You can't hurry love [cw]

It almost seemed like nothing wasn’t good. Everything he did was electrifying and he could see and hear on her that his would be an amazing time for both of them. She almost begged his name, which made him place a soft kiss on her cheek. He hummed a little, almost as if he wanted her to elaborate what she wanted. When she placed her hand on his chest, he pulled a little away so both of them could see each other in the eyes. “Yes?” he said softly, removing his hand from her pubic area and put it on her hip instead.

Now he was just not playing fair, he wanted her to tell him exactly what she wanted. Even though it was quite evident what it was? She sucked in her bottom lip and blinked a couple of times. As his hand moved from her pubic area, to place in her hip instead. She could feel, just how much he had excited her. Letting go of her lips she parted her lips to start speaking; “Now you’re just not playing fair” her voice was heavily affected by what he had been doing to her. Hanging low in the air, as her eyes blinked a couple of more times. “You want me to describe in graphic detail just how much I want you now, or?” she asked, almost not believe what words were coming out of her mouth right now. But she wanted him, and it was overwhelming just how much.
And then he was just playing a little with her, in the best way possible. But she still found it hard to focus.

He could almost see that he had misunderstood something. Not that it was that bad, but I she believed he was being unfair. It made him chuckle a little, shaking his head. “Sorry,” he said with a smile, “You don’t have to,” he said before he gave her a kiss on her lips. He straightened up, so he sat on his knees in front of her. He let both of his hands find the edge of her panties and pulled them off her. Maybe he had been doing a little to well of a job preparing her, but he could always be them for her, or let her borrow some of his, even though they might be too big for her.
He let them fall to the floor and shortly after took of his own boxers and put the protection on. He found his way back to her and kissed her “Ready?” he asked her a little short on breath from the excitement. If she agreed he would let them connect, watching her to make sure she was okay and that nothing seemed to be painful.

She chuckled softly as she noticed that they had both misunderstood each other. Him that she had said his name to make him stop. Her that he was being playful in a manner that she didn’t have the patience for right now. She kissed him back and hummed. Moving her body to help him get the rest of her clothes off. Violet let out a small breath as got up himself and pulled off his underwear. Swallowing a lump in her throat, as she realised just how serious this was. For a moment she was almost breathless with what was about to happen. Both excited and a little scared.
But when he came back and kissed her, he kissed away any doubt that this wasn’t a good thing. Nodding she gave him a small smile, “yes” she whispered to make sure that he knew that it was alright. A gasp left her, filled with both pain and pleasure. She felt how connected with her, and then it felt like something clicked. She moved her legs a little, to make it easier for him to move. Her hands found his shoulder and the other behind the nape of his neck. With a soft pull she moved him down to a kiss. Closing her eyes letting herself escape in their moment.

It wasn’t because he knew every sound that left her, but he was almost sure that the gasp that left her was both pleasure and pain. He simply hoped that the pain wasn’t that grand. She moved her legs and pulled him down to a kiss which he didn’t hesitate to reciprocate. He was quite certain that she felt comfortable now, and therefore he started to move, not breaking the kiss unless there was need of air. He was being gentle to her and did everything to make sure nothing was going to feel pain, even though it couldn’t be guaranteed. “How does it feel?” he whispered between their lips to make sure. That way it would hopefully be easier for her to tell how it actually felt, compared to if he asked if it felt good. He opened his eyes to watch her underneath him.

There was something so incredibly breath-taking with how they moved with each other. It almost made her forget that she actually needed to breathe. Which was where she differed from other vampires, she was both warm to the touch and had a beathing heart. That needed oxygen to function. But it was both hard to remember to do it, and also feel the pleasure that he was giving her. How the hell did people do this, and still have brain function to take charge. She felt completely at his mercy in all of this.
Her tongue glided over her teeth, before she pulled her bottom lip with her teeth. How did it feel? Could she even describe it, and make it justice just how good it felt right now? “It feels really good” she answered, opening her eyes. Her hands found his cheek and softly stroke over his cheekbone. “It feels, right” she tried to explain, pressing her forehead against his, looking down to where their bodies connected. She let one of her legs glided over his hipbone, and down the length of his body upside of where her leg was pressed against.

