Love, it was an interesting name to have. She had never met anyone with a name like that. She took the coat as Love gave it back to her. "Thanks," she spoke quickly and looked around her with almost searching eyes. It was the voices of the animals around them, everything from spiders, to the cat to the birds outside. She had never learned to block out the voices, so she looked a bit confused. "I'm sorry, the voices.. they are a bit loud time to time," she admitted. Ever since getting out, she hadn't been taking her pills, the pills that put her abilities to sleep. Now they were activated.. and they weren't planning on going to sleep again.