Like a broken record - Dinah

He always did this whenever he had that he had wronged her. Showing up at her door with a present of some sort, with something that she liked. He had picked white tulips this time, happy flowers for his grave mistakes. He knocked on her door and felt his heart was beyond heavy as he waited. He knew that bringing her these presents always gave away what had happened, but he felt the need to anyway. When she opened the door, he looked at her with sad eyes, ready to grab the door in case she wanted to close it again. He looked at her and shook his head, "Mon cheri," he begged in a vulnerable voice as he exhaled deeply.

She sat on her bed, reading one of the books for her homework but not really paying much attention to the pages. Something was off and it was like the darkness around her whispered it to her. She shook her head and sighed. Then she heard the knock at her door, placing the book down on her bed as she moved to the door. She opened it carefully and her eyes flickered with emotion as she looked at him, her face staying stoic. Dinah tried to slam the door on him, but he stopped her and she felt her hand shake as she looked at him. She knew what flowers meant, because she loved them so much. Hell had none of this, and she had loved going to earth and seeing these things grow only to rot later. ”What do you want?” she said trying to hide her emotions, but it was clear she was already hurting. It was always like this. She loved him, and knew she would end up forgiving him, but every time she felt her heart break more.

He saw the emotions in her eyes and it hurt him to see her that way. He was quick to grab the door as she tried to slam it, staring at her as he felt so shameful for what he had done. But he couldnt help it, he was naturally charming and lustful, it was just how he was. He couldnt ever change that, but one thing was certain. Despite what he had done, his heart only belonged to her. Nothing could change that, and that was why he'd show up every time, to repent for his wrongdoing. Her words made him exhale deeply as he shook his head at her, "To remind you that my heart only belongs to you," he said in a sad tone as he held a firm grip on the door before he walked in, pushing her back if he had to. He closed the door with his foot as he shifted between her eyes. "I know I keep hurting you, over and over with being what I am," he said as he laid the flowers on a nearby surface, turning his head back to her. "You dont have to keep forgiving me," he then said as he carefully placed a hand on her cheek, the other on her shoulder.

Dinah knew why he was there because he always did this. As he stepped in she felt her face betray her, showing how hurt she truly was and shaking slightly as she looked at the flowers being placed down. His words hit her deep and she looked away. It wasn’t his being that was hurting her, but he still didn’t see it. As he placed his hand on her cheek and one on her shoulder she looked up at him seperating her lips as she tried breathing herself to a calmer emotion. ”How would you feel if I ever let anyone but you touch me?” she whispered. Never had she been with anyone but him, because he was all she needed. Of course there had been suiters, people trying to court their way to her heart, but it was being kept safe by her brother. ”What if someone else made me moan like you make me? Touched my body like only you do?” she asked, knowing that he would hate it. ”You are acting out and I fear it’s because you don’t feel I’m enough anymore,” she whispered her shoulders trembling. She wanted to cry, but it would fix nothing. It wouldn’t give them a solution.

He looked at her with hurtful eyes at her whisper. If the tables had veen thrned, he would have found the person and ended tgeir life, without hesitation, just thinking about someone touching Dinah in tge way he touched her was enough to make him frown deeply and the anger shining behind his sad eyes. She continued and he knew she was striking out, painting pictures in his head that would set him off in a rage. But he wouldnt let his anger out on her, he could never bring himself to do that. “I’d kill them, you know I would,” he said in a low tone as his thumb caressed her cheek.
Her last whisper made him look at her with confusion as he shook his head. “Dinah,” he said in a numb tone that gave away how vulnerable he felt in the moment. “Coming to earth has made my urges stronger, far beyond belief. But to hear you say, even think that you’re not enough,” his thumb stroke her cheek, “It’s paining me beyond belief,” he said in a low tone, looking away as he gulped. He shifted between her eyes. “These girls that I’m with? They’re all meaningless, moments that come to pass” - “I never touch them the way I touch you, I never fill them to the brink with my liquid, I never kiss them or let them feel my mouth on them. I keep that part of me for my one true love. For my cheri, the only girl that will ever have my heart,” he said as he pulled her closer, letting his lips be only a few milimeters away from hers. “I love you, and I will always only love you.”