Her words comforted him and made him smile. It felt right. Somehow that was everything her had to know. Her hand against his cheek and cheekbone was mesmerizing. He let his forehead meet hers, as she pulled him a little closer. “Good,” he spoke softly He let one of his hands support her leg that she had moved up. He continued moving, getting a greater movement by every thrust, speeding a little up. Small, pleasured moans escaped his lips. He had experience and should be able to bring her pleasure, even though he knew that it could be difficult to bring a woman over the edge with just one kind of pleasure. While holding onto her leg he let the other hand place itself on top of her stomach, with a light pressure making sure that her spot would be easier to tease. Eventually he would leave the pressure and let his fingers pleasure as well as possible on her pleasure pearl. Hopefully he would make her reach her climax. After an experienced amount of time, he got over the edge, kissing her and holding her close as he did so.


Even though he still felt a little lightheaded from the lesser amount of blood he had gotten, he was even more lightheaded now, but still managed to clean up and offer Violet one of his t-shirts if she wanted to wear something that wasn’t her own. He pulled her close, laying in the bed and kissed her forehead. “How are you feeling?” he whispered to her, caressing her back a little while holding her close.

Now one thing she had never experienced, was when he finally pushed her over that edge. The state between feeling like you floated in the air, and thrills were storming through your body. Making your voice your pleasure without thinking about how loud you were. That your body more or less moved on its own, to cling onto something to make sure that you rode the wave out. And then when it was over, she just laid there, almost not able to move a muscle. She felt like she was both floating on air, but also that every part of her body ached and screamed for rest.

What time was it anyway? Where was her phone? She sat up in the bed and put on the t-shirt that Zadkiel had given to her. Cleaning herself up in the bathroom and went down to find her phone so she could text her father that she was going to spend the night, then she had crawled back into the bed. A soft hum left her, and a smile tugged at her lips when she placed her head on his chest, after he had placed a kiss on her forehead. “Amazing” she mumbled honestly, closing her eyes as he caressed her back. “How are you feeling?” she asked him back, lifting her head a little, mostly so she wouldn’t just fall asleep on the spot.

A smile stayed on his lips as she mentioned how she was feeling. He hummed a little as a reply to it. “I’m good… And really tired,” he replied with closed eyes. It was almost like his heart was being mended for every second they were there. He could feel how she looked up at him and opened one of his eyes. The hand which caressed her back moved up to reposition a strand of wild hair. He admired her eyes for a moment. The various colors, their form and her eyelids and lashes. Dangerous words lingers on his tongue, but instead of letting them spill way too early he leaned to reached her lips to place a soft kiss on them, sighing a little exhausted as his head fell back into the pillow.

She was glad that he was good and wasn’t second guessing what they had done. But then again, he wouldn’t tell her that, now, would he? Not that he thought that he was, giving him a soft smile when he opened his eyes to look at her. He took her breath away yet another time, with how he looked into her eyes. It made her pick up the slight nuances that there were in all of the brown. So warm and inviting. Leaning towards him she met him halfway when he kissed her. And as his head fell back down into the pillow she chuckled. “I’ve already texted my father that I will be staying here” she whispered and placed her own head down. A soft exhausted sigh left her. "Sleep well" she hummed and as soon as she closed her eyes, she fell asleep.

He turned his head a little as she mentioned how she had already texted her father about staying the night. He smiled softly at her. “I guess he was okay with it?” he mumbled and let his hand run through some of her hair. “Goodnight, Vi,” he hummed back and shortly after falling asleep with her in his arms.

