Maybe I should have called

Date | 6th of February
Time | Around 4pm
Weather | Grey clouds and cold
Place | Elisabeth’s hut in the woods
Attire | Outfit

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If anyone would meet Lara, or Aurora as was who she was legally known as, now. No one would actually believe it was her, the smile on her lips as a laugh left her shaking her head a little. “Well, I still say that it was the greatest thing to see you put Walter in its place” she hummed, not able to put it out of her mind, how this small woman could roar at her own Alpha if he stepped out of line with her. She quite liked that, that she didn’t let herself get pushed around like that. She hoped that one day, she could be like that too. Gentle and caring, but still able to let people now that she wasn’t to be pushed around with. But with everything else, it seemed like something that came after it had happened a little too many times.
Lara looked down at the paper she was drawing at. Sitting in Elisabeth’s kitchen waiting for the next batch of cookies being ready in the oven.
“So, has anything interesting happen lately?” she asked, looking up giving the small woman a soft smile. It was still extraordinary for her to believe that she could have ended up such a good place. After everything that she was going through, she finally felt like she belonged somewhere. Even though she had once again had met JJ, she had tried to stay clear of him. Mostly because she had no idea what he truly wanted. Scared that he might still take her back to his mother. Besides, she was starting to like Nick, which also made her scared. Because what would JJ do, if he figured that out? Then she would just put him in danger. She couldn’t do that.
A little conflicted, she took a sip of her water, and started drawing again.

Elisabeth laughed with Aurora, who thought it joyful to watch her put her ‘older brother’ on his place. Yes, he was her alpha, but there was simply just something with the relationship between them, that made it her, who put the foot down, which, to some extend made her more of an alpha and him more of a beta. But she was comfortable with the spot she had right now, and she didn’t feel like fighting for anything. Elisabeth however was also much older than Walter, had had some more experience and she didn’t want to take all the harsh decisions – she just had her opinions that somethings shouldn’t be messed with.
Elisabeth had her eyes a little on the oven, keeping an eye on the batch to make sure that the cookies weren’t done before due. She hated overcooked cookies. She looked up at Aurora as her glad voice was heard. “For me? No, not really,” she said and shrugged a little. Her life was quite the same. “The most interesting might be whenever I witness a first transformation between the pups,” she laughed. She looked towards Lara’s eyes, “You might be the most interesting thing that has happened as of lately,” she confessed with a caring smile. She licked her lips as she noticed how Aurora looked down to continue to draw, “But you met someone, correct?” she almost mused and carried an interested smile.

Lara chuckled a little when Elisabeth told her that nothing of interest had happened. Or, despite some of the younger children in the pack was starting to have their first transformation. That would make them what, fourteen years old? It was still so weird for her, to be in a well-functioning pack. A place where she felt accepted and most of all, where she was loved. Even though she still had a couple of incidents where she had taken things the wrong way and had acted out. Or she had been scared of something where she didn’t need to be scared.
She looked up when Elisabeth pointed out that she had met someone, a small tug of her lips and the tint of red that started to form in her cheeks, was more than enough confirmation. Not that she would say it in so many words. “What do you mean? I’ve met a lot of people” she mumbled, as her fingers started playing around with some of her black hair that had fallen out of her hairdo. “Since I started at the academy and all that” she added, trying to talk around the fact that she knew that Elisabeth meant Nick.

Elisabeth picked up on everything from the hidden smile, the warmth in the cheeks, to how her heart beat just a tiny bit faster and how her emotions were almost colored the color of pink skies. Elisabeth hummed, clearly showing that they both knew who Elisabeth was trying to talk about. “Yes, of course, a lot of people,” she almost mused and let her eyes rest on Aurora for a moment. She leaned over the kitchen Island and placed both elbows in front of her, to let her hands cup around her face. “So, what is the persons name?” she wondered a little teasingly. Elisabeth had taken care of so many kids besides from Aaron. Even though Aaron was immune to her abilities, she had learnt to read people without the ability, which was also why she had learned to read Aaron to perfection. She knew how everyone would act when they got a crush or something grander.