Dinah didn’t doubt his words, but she felt angry. Angry at the fact that she gave all of her to him and he found satisfaction elsewhere. His excuses where only that; excuses. Her eyes found his as he was stroking her cheek and her jawed clenched. He started talking about them. Those vile creatures that he had chosen over her time and time again. When would the last straw be pulled? When would he realize that for every time he did this she was drifting further away from him. He pulled her in, but she felt no comfort in this moment, and she wouldn’t let herself. She felt his warm and sweet breath on her lips, his light scent of lavender drawing her in everytime. ”What do you want from me then? Am I supposed to sit by while you corpulate with your little hores?” she said in a whisper. ”I love you, I have given you everything, holding myself away from any suitors and for what? Having my love finding comfort in another person’s body?” she said, pulling out of his embrace and walking over to the white tulips. It’s petals so pure that she felt like she could see the contrast between them and his actions. Maybe she could never satisfy him, maybe he just held on to her because he felt like it was a comfort for him. ”I was made for you and you were made for me,” she said, touching one of the petals that soon turned black with rot. ”We shared a womb, shared everything and now you come to me, speaking about those … Those …” she couldn’t even call them lovers. She wouldn’t. She took a deep breath as she watched the rot moving from the former white petal down the stem. ”You say you love me but how do you hurt your love like this?” she said looking at him, tears in her eyes.

He knew she was right and he was in the wrong but he couldnt tell her that. He was too filled with his pride to admit that. But what did she want him to say? Tell her that he was weak against his urges, that the lack of their lovemaking was taking a toll on him? He knew that whatever sentence he thought of, it would hurt her none the less. He shook his head with a confused expression as she stated that he sought comfort in them. “I dont gain comfort, just relief. I only find my comfort in you and your body,” he assured her, watching her go to the flowers after she had pulled out of his embrace.
“Dinah please,” he said as he shook his head at her words. “It was never my intentions to hurt you, and you know that deep inside,” he said in a clear tone as he felt hos eyes water as soon as he saw her teary eyes. He stepped closer again, placing his hands on her arms, “I am the world’s luckiest man, I’ve been brought into this world with the woman who will hold my heart for eternity,” he looked down amd clenched his teeth. “But all this secrecy, hiding who we truly are to the world. It’s frustrating,” he then said as he looked back up at her with sad eyes, “When did we last strengthen our connection? Hmm?” He asked her but not to put guilt on her, but because the mere thought of it pained him.
Without saying more words, he pulled her close again and gently pressed his lips to hers. His hands locked around her body and before he broke up the kiss, he had leaned down and picked her up from the floor. “I know you’re hurting. Let me heal you. Make you forget about them. They’re meaningless compared to you,” he said as he let his soft lips dance around her neck, not sure what reaction it would spark, but he was hoping for a good one. “I want to repent for the hurt I’ve put you through,” he said as he moved his eyes up to hers.

His pleading was reaching her, and she was maybe too forgiving in nature. It was though staying mad at her love, even for the infedelities he had committed. She knew it was in his nature, but she also knew that if the tables had turned, her lovers might not be left unscathed. He walked closer again and she already longed for his touch. His hands on her arms made her look to him, his words burning into her heart as he spoke. As he looked away and confessed his frustrations she placed a hand on his cheek. She knew they were both hurting, but a normal life on earth was not easy. ”And don’t you think I feel that frustration too?” she whispered. His question made her swallow. The last time was the first day of school, weeks ago. She knew he craved sex, that was what his being was made to do, but he had done nothing to come to her when his needs arose. ”When did you last decide to come to me first instead of finding another?” she asked back. She might feel guilty for not having the time, but he had never once come to her with his needs since that day, so what was she to believe? He pulled her closer, locking their lips and she tried fighting it at first, but his lips was what she always craved. He pulled her tighter, holding her in place before ending their kiss and she let out a sigh. He picked her lightly off the ground and his words made a shiver run down her body. She closed her eyes, enjoying his lips so warm and inviting. He wanted to repent. She looked him in the eyes, conflicted, because she knew that it would also satisfy his needs.