The doorbell rung, and it woke Zadkiel immediately. He was very energized already. His eyes wide and blinking a little. He looked towards Violet by his side, seemingly not that much of a morning person. “I’ll just get the door,” he mumbled to her, trying to untangle himself from her and quickly got dressed and walked downstairs to the front door that he opened. An unknown man stood there. Zadkiel frowned for a moment. He hadn’t even looked himself in the mirror, and his hair was everywhere.
King had been the one to wake Zadkiel with the doorbell. He had promised Nathalie to deliver a message, and that was why he was here. “Hi?” Zadkiel spoke.
“Hi. Name’s King.” Cliché name. Zadkiel didn’t respond to it and the man picked that up. “I’m here on behalf of Nathalie,” he then said. An uncomforting feeling spread in all of Zadkiel’s chest. He wished to close the door in the face of the man and crawl back under the sheets. He wanted to hide. “Nathalie and I love together,” he elaborated. Zadkiel could feel how a lump formed in his throat, feeling like he couldn’t speak. Had Zadkiel made Nathalie cheat? Shit. This wasn’t good. Okay, so far, the man seemed quite calm, and maybe it was nothing. Zadkiel nodded a little, wanting the man to continue with telling what his purpose was. “She wants to apologize,” Zadkiel frowned even further and for a moment he was slowly moving the door, indicating that he wanted to close it. “She believed you too probably shouldn’t see each other before the both of you are feeling better,” Zadkiel nodded a little, “If you want her to come and apologize by herself, it can be arranged, but as of for now, she’s staying away.”
Zadkiel nodded a little before he shook his head. “You can tell her it’s too late to apologize,” he said pulling a sad smile before he closed the door. He closed the door in front of King and walked back up unless Violet had gotten downstairs to him. Zadkiel wasn’t feeling that well now. God, if Nathalie and this… King just stayed away, things would be so much easier.

They were awoken rather abruptly by the doorbell ringing. Who on earth was ringing on the door this early? Wait, what was the time? She mumbled a little, when he told her that he would get the door. Tempted to just pull him back in the bed, with the words that they could just come back later. But she didn’t, folding herself into the warm covers from the bed, closed eyes with a soft hum. But as the voices travelled towards her, she slowly opened her tired eyes. Moving around a little in the bed, as she could make out enough towards to make her brows press together. It was a male voice this time, but she picked up the name Nathalie. Which meant this couldn’t be good, she wondered if she should go downstairs. But as she heard the door close, and that his steps were taking him upstairs she waited. Sitting up with her hair in every direction she pushed her hand through her untamed mane.
“Come here” she whispered reaching out her hand to beckon him to take it and let her guide him back into the bed.

Violet’s voice sounded as she got inside his bedroom and he looked towards her, how she had her arm out. He pulled on a slight smile as he approached her. The smile wasn’t entirely happy, but it was there, glad that she was here. A soft chuckle left him as she pulled him back into the bed and rolled onto his back and pulled her close, just like the night before where they had fallen asleep. His heart was beating a little faster, and his breath slightly shallower, mostly because the short visit had made him more sad than glad. He just wanted Nathalie out of his life, and he wondered for a moment how he would be able to do that. Would he have to move, and if so, would there be problems with Letha? Where should he move to? There was a lot of questions running through his mind, and he surely couldn’t keep all of them at once place. “Are you hungry?” he mumbled.

She hugged him close and moved her body so she could place his head against her chest. Closing her eyes as she placed her head on top of his. Her eyes closed Being in the moment, letting him decide if he wanted to talk about it, or just needed to be within himself and figure out what he was even feeling about the whole thing.
Her mind still very tired, it was hard not just to fall asleep once again. But when he asked if she was hungry, she nodded slowly. “Yeah, a little” she whispered, but didn’t really give any indication that she was going to move. Just a little too comfortable in the position they were in right now. “But I don’t really want to move” she chuckled, still with her eyes move. She let out a soft exhale and licked her lips.

She told him that she was a little hungry. He simply stared for a moment. Thinking about, well a million things. What he should be making them to eat, what had happened downstairs – what had happened up here. His arms didn’t lessen the grip around her, so it was quite okay that she didn’t just want to get up and out of the bed. “Neither do I,” he sighed softly paying attention to every single detail there was in the ceiling. “It was my neighbor’s roommate,” he spoke softly, “He wanted to apologize on her behalf,” he gave a short chuckle, clearly not liking the thought of forgiving her yet.