Lara pursed her lips together, trying to keep away the smile that tried to form on them. Looking up, her deep dark eyes met Elisabeth’s slightly lighter colour. Trying to calm herself for a moment, she breathed in and out. “Nick” she whispered, almost afraid that if she said the name out loud, she would realise that everything around her was a dream. Because it felt like it, even though so many horrible things had happened over the course of four years. It had brought her to this moment, where she was sitting in the kitchen, and someone was baking for her. Where she could do homework, and someone would be interested in hearing how her day had been. If she was being honest, even though she had loved her family. Her mother and father, her sisters. There had never been this kind of bond that was found in the Shaw pack. It was something that she still needed to get use to. “It’s actually a little weird, he is the son of a rouge female werewolf, but he is an alpha? I don’t think he even understands what he really is” she mumbled, putting a few more lines on her painting. “He is cute though” she finally admitted with a cheesy smile on her lips.

Elisabeth smiled wider when she noticed that Aurora tried to hide her smile. Teenage love was so cute. She raised her brows in excitement when she revealed the name. Nick. She hummed interested, “Nick you say,” she mused. Aurora then continued to explain his rank which made Elisabeth pull a thoughtful expression. She pulled a greater breath in while thinking, but her thoughts were interrupted by her description of how he was cute. “Well as long as he is cute, respects you and shows interest in you, everything should be fine, correct?” she whispered caringly, moving closer to Aurora to place a caring hand around her in a hug. “But his father might just be an alpha,” she explained while moving a strand of Aurora hair from the front of her shoulder to her back. Elisabeth sensed that Aleks was on his way, which made her exhale softly while looking at Aurora's drawing. “It's pretty,” she complimented before she walked back to the oven.

She nodded a little thoughtfully. In some ways Nick reminded her a lot of Howie. Always happy and outgoing. But he didn’t have the aura that pulled you in, he had the one of power and also some sense of protection. It calmed her, and she would be lying if she said that she wasn’t falling for him a little. Mostly because they could joke around. Even though they didn’t have any classes together, he helped her out a lot. Not that she really needed it, since she had been a third-year student before everything had happened with her parents.
Now she was buried alongside them. She had gone, seen her tombstone. Her old name, but she still couldn’t help but refer herself as Lara in her mind. It had after all been the name she had given at birth. The one her parents had chosen for her. Aaron had picked out Aurora, which might have been a day she had been so happy. Mostly because that had been the day, he had started to refer her as his daughter. She looked up and gave Elisabeth a soft smile and nodded. “Well, true, he doesn’t know his father, so” she shrugged, knowing that not all packs were built on mutual respect. “Thank you” she said a little bashful and cupped one side of her face as she kept drawing. Her eyes looked up as she could smell Aleks. “Shit” she mumbled, looking around in a panic. As a stupid resort she hid behind the counter. Pressed her back up against the cabinet, heart beating like crazy against her chest.

Elisabeth smiled approvingly as she explained that he didn’t know who his father was. Well, Elisabeth was almost certain that that would be the reason then. Nothing else would really make sense, would it? The thing that had left Elisabeth wondering however was why an alpha would be with a rouge, even if it was just for one night? She shook her head and pushed the thought away because she understood. She reminded herself of Rose and the rouge Neil.
Elisabeth looked over her shoulder as Aurora cursed, “What’s going on?” she wondered,  not really understanding exactly why the young shapeshifter acted up. She noticed how Aurora hid and walked towards her to see if she was okay.
The door opened, “Hello!” Aleks greeted out loud to announce his arrival, which made Elisabeth look up towards him.
“Hey honey, can you take the cookies out of the oven?” she requested which made Aleks look a little confused at first before he went and found some oven mittens and would put them on before he would move to the oven to take out the cookies.

Now of all the people she had expected to see today it would be Aleks. She looked up as Elisabeth asked what was going on. “I know him, from, from before” she tried to explain, knowing that Aaron had explained how he had found Lara, now Aurora. Not that Lara had kept it a secret, only from the new people in her life, as she wanted a fresh start. She knew people had mourned her. But to be fair, the old her was dead and she was trying to start a new life where she would like people not to know her old story. Were everyone still thought she had killed her parents.
She pressed against the counter; her eyes shut tightly as she heard his cheery voice announcing that he came in. Her hands found her face, but then she remembered that her drawing stuff and her phone was still where she had been sitting. She cursed at herself in her head, as she looked towards the table. As long as he didn’t look over there it would be fine. Right? Then her phone started buzzing. Fuck. Pressing her lips together, she kept herself sitting. Not knowing what else she could do right now.