”If you truly want to repent, then you’ll have to show me I can trust you,” she whispered. It was hard not falling into his being, wanting the closeness only he could provide her with. She gestured for him to sit her down, knowing he would have to oblige. When her feet was once more on the ground she took his hand, looking at the back of it. ”I know I have been absent, but you also know of my destiny,” she said before looking back at him. Dinah had told him in secrecy what she was meant to one day unleash on the world. She was one of the four horsemen, bringing the apocalypse with it but Lucifer had given her a mission on top of it. ”I am searching for the lamb, the one who will become the breaker of seals and make everything possible,” she whispered looking at him with tender eyes. ”I am doing it for us, Eaden; We’ll create a better world, one were no-one can stand in our way of our love and need for each other,” she said in a sad tone.

Guiding his hand down under her dress he would feel she was wearing nothing underneath. ”Imagine a world were you can have me anywhere you want, where we can be connected without anyone holding us back,” she whispered, guiding his hand around the bottom of her abdomen.

He knew she was frustrated as well. It was an annoying situation, but she was right to claim that he hadnt exactly been doing well in finding her first. He sighed deeply and looked into her eyes, "If I came running all the time, we would have been found out, you know that," he said with a sad tone as it didnt exactly excuse his behaviour. But he had respected that she wanted to keep them secret, so when the time came for his needs, he had been hesitant to go with her, which had ended up in him finding others. Not that he had enjoyed that as well as he would have if he had gone to her, he hadnt. Nothing could compare to the feelings she made him feel, no one could ever even get close to that.
Even as she fought him, he wasnt going to let her off, forcing her to indulge in the kiss with him, letting her feel that he wanted her this bad. The first kiss had been slightly sour at the remembrance of his crimes, but the second had been more lustful. Her softness making his core spin, her closeness drawing out his breaths to heavy needy ones as he shifted between her eyes as he held her up in his arms, his hands secured around her thighs to hold her as close to him as he could. Her whisper made him frown in shame but his eyes stayed on hers, his head moving in the motion of a nod. He was going to fix this, show her that she was the only one that mattered to him. He let her down as she gestured for it, feeling her hand around his.
He sighed at her words, closing his eyes for a bit as he remembered what she had told him. He opened his eyes as she started explaining. A better world where they could be free, such a fragile promise to make. He could hardly truly believe it, but he also knew the power that she bore, giving him a slither of hope that it would be true. Her image of the perfect world made him exhale in a tremble as he closed his eyes to imagine it, feeling his hand being placed under her dress, her soft skin against his fingertips making his blood rush through his body with immense force. He opened his eyes and felt her guidance as he shifted between her eyes, "If you're doing this, thinking that's the only way I could make you trust me, then I dont want it," he said, but it wasnt a rejection in that sense. He placed his free hand on her neck and looked deep into her eyes, "Only if it's because you want me," he then said, as he leaned forward and placed a tender kiss on her lips. When he broke the kiss off, he gritted his teeth as his lust was already going at a greater pace than anticipated, his hand slightly trying to break free of her guidance till he reminded himself not to be selfish. "You're all that matters to me. I couldnt be happy without your love," he whispered against her lips as he ran his thumb over her skin.

”If you came running to me you know I would gladly give my everything to you, even if it meant getting caught,” she whispered. She didn’t want to be judged in this world by who she loved, but earth had such a narrow sight at what love could and should be. Why was their love not alright? It was the only thing she needed to know that everything would be alright. Their love was all she needed. His lips tasted so wonderful but at the same time she wondered if he kept his words true. Had none other than she tasted his lips? ”I’m doing this because no matter what I long for you, dear brother,” she whispered in a sad tone. She looked him in the eye, watching the grey green color that she knew from her own reflection. His warm hand on her neck made her sigh and she tried to focus, but him being near always had such a strong effect on her. ”You’ll never lose my love, not when I made a promise – unlike you I don’t need anyone but you,” she whispered. She knew the last part might be mean, but she still hated that part of him. The part of him that she couldn’t control, but at the same time she loved it so dearly. It was the side of him that always surprised her with his gentle touch and loving words.