As it didn’t seem like he wanted to let go just yet, she started to caress his hair. Slowly and gently moving some of the brown hair around. Massaging the scalp as he told her what had happened. Her brows pressed together. Nathalie had wanted to apologize? That sounded, weird. Had she not known what she had been doing, or was there something else that had happened after she had left them? One could never really know what was going on inside other people’s heads. “You don’t have to accept the apology if you don’t want to, the most important part is to forgive yourself and let go of anger that is connected to what other people did to you” she licked her lips, moving her fingers down to his ear and softly caressed him there. “Not that I’m saying you should do it today, it can take years before you realise that you can let go and just, live with the fact that something horrible happened to you, that shouldn’t have” she whispered, knowing that the way she spoke would give him the idea that she was speaking from experience.
Licking her lips, she closed her eyes. “I’ve been abused too” she explained “when I confronted him, he told me that he hadn’t done anything wrong, and that I had been the one kissing him, even though I told him no when he kept going” she continued, looking towards him she gave him a small smile “All I’m saying, that an apology is better than someone telling you that your feelings about an incident isn’t valid, but not that you are obligated to forgive her if you don’t want to” maybe therapy was starting to help, who knew, she was actually talking. A whole new Violet.  

Zadkiel closed his eyes and enjoyed the light scalp massage he was given. He listened to how she presented to him, that it was more important for him to forgive himself. His eyes stayed closed and felt how her fingers traveled. Something about her fingers moving around made him calm down so much. If it wasn’t because he was a morning person, there would be a chance that he would fall asleep again. While she spoke about how he didn’t need to forgive himself this specific day, he could hear how it seemed to be a little too familiar of a subject to Violet.
I’ve been abused too.
He wished to look up at her, tell her that he was sorry that she had gone through that, but somehow she also knew that if he did that it might feel a little too intimidating to explain. So, he waited for a little. As she explained what had happened, and how the abuser had continued even though she had said no. It lit a spark of anger in him and to some extent, he felt he could use an hour on boxing just because of that. Well, at least it was a healthier way to channel one’s anger. He looked up at her as she got to her conclusion. “I’m sorry that happened to you,” he said softly. His own experience didn’t matter as much anymore, even though it had been something that had been going of a month’s time. “Do you want to talk about it?” he spoke carefully.

She let her fingers danced over his cheekbone as he told her that he was sorry it had happened to you. “I’m sorry that it happened to you too” she whispered, as her thumb glided from his cheek towards his temple. A small smile formed on her lips when he asked if she wanted to talk about it. Her fingers dragged their nails softly through his hair. “You need to work on being okay also being a victim” she whispered moving his hair around, not blaming him for rather letting her talk than himself. “I was only telling you, because I wanted to let you know that you’re not alone” she continued, leaning a little closer to him and placed a kiss towards his forehead. “But if it makes you feel more at ease, we can talk about it, if you want” she added as a last remark, somehow not afraid to tell him what her own experience had cause of traumas. What the boy had left behind, and how she still had troubles with driving in a car or have someone try to take off her pants. At least she was working on the part of sitting next to someone in the car, and she could take her pants off herself. Now she just needed to open up more, which was coming. Slowly, but she was healing. She could feel it.

Zadkiel pulled a trying smile as she was sorry that it had happened to him too. Well, of course he had wished it hadn’t happened, but it had, and he just had to move on, right? A man shouldn’t just rest in such traumas… ‘He should have appreciated that she wanted him’. He could almost feel his uncles shouting words and the spit hitting his face when he did so.
Violet shared her opinion on how he should work on being okay with being a victim. It made his stomach turn, because he hadn’t really gotten that deep in therapy about Marc, only that Zadkiel never really liked him and believed he had some very strict rules that he had to follow. “Yeah,” he exhaled. She explained that she only told him because she didn’t want him to feel alone about it. Well, he didn’t feel alone about it when he had Violet right there. He closed his eyes as she kissed his forehead. She was ready to talk about it. For a moment he was thinking whether or not she had been speaking to anyone else about it and words lingered on his tongue about Marc. It almost felt like his back was teasing him with an unpleasant tickling. He wanted to get up and train till his hands hurt more than the thoughts. “How old were you?” he spoke with a careful and hush tone.

