I can't say the right things

It had been a quiet night, with some music, drawing, then some tv series. She had slowly fallen asleep on the couch while wathing some documentary about animals and then drawing them in a cute looking way in front of her, on the stone looking wood table in front of her. She slowly came to herself, when she heard the bell from her door, before yawning and then moving the blanket she had over herself. She looked at her door for a moment, before looking at the clock. " Who could it be at this hour? ". She walked over to the door, before pressing the button. When she heard the name Charles, she looked at the speaker almost stunned for a moment. She could not believe that it was actually him, but then again, she could instantly recognise the voice. After a long pause, she finally spoke " Charles?, yeah i remember, come in ". She pushed the button, so it would make a sound downstairs, before looking at the windows, where rain was hitting it rather hard. * What are he doing outside in this weather? *. She turned around, before walking over to her door, opening it and taking a shoe to hold it open, before going down the stairs, in her big grey shirt, that just covered under her behind, but she had grey matching nightwear shorts under, and in white socks. She looked at him with surprise, before seeing his bloody knees. " Charles! ". She hurried down to him, before helping him inside, if he wanted to lean on her for support. She noticed how wet he was, but also how intoxicated he was.

She wasnt going to ask how or why, well.. not for now at least. She helped him up in her apartment and closed the door after them before moving him further inside the apartment. The apartment was layed in two floors. She guided him inside to her bedroom where it was warmest, before she hurried to her bathroom, right next to the big bed. She took a big white towel and a small for his hair, before she hurried back to his side. " Charles.. what happened. Why are you walking around outside, so late.. in this kind of weather ". Her voice soft and gentle, and her expression showing concern for him. She gently started to dry his hair, before looking down at his knees. " Wait here ". She walked out to the bathroom again, before coming back with some wet wipes, and a first aid kit. She placed it at the beds end, before sitting down in front of him, slowly kneeling, looking at him with her big brown doe eyes, into his blue eyes. " How did you even find me? ".

She tilted her head a little to the side, while looking at him, waiting for a reply, before slowly taking a wipe. " It´s properly gonna hurt so.. ". If he would let her, she would start to clean his wounds. If he had let her, she would look at the clean wounds before saying. " I dont know if my healing powers would hurt you.. taking that you are a demon and all.. ". She didnt want to make him feel more pain, than he already looked to be in. She slowly sat down besides him, looking at him with concern for his well being. She had never been near anybody that had taken anything or drank themself so drunk, so this was a very first for her. " Are you hungry?, thirsty?, is there anything i could get you? ".

She could see that he was having a struggle, but she didnt know if it was also internally or just an outside struggle, trying to control ones body, when someone had gotten a little too drunk, but then again, she also didnt even know if he was drunk or on drugs? or even both.. or maybe none at all. She looked at him with concern, before saying, when he asked why she was helping him. " Because that´s the least i could do.. after you made food for me ". A little smiled formed over her plump lips, before she looked at his knees, still trying to debate with herself, if she should use her power or not, but she ended up not doing it, because she was scared of the following things that could happen to both him, but properly also herself, from helping a demon, but then again.. she started to care less and less for if something happened with her, for hanging with all the wrong people in gods eyes. " And because you are a good person Charles, thats why i´m also helping you, and dont you dare to argue with me on that part. You helped your friend, now let me help you ".

She got a feeling, that he didnt normally got help from others, not on his own accort, so to see him here, in front of her.. not directly asking for her help, but kinda?.. that freaked her out a little, cause she had always felt like an outkast and now?, was she suddenly someones rock to lean on?. When he suddenly sat op, she looked surprised at him, especially when he took a hold of her hands with his, so hers were between his.. feeling his cold hands, mixed with a dampness to them, from the rain. When he suddenly blurted out that she talked too much, she looked at him with an apologetic expression and eyes, before looking away from him, parting her lips for a moment, as to say something, but stopped.. when she suddenly heard his words, which made her look rather shocked at him, because she had never guessed that his quick on the line mouth, would ever say something like that to her. She could see the water in his eyes, glazing them almost, and she had also heard the tone of his voice, sounding almost pleading to her, making her heartstrings pull even more, so she could feel the pain inside.

She nodded, before looking at him, feeling how he rubbed him thumb over the back of her hand. Slowly she leaned closer to him, still on her knees in front of him, so he could lean against her with his head, if he wanted her shoulder as support. " I´m actually.. kinda happy to see you.. not in this state, but.. i dont mind.. ". She could feel the hair stand on edge at her neck, seeing as he was so close to her, almost feeling his breath against her skin. " I.. moved to this apartment not that long ago.. and since moving here, i felt like i lost touch of everything and everyone, as if i was in this bubble and no matter what i said, it was never the right thing.. like everyone couldnt hear me clearly, or misunderstood my words, making me even doubt if i was ever gonna be worth something in this word, something for anyone.. as if i would ever fit in again ". She could feel how all those feelings she had inside, was pouring out.