”I love the flowers,” she whispered, looking at the one flower she had made decay, but the rest of the buquet was still lovely and white. Pure. Her eyes found his again pulling him into a gentle kiss. She couldn’t help herself. Her heart belonged to him, so denying herself his touch was like pure torture. ”I love you, Eaden,” she whispered with a sigh as their lips parted. Maybe they were both in the wrong about this. She knew he had a craving and she hadn’t made it easy for him. Hiding she felt was the better option, but she wondered if it meant they would drift apart further. This earth had already proven to want to tear them away from one another, and maybe she should just stay quiet. Endure what may come as a result of them hiding. She placed a hand over his, pressing it closer to her skin. ”And you know that I will always be there for you, but everytime you are with another I want you to think of our bond as a tapestry,” she said. ”Every person you enter will remove a string from the tapestry – sure, it might not look bad at first, but at some point the tapestry will lose it’s image,” she said in a serious voice. If he kept doing this, she wouldn’t be able to keep this up, even if her body craved him, the thought of him with someone else made her heart hurt so much.

”Yes you would. And you would hate it afterwards when everyone’s judging us. I just couldnt do that to you,” he said in a sad tone. He felt a slight relief at her words but couldnt shake of the sad tone that she bore with the words. It sounded more like a curse than something good. Her whisper made him smile in a sad smile as he knew he deserved the mean words. His hand caressed her face with such gentle motions. He looked to the flowers as she said she liked them. His hand slowly wandering down to her sweet spot as their lips met. Her whisper sending sweet shivers down his spine. He wanted her so bad.
The image she painted in his head made him look away with shame. He wanted to promise her that he could manage, that he could uphold their promise with every aspect of his body. His eyes turning back to her, told another story - This was the way he was, changing it would be nearly impossible. He closed his eyes for a bit and when he opened them with a trembling sigh unwillingly escaping his lips, his eyes were watery. “Dinah. My heart will always belong to you. You know that,” he paused and took a moment to swallow his sadness, his eyes darting away as he stared into nothing. “But I am what I am,” his eyes went back to meet hers. “I dont even know what I am doing until it’s over. I’m blinded by that side that just craves bodies, crave ravaging and defiling,” he shook his head and took a step back, disgusted with himself at his words. “It’s all so natural, flirting, lusting, fucking,” his tone broke mid sentence and he glanced at the flowers. He suddenly hated them, hated them for always being his choice to try and fix this.
He took a deep inhale, running his fingers through his hair as frustration was written all over his face. “If I could stop, I would. Then I wouldnt have to bring you these flowers and hurt you over and over,” he stared at the flowers, feeling a tear run down his cheek. He shook his head and sniffled as he dried his nose, “You’re my soulmate, and no one could ever take that from you, never,” he gritted his teeth a bit and took a step back, feeling so filled with anger all of a sudden. “Fucking someone is one thing. I never care about those I fuck,” he said trying not to sound as angry as he felt, but it was hard. But he had worked himself up to this point. He had had his eyes away from her, but now he looked at her with a confused expression, “Love on the other hand. Making love to someone that I care for, the one person I care for,” he stepped closer as his tone got more vulnerable. “That’s what really matters to me,” he stopped in front of her but didnt touch her. His eyes shifted between hers before he exhaled. “You matter to me,” he whispered, feeling a tear trickle down his angry yet confused face.

Dinah knew she was being mean, but she was not the one who had found satisfaction with someone else. Even though she was being mean she wanted to comfort him at the same time. She could never understand the need he had, but she had always tried to meet them all, giving even her most tired body to him to his pleasing. Him stepping away, made her stand still for a while and she didn’t want to interrupt him as he spoke. Listening to his side was always something she did. Seeing him cry made herself cry, it was just a natural reaction. They were so deeply connected that at times she wondered if he could feel her sadness too. He spoke of love and she reached out, but took her hand back, wanting to hear him out before giving him the satisfaction of her touch. Seeing the tear fall down made her swallow as she reached out, sweeping away the tear with a gentle thumb and she stepped closer to him. Wrapping her arms around him in a tight embrace. ”I know,” she whispered, feeling her own voice breaking. She cried silently, letting her tears fall down, not caring about them as she pushed her head to look him in the eyes.