She could almost feel how he was battling some unwanted demons in his mind. She didn’t ask, at least not yet. Hoping he one day would be comfortable enough to share them with her. But that was why they were in therapy, right? So, that they one day could live with their scars and demons without letting them rule their way of living. That would be day, Violet thought for herself. Not really seeing it yet, but at least she had hope now. There had been times where she hadn’t seen an end to everything, and then it had just been so easy to fade away. Who would miss her? At that time, not really anyone. There would be people that would be sad to hear that she would have died, but you couldn’t miss someone that you didn’t know who was.
When Zadkiel asked how old she had been, her fingers stopped their movement through his hair. Just for a moment, before she continued. “Sixteen” she whispered, closing her eyes. She shouldn’t have, but she was right back at the car where it had happened. Violet quickly opened them again, letting out a small breath of air. “He had offered to drive me home, it didn’t have any control over my own powers, so – while it happened, and I was shouting the car started to rattle, and as if it was being pushed together by an invisibly force it crumbled, I teleported out but he was stuck inside” she licked her lips “He can’t walk anymore” she whispered, remembering the words she had told him when he had backlashed with it had been her fault, all of it. That she was glad he was in the chair, and that the only comfort she had was that he would never be able to abuse another girl again.

Sixteen. That could’ve been him and Noa. It was such a long time ago, and yet it was right in the back pocket. Memories that were easy to reach. He remembered how innocent they had been and how things had turned a few years into the relationship. How he had been shot. Mhm, yes, memories. No trauma.
He could almost see and hear that she was conflicted just by closing her eyes. It made him hold his breath for a moment. The air slowly got out of his lungs as she explained how it had happened. It wasn’t because he had asked what had happened, but he had a feeling, that since she told him it was because she wanted to share it. He raised himself up to his elbows so he could look at her better. Leaning his weight over to one of the arms he removed a strand of her hair. “Well at least he won’t be able to do it again,” he said with a soft smile. No, it wasn’t really because he wanted to cheer her up, but he wanted her to feel comfortable. “Sorry,” he said furrowing his brows shortly of himself. It might have been a little too much to say. He had more words that was stuck on his tongue, because how would he be able to explain himself so it wouldn’t sound odd or accidentally pick in anything she wasn’t ready to get into. “I… Okay, it might sound odd, but you did very well last night,” he said, and tried not to smile too much from the memory, “So, I just want to be sure you’re okay with what happened? I know it might seem a little odd to ask about now, but I just got a little insecure now that we both got a story in that caliber. I don’t know I think I’m just cautious of you not regretting it or having changed your mind or-” He realized that he was rambling and shut his lips. It hadn't even been that he wanted to ask her about. He had wanted to know if there was anything he could do, or if there was anything that might trigger her, since he had Tien who he knew had some triggers, and well... Violet might just have some with a car?

She gave him a soft smile; he didn’t need to apologise for speaking the truth. Nor what was the first thing on his mind. She would rather have him do it all the time. “You don’t need to apologise” she whispered, knowing it was hard for him. Her fingers glided from his hair down to his cheek, with the back of her fingers, she pressed her knuckles against his cheekbone before she let her hand find his upper arm instead. Her eyes didn’t leave his as he started explaining what was on his mind. Her brows started to press together as he started blabbering about that he hoped that she was okay. If she had regretted it, or if she was changing her mind. When he shut his lips, realising himself how he was rambling. She let out a small sigh. Now she wanted to chuckle at him, but didn’t because she understood the insecurity. “Zadkiel” she whispered his name and leaned forward to press her lips against his. “Last night” a small break “Was perfect, and I don’t regret any of it, and at least not that I did it with you, because I really like you, and probably more than like. But I want to get to know your better. To make you comfortable enough to show me your scars, and be okay to be vulnerable with me, because you’re the only person where I truly can be that with, and I hope that either I or someone else can give you the same security” she whispered, giving him a small smile, feeling how small tears were forming in the sides of her eyes. A little overwhelmed just how much she cared about him.