“Was he mean to you?” she quickly asked before she straightened up to greet the human. Elisabeth watched Aleks while he took the cookies out and went to prepare a place for them to cool where he wouldn’t be getting too close to Aurora just in case, she really didn’t want Aleks to find her. Together with Aleks, she got the cookies onto a cool tray and almost as they were done the phone buzzed. Elisabeth immediately looked up with a sigh before she moved around Aleks to get to the table. “Those pups…” she mumbled.
Aleks laughed a little and took one of the hot cookies. “Well, if you don’t remind them of their things, who else would?” Elisabeth shook her head a little of with a wide teethy smile on her lips. She took the phone into her hands and carefully picked up the drawing. One could hear that Aleks took a bite of the cookie, because he immediately regretted it, huffing to make it cool down in his mouth, complaining a little. Elisabeth had thought about putting the phone and drawing away, but with Aleks little stunt, she put it back on the table and hurried towards Aleks. “You are so impatient!” she laughed and pulled him towards the bin, “Out,” she said, also as a hint for Lara that she could leave if she wanted to, but she had to be quick.

Why was she so scared to see Aleks? One, it reminded her about that day, a day she would like to forget. Even though JJ hadn’t really given her a chance to do so. If she just hadn’t met him that day. If he had just gone around thinking that she was still dead. Then everything would be much better. At the moment when he started speaking more than just a simple hello, she wanted to cry. Looking towards Elisabeth when she put her things away. Looking how she hinted that she could run out of she was fast.
She took the chance, and ran towards the door for the screened porch, and then out the door. She saw his car, that she had teleported into when she had stepped out in front of his car. An ability she no longer possessed. She ran around the house, not knowing if she had been fast enough in her run, maybe she had been a little load? Her hands grabbed a tree trunk and leaned forward. A chocked sob left her, tears that sprung into her eyes as she tried to fight the memories that kept coming back to her. Her death. How she had been used. At least now that she was no longer a virgin there wouldn’t be the same need for her. Not that she was sure that she could ever let anyone near her again. Damaged gods, that was what she was. No matter how she put a bow on it, or the help she got. The back of her hand, dried away a couple of tears, letting out a soft breath as her fingers glided through her black hair. Shit.

Aurora made a run for it, but it wasn’t near silent, which was why Aleks only just got to spit the cookie out and turn around to look at the long hair that left the house. “Who was that?” he exclaimed and started to move towards the door she had exited through. He had immediately been able to recognize her, even with the now long hair. But she was dead. He had even been laying flowers there. “A-Aleks wait,” Elisabeth called wanting each of them to take a little break. He walked outside and Elisabeth was quickly by his side, “Who was that?” Aleks said looking down at Elisabeth. She could feel the sorrow from both of them and wasn’t able to reply with a lie. He passed Elisabeth. A tear ran down as she could see why both of them were so upset. “She needs time,” she whispered, hoping he would listen, but he continued around the house. “Aleks!” she called.

Aleks saw how Lara was resting against a tree trunk. He ran towards her, and unless she ran away, he would wrap his arms around her in an embrace with tears running down his cheeks. “I’m so sorry. I should’ve done something. I should’ve done something,” he would whisper to her almost like a mantra. He had blamed himself for not having done more, even though he couldn’t really do anything else that what he had done.

She hadn’t thought that there would be any more tears left to cry. At some point it would have to stop. Right? But now didn’t seem like it would be the time. It had helped, finding people that wanted the best to her. To be long somewhere and start over. But no matter how far away she tried to distance herself. She would always end up in the same position, where she would meet someone that knew who she was. Especially since she had stuck around, she should have move she should have known that staying here would only rip up things she might not be able to mend again.
Everything had quiet down, she listened to her own heartbeat, how it thundered against her chest. Her breathing, shallow and unreliable. Everything just, faded away. Somewhere in the distance she could hear that Elisabeth called for Aleks. But it wasn’t until his arms found their way around her and pulled her towards him that she realised that he had followed her out. There were no words that blamed her, only blame on himself. For a moment, she had no idea how to react. So, she just stood there in his arms. Took in his scent. How it reminded her that he had for a night given her a place to stay somewhere, where she had felt safe. She would never forget that act of kindness. “You couldn’t have known” she heard herself say, as her arms slowly glided around his waist and she turned her head to bury it against his chest.