”Sometimes I wish things were simpler,” she said in a soft voice as she looked at him. ”But then I remember why our love is so strong, and it’s because it’s not simple,” she said, placing a small kiss at his chin that she could reach just by stepping up on her toes. ”I know you never mean to hurt me, so I am not blaming your intentions, but it’s the way you go about it that hurts me,” she whispered in a soft voice, taking a deep breath to calm herself down. She sniffled, brushing away his tears, cupping his face between her palms. When she looked at him she knew she could never live without him. She would never know anyone so completely devoted to her like he was, and she felt like she had been acting like an intitled brat. She took his hand. ”Promise me that you’ll never love anyone but me,” she said looking at him with serious eyes. He couldn’t promise her his body, but his heart was hers, and she needed his word on it.

Seeing her cry as he was crying made it much worse. He hated crying, it was always so annoying with the tears wetting his face, but seeing her cry made his heart ache, especially knowing that she was crying because he did. He looked at her hand that she was quick to retract snd gulped as he felt so empty without her touch. Finally getting to feel her skin against his, made him calm down, but a few tears still made their escape, despote his hatred for crying. He held her close as she wrapped her arms around him, like letting her go would mean that he’d die - Well it sure would feel like it, as it always did when he wasnt touched or near her.
“Our love has never been simple. Always someone against us and the way we feel for one another. Because we’re bound by blood,” he added, smiling at the kiss she placed on his chin despite the tears running down his face. But he still knew he had been in the wrong, no matter what she said, he couldnt be less angry at himself for being what he was. He closed his eyes and sighed as she brushed away his tears.
He looked at her and made a serious expression at her words. He knew she needed him to promise her, but hadnt he already shown her over and over that his heart ever only belonged to her? He squeezed her hand and pulled her into his arms, “I would never ever love someone else than you. You know that. You’ve felt it in our connection,” he said as he placed gentle kisses all over her face, pressing her tighter into his embrace. “I, Eaden Fayre. Promise with my soul and heart... That my heart will always only belong to the lovely Dinah Fayre. From the day we were born to the end of time,” he pledgef as he softened up in a smile and placed a tender kiss on her lips. “My sister and soulmate, my everything,” he whispered against her lips as he closed his eyes for a bit and took in her closeness. He sighed deeply and opened his eyes again to look at her. “I’ll try and keep my urges only for you. Because I know it hurts you to see me with someone else,” he said in a low tone as he pushed her down onto her bed, cupping her face in his hands as he looked at her. “Keeping you happy is my main priority on this damned earth,” he said as he made a sly smirk, running his hands down her neck and onto her shoulders. “Satisfy your every need... craving... desire..” for each pause he lowered himself till he was on his knees looking up at her. “So tell me what you desire,” his tone was low and lustful as he bit his lip softly looking deep into her eyes.

Dinah knew their love had never been simple, of course she knew, but she often wondered if it was a punishment. All the hardships and twists they had been through couldn’t just be coincidences, she thought. She couldn’t hold back a faint smile at his notion about blood. It was true that they were brother and sister, but Eaden was more than that. He was more than her love, brother and soulmate. It was like something even deeper connected them, a word that Dinah had never found a word for. She knew asking him for his promise might be stupid, and it was perhaps selfish, but she needed to hear those words. She chuckled lightly at his small kisses as she looked at him. Hearing those words meant more than anything. A promise like that he couldn’t run from. Even if she was the angel of death, she always felt so much more alive with him by her side, touching her gently and making sure that the world could not touch her. ”And I Dinah Fayre, promise with my very being, to continue to love and forgive you; like I’ve done since birth and until eternity runs out,” she whispered back. She knew she didn’t have to promise this, but it would remind her that she had something to upkeep as well. His warm lips against hers made her forget everything for a short while, her eyes still closed as he whispered against her lips. Feeling his scent of lavender so close to her was so alluring and comforting at the same time. He pushed her down on the bed with such ease, but mostly because she trusted him so deeply. She looked at him and spread her legs for him, her lips lightly seperated. ”I desire only you, dear brother,” she whispered breathlessly as she looked at him.

//Out<33//