She didnt know what else she should talk about, but she kept talking, how she dropped out of school because of her parents dead, but she didnt go into detail about it.. or how she had felt betrayed and played with, by someone named Ellery, and how she had gotten yelled at, by his brother.. how fucked up she had felt, until.. " Until i met you Charles. At first i will admit, you totally gave me a fucking fright... but.. you looked at me, as only me.. you even asked me, a complete stranger, if i wanted to help you with someone you treasured and still hopefully treasure so much.. as family. It made me feel alive, feel noticed, feel wanted again.. ". She looked at him with tears starting to form i her eyes, but a smile over her lips, before she waited to hear, if he wanted her to talk more. " So please, whatever you may need, i will be there for you ".

She looked puzzled for a moment, of the words he spoke, but also the way that he spoke them, the tone he held over his sweet voice, and how he suddenly placed a hand on her cheek. She felt how he gently wiped one of her tears away, while she looked at him with her deep brown doe eyes, innocently but also confused, both of his words but also the sudden soft side he had to him, how he rubbed the back of her hand, touched her cheek. She tilted her head a little to the side, making her look more innocent but also with a cute kinda look over it, still with the ever confused expression dominating her face. " Then we are two.. that are not welcome in this word ". She could feel with him, for him.. follow his words. She was quite surprised and let out a little squirk, when he suddenly embraced her in his arms, so tall he was, that she only reached his chest, but not even quite almost.

The strong smell of alcohol hit her like a wall, but for now, she didnt mind.. as she felt his warmth against her skin, how hes breath made her neck hair rise slightly, and how he burrowed his face in the nape of her neck, making her slightly blush on her cheeks, with a redness to it, that was easily visible. She didnt know what to say or do, so for now.. she just embraced him back, feeling the his muscles under her hands, how strong he actually felt. The long back of his, but she didnt let her hands travel. When he asked to stay, she was quite surprised, thinking about her first offer to him, when she was about to drive away.. how they had said goodbye. She would have never thought, that she would end in this kind of situation. " Of course you can stay Charles.. for as long as you need. And you will never be a nuisance ". She meant her words.. and just the feeling of his skin, the feeling of his breath, and him being there, even if he was wet and cold to the touch.. she didnt mind at all.

She let go slowly of him, before looking into his beautiful blue eyes, with a slight smile over her plump lips, before saying in a sweet and soft tone of voice, with the dominant french accent, that made her voice so much more feminine to listen to. " So, what do you say.. if i make a warmt bath for you, in the tub? ". She slowly stood up, before looking at Charles, giving his hair a soft and brief touch, as she was almost petting him, or caressing him, to say that she was there, and would be there for him, even when he said that she couldnt give him what he needed. She walked out to the bathroom, before opening for the water to the tub, so he could warm up slowly. She looked out to him between the hole in the wall, where a hologram looking fire was burning between the two transparent glass walls on each side. She then put some bathsalt in, just so it could linder, but not smell of anything. Normaly it would smell of vanilla, like she did herself right now, but she didnt think that Charles would approve of smelling like her. " The water is set to a timer, so when it sounds, its ready for you.. and the water will automatic stop running, sooo.. yeah ". She smiled slightly, before walking over to him, sitting softly down besides him, while she looked concerned at him. " Should i try to find something you could wear? ".

She stood up again, before walking over to her closet looking for something, before she found a big and long grey fluffy robe, one she used every winter, it was very long and big, way too big for her, so it would properly fit Charles greatly, also because it was originally made for men, but she loved to snuggle up in warmth fluffy stuff. She took it out and walked over to the bed, before laying it down at his side, before sitting down again, leaning back a little and giving herself support with her arms, while looking at the television in front of them both. Visible, because the curtain wasnt shut in front of it, but only the windows. She looked to her side, before taking the remote and then switching some calming indie music on. " Just say if you want to hear something else ". It was only music, calming, almost like rain, but just with instruments. She loved to listen to it, whenever she painted or sketched. She couldnt help but look at him from time to time, hoping that what she did was enough for him, but then again, he had said that she shouldnt shut up, so her walking around doing stuff, could maybe also take his mind off, from whatever had happened. She slowly sloped down into the soft bed, before laying besides him, with the big grey shirt traveling upwards her thights and stopping before it revealed her underwear. She looked at the ceiling, before saying. " What´s your favorite color? ".