Aleks kept her in his arms, holding her tight, not wanting her to leave or teleport away, though there was something about her abilities that had changed. He just couldn’t concentrate on that right now. There were so many other things that was more important. The actual fact that she was alive. “I should’ve come,” he whispered with a sad voice. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered to her. He honestly couldn’t forgive herself for the fact that he hadn’t gone after the warlock and Aurora earlier.  He should’ve. But what would he have done? He didn’t know, but probably pick a fight with the bastard. He pulled her closer as her arms wrapped around him and she buried her face in his chest. He let one of his hands find on top of her hair. He could fell how soft it was. It was so long. He sniffled a little before he kissed the top of her head. “I’m so glad you’re alive,” he whispered. He was after all a good friend of his – and he understood. He understood that everything was difficult. He didn’t want to let go of her, he just wanted to hold her close and comfort both of them. It was also one of the reasons why Elisabeth didn’t get closer. She knew they had something to talk about, and even though she heard their conversation just fine, she didn’t want to intrude their personal space. “What are you doing here?” he whispered with a little more control of his sniffing.

There was something so incredibly comforting to feel Aleks arms around her. How he pulled her in, holding her tight as if he was afraid that she would slip through his fingers if he let go. How he told her that he should have come, and that he was sorry. Once again, she shook her head, but she couldn’t get any words over her lips, instead a choked sop left her instead as she pressed her eyes together, so hard that she started seeing small white spots floating around.
For a moment she was sure that this couldn’t be real. The way he comforted her, was something that had been far between. It only strengthened the still burning feeling in her heart for him. Which she hated, especially because he was once again in love with someone else. And the only reason he was standing here was because she was a friend, she just had to understand that. If her heart would just listen to the reasoning in her head.
“Aaron found me” she whispered, still with her head against his chest. “I did, I did die” she added, because she had. Someone had just thought that she deserved a second chance. “someone brought me back, but now everything has changed, I just needed… a fresh start, the plan was to run away when I got my strength back” brutal honesty, but with Aleks she had never really hid anything. “But, I found a home here – so now I’m part of this pack” she decided to end her explanation, closing her eyes again, letting the scent of him lull her into a state of feeling secure.

Aaron had found her – but she had died. At first he was about to ask questions, but he knew very well himself, that it was possible to get back to life. After all, he had been thrown back into his body even though he had been declared dead. She even explained that someone had believed that she deserved a second chance. It was almost like someone was throwing around with his stomach. Everything had changed. He could feel that on her, with the ability that lied in her. He closed his eyes as she explained that she had been planning to run away as soon as she was strong enough. It tore his heart a little. She wouldn’t want people to know that she was alive. She didn’t want people to know where she went. Did she really feel that hated? He didn’t lessen his hug around her when she ended her story with telling that she was a part of the pack. “I’m sorry you died,” he whispered and felt how it stung in his stomach, as if someone put a knife in it and twisted it around. “I-… I want you to stay,” he told her. He already had a feeling that she was going to stay. “Elisabeth takes care of me sometimes,” he whispered, mostly to let her know what she should be looking into. Aleks wasn’t the person who didn’t visit Elisabeth, he was quite good at visiting her.

“Don’t say that” she whispered, because as amazing as it sounded coming from him. It also tore her apart. Why? Did you ever really get over your first crush? She wasn’t sure she ever would, maybe it was simply the idea that had been building in her head for so long. Knowing very well that it might be so much more different in real life. Fantasies were as often, much better in your own head where you control every outcome.
She titled her head back, looking up at him. “You can’t tell anyone else” she whispered letting the back of her hand glide under her nose. “My name is Aurora now, and Lara, Lara she is dead, okay?” she tried to make sure that he understood how important it was for her that he understood what she was saying. If she had been having her way, not even Aleks would have known that she was still alive. She could have lied and just told him that he had it wrong. Because of her ability change she knew that things weren’t the same around her, both in her aura and the way she smelled. She could easily pass as someone that just looked very much like her. But funnily enough, she couldn’t lie to him, which had been why she had tried to make a run for it. “Aleks, promise me” she almost begged at this point, letting her hands find each side of him just by his upper arm.

She told him not to tell her that he felt sorry that she had died. He couldn’t stop that. He would forever be sorry that she had died. Dying wasn’t pleasurable. It wasn’t relaxing. No, it was painful, and even if you had people around you, you felt alone. He remembered so clearly how people had gathered around him trying to keep him from dying, and how they all failed.
When she looked up at him, he made sure to look at her. He could see how red her eyes were from crying. He nodded slowly when she told him not to tell anyone. “O-okay,” he said though he had trouble following. Aurora. Lara was dead. It was heavy to hear. She asked him to promise her, and it was almost like a mental slap in the face. “Yes. Yes of course,” he said and blinked a little, “I promise,” he assured her, “I’m not telling a soul,” he spoke rather softly.