She sighed and he felt his heart drop a little, though it was lessened when she leaned forwards and kissed him. Perfect. It was almost too much to hear. She even continued with telling him that she really liked him – and probably even more. Her words honestly sounded too good to be true, because I really sounded like they were on the same page. She talked about feeling secure and comfortable enough to show his scars. It only made him think of how many memories he had been thinking of within the last half an hour. She shared with him how she felt like he was the only one who he could truly be vulnerable with, and it made him feel so whole. “Vi,” he whispered in the same hush tone as her. “I’m really glad you feel so comfortable with me,” The hand which had just removed a strand of her hair caressed her cheekbone shortly. “I got so many scars and,” he didn’t really know how to finish his sentence and while he tried to find the words, he kept his eyes completely locked on hers. “I… I’m afraid that some of them is going to scare you away. Make you l-like me less if I’m not what you thought,” he said and licked his lips a little. Incredible how he had already was afraid to loose her.

Violet blinked a little when he started to speak. Telling her that he had so many scars. So did she, sadly the tale she had just told him of wasn’t the only one. But she didn’t say anything, because he was opening up to her, even if he wasn’t telling her anything specific, he told her that he had them. Her hand glided around his overarm and gave it a small squeeze. She pushed herself up a little, balancing on her lower back and one arm. She placed a hand against his cheek when he told her that he was afraid that he was going to scare her away. Or maybe even like him less if he wasn’t what she thought. “Zadkiel” she whispered again turning his head towards her. “We met in therapy you fool” she said with a slight smile on her lips, “I know what I walked into, and there is nothing, and I mean, nothing that can scare me away” she whispered letting her hand fell down again. But her hand on his arm stayed. “I think I might even like you more, because the scars that you have, and the fact that you are still here, breathing, functioning – I think that is really incredible” she wanted so much to tell him that she loved him, but she whispered it in her mind. That she loved, very much. “I know that you’ve been abused, I didn’t run away, I stayed. I know that your girlfriend left you, and you’re still living the same place that you bought with her, I’m still here” she let out a soft breath “I know that there is a lot of troubles in your family, and you have many things that you struggle with, but it made me want to know you more, because I wanted to be the reason why you smiled, and I wanted to be close to you – nothing, Zadkiel, can scare me away. I’m here to stay” she whispered softly before leaning up and placing a soft kiss against the corner of his lips.

Her hand squeezing his arm a little comforted him. She turned his head towards her after she had spoken her name. His lips mirrored her smile as she called him a fool. Okay, maybe she was right, that she knew that he had his troubles when she approached him that first time almost a month ago. He pulled a little smile as she almost complimented him for still standing and functioning. It was almost like putting one hundred coins in a gum machine… You were going to receive a lot of gum. And by that, it was that she made him believe her, and he started to want to tell her everything.
She started to list the things that she knew about his traumas and that she still hadn’t left him. She wanted to be the reason why he smiled. Well, she had succeeded at that, and just her mentioning it made him smile a little wider. As she placed a soft kiss against the corner of his lips, he was tempted to let the three words spill from his lips.

“Okay,” he said as if he had been convinced of something. He got out of her embrace, up from the bed and pulled of the shirt he had put on before he had gone to open the door a while ago. Now, it wasn’t really supposed to be a show, but it was a little difficult to not accidentally flex some of the muscles. He sat down next to her. He pointed towards his left collarbone, “I’ve been shot by my first girlfriend, Noa,” he said, “Now, it's not a big deal. She… She was pressured and- I know it sounds really odd but we’re good. She’s good,” he said noticing he was rambling a little he pressed his lips together shortly. “Point is I’m very observant about changes in behavior? And with that said, I walked in on one of my sisters being abused in our former home, and shortly after my youngest sister accidentally killed a guy. My mom died which made my… My-not-dad-anyway take my youngest brother away from all of us and then my mother lives and-” He stopped for a moment, mostly because his speech was picking up pace and that he needed more air. “I’ve already told you how I’ve broken my hand plenty of times out of aggression,” He looked down at his thighs where he was picking at his fingers. He was trying to pick up the oldest trauma he had, “I had this uncle… Marc,” he said, looking up at her as he said the name. “He believed that I was too expressive and emotional, so-” he sighed and looked down at his hands. “He got violent,” he mumbled. He knew there was so much more he could probably explain, but somehow, these things were the most prominent in his memory as of right now. He looked towards her, hoping she didn’t feel that it was too much to hear. It was just like he had turned on the faucet and had trouble closing it. She was so easy to talk to, and when he talked to her, he didn’t feel pampered, but seen. He liked that.