Her lips twisted a little, clearly not knowing if she should smile, laugh or just cry. So, instead the expression just disappeared, as if there had been no notion of it to begin with. She would love for things to get back the way it was, but there was no use for that. JJ once again knew she was alive, and this time she hadn’t been able to resist him ending up sealing the bond. She had felt sick afterwards, mostly because she knew that it had been the blood from the pureblood vampire doing much of the talking. In her heart she knew that most of JJ’s problems came from his parents, and if she had been someone else, she might even have the delusion that she could fix him. But she wasn’t sure she was the right person to that, or even if she wanted to. She wanted grand love, not obsession. Something she hoped she could get with Nick, someone that was pure and had her best intention forward.
“I should go” she whispered, feeling choked up, and just needed to get away. Get her thoughts together, figuring out what she wanted. Even though Aleks told her he didn’t want to leave, he also reminded her of the worst day of her life. She gave his arms a squeeze before she pulled away from him.

She wanted to go, he couldn’t really tell her no, because he certainly didn’t want to push her. Elisabeth stood ready to take Aurora into her embrace if she needed it Aleks would on the other hand give Elisabeth a nod and leave the women be. “Don’t be a stranger Aurora,” he told her before he would head away. He could come back another day or time.

She felt a lump form in her throat when he told her to not be a stranger, but then used her new name. Something about it just, it felt wrong, and it also felt like a piece of her died. She couldn’t really explain it, because it had what she had told him to. The same with not telling anyone about the fact that she was actually alive. It was hard to figure out what to do in a situation like this, in a way she hoped that no one else would find themselves in similar situation.
Lara saw how he walked away, before she slowly walked towards Elisabeth and let herself fall into her embrace. Tears followed quickly after, before it turned into outright pitiful sobs and cries. It was almost enough to swallow her whole, sink her down and knock all the air of her lungs, all at once. All the unresolve feelings that he always managed to bring up, and the day were she had died, and then also one of the best nights of her life the evening before everything had gone down.

Elisabeth was quick to let her arms wrap around the darling, who cried her heart out. She could feel how she felt like she was trembling and how something in her wasn’t the same. Almost as if she finally buried her former self for good, and it tore her apart. “I know,” she whispered to her. She had to remind herself that it wasn’t her own feelings, but Aurora’s. She herself had felt similar feelings before. Behind all of Aurora’s feelings, she could feel Aleks’ and how he felt so confused and surely just wanted to make sure everything was alright, but Aurora had told him she had to go – so there was no reason for him to stay, even though he wanted to. “You’re doing everything you can. It’s tough,” she caressed the sweethearts back. “He’ll understand,” she whispered.

It was nice to have people in your life, that clearly would be there for you. That would let you cry when you needed to and tell you that you were doing the best you could. It was still something she was getting used to, but it was also something that was slowly making her a better person and healing in a way she didn’t think was possible for her anymore. She wanted nothing more than to take Aleks by the hand and bake him something like she had done so many years ago.
They could joke around, talk about school and how Howie and Noa was doing. But right now, there was just too many emotions connected to it, she promised herself when she was feeling better, she would reach out, and they could talk. Just like they had done so many times before. But not right now.

Elisabeth wouldn’t loosen her grip around the shapeshifter. No, she had so much on her shoulders right now, and she needed a shoulder to cry on. She needed to collect herself and her thoughts, because clearly, she wanted to do so many things, but she wasn’t ready. Like Elisabeth had said, she needed time.
“It’s okay, darling,” she spoke in a hush voice. “You have to prioritize yourself, for a while till everything settles,” she comforted the girl and let her hand stroke the girl’s hair. “If you ever want to speak to him, you can always come to me or Aaron, okay?” she whispered caringly. After a while, and when it seemed like most tears were cried, or just silenced, she allowed herself to suggest: “Let’s get you inside and something warm to drink, hm?”

She nodded slowly, even though tears were still forming in her eyes. It was like there was no way for her to stop herself, just letting all the sorrow of it all escape her through physical means. She knew that she had to prioritize herself. But she had no idea how to do it, because it had been so long since she had even been able to do that. Hopefully with the help from Elisabeth and Aaron she could slowly get there, and not constantly thinking about running away.
“Yeah, that would be nice” she whispered, slowly getting out of the small trybrid’s arms and looked towards the house. Before she followed along and got inside. She could still smell Aleks, and it twisted in her heart, almost wishing she could run after him and hug him again. But she needed time, that was the first step. Then she would call him, when she felt like she was ready again. She walked over and sat down on the chair that she had been sitting on before everything had gone down. Her eyes puffy from the crying she just looked at her cold hands. What a mess.