Keep my head above water - Micah

It was hard. It had been a few weeks now. As far as she had thought, she wanted to among someone who didn't fear her ability. But even here, she felt like it was a waste of her ability. Felicity didn't get any emotional gain out of it, other than feeling worse. This didn't fix the whole in her chest, it made it worse if anything. She was walking around by herself on the southside. Not really a princess friendly place, but like always - bad luck didn't seem to come her way. Then she closed her eyes and sensed a familiar scent.
"I thought I made it clear I didn't want.. -" she opened her eyes and turned around to face Micah. She was dressed in this pair of black skinny jeans and a black crop top. Her light brown hair waved beautifully over her shoulder. Felicity breathed out, wasn't expecting to see him and it caught her off guard.
"Heard about the bad luck thats been happening here for the last weeks?" She asked. Again she tried to build up the walls and attack everything and everyone that came close. But Felicity was conflicted. She had never known where she belonged, or felt wanted for a long period of time by just one person. Of course her father loved her, and she was sure she could set the castle on fire - and somehow still forgive her. She would never understand the love parents had for their kids.
"I'm bad for you Micah.. can't you see that. I'm bringing everyone bad luck.. how long till I'm the reason someone gets hurt? I'm toxic.. you should just.. stay far away from me. I don't want to end up hurting you," she admitted. Fucking emotional Felicity still tried to scream out for love. "I don't want to be a shadow Micah.. I don't want to be Abigals little shadow anymore.. I want to be my own person.. nothing I ever have done, has been as good or bright as Abigal. I lost so much just to not get in her way..  giving up on so many things. I can't do that anymore."

Micah had followed Felicity. Not because he wanted to win her back, although that was still the plan, but because he was worried about her. A lot of bad luck had been happening in the area, and he thought it might be Felicity causing it. He was almost certain. He had a theory it was her way of handling things. He stopped when she turned to him. ”Why do you think I’m here,” he said and walked closer to her.
He shook his head at her statement. She was so wrong. ”The way I see it, I was in good luck until I screwed it up.” He took a deep breath. ”I’m not going to stay away. I will never go away. I’ll take my chances with you. Bring on the bad luck. You’re worth it to me.” He listened to her how she talked about being a shadow. He understood how that felt. He was still in his father’s shadow. Always being compared to how he did the job, and every little mistake pointed out, because his father would have known better. ”Then don’t do it. I don’t think people compare you to her, I think you do. And you don’t have to. You can be your own person, if you just choose to be. Step out of her shadow. Come into the light.” Micah walked even closer to her. ”I am here fighting for you, not Abigal. You know that day when everything went to hell. I would have sacrificed myself for you. For all of you, but when I thought I was going to die, it was you I wanted to talk to. You were the last person I wanted to see. So go ahead and push me away, build up those walls again, but I will never stop fighting for you.” He took a last step so they were close enough to touch each other. ”I love you so fucking much. I can’t give you up.”

Lavenders words haunted her mind, Soon, they'll come to regret giving her a higher value than you. You're worth so much more. But what was her goal really in life. What was their goals with her. Felicity slightly knew they were using her as to fill the void of their lost friend. Felicity rolled her eyes at him, when he said he had been in good lock until he screwed it up.
"So tell me, are you here on duty or is it because you actually care?" she asked a little harsh - but his little side job was the whole reason for this. Not that she should blame him or her family - she blamed herself. Felicity removed her eyes from him when he opened up about not staying away. She knew if she looked into her eyes, he would see her. You’re worth it to me, her head and her heart was fighting so badly at this point. She felt tense and like a bomb about to explode but not in anger. Felicity never cried, or it was a long time ago - and she wasn't going to make today the day. Or so she thought. He knew her enough to know, if something made her feel strong emotions she couldn't look up. Or she could, but she was cared to break when she hit the ground. And she didn't want to hit the ground. But he stepped closer and closer, and her eyes slowly moved towards his feet as he got closer. The last sentence made her take a deep breath in and lift her eyes up to look at him. A few tears left the corner of her eye to roll softly down her cheek.
"I hate you," she said looking at him so vulnerable, she shook her head. Clearly she didn't hate him. It wasn't the right words to say in the matter. But he made her feel all these things and she couldn't hold all of them. "Why did you have to make me fall in love with you?" Felicity looked into his eyes and exhaled before leaning in, pressing her lips against his.

Micah watched how she looked away from him. He why. She was feeling something strong, and looking at him would make him see her. All of her. She was scared about that. Being so open to another person that they would see straight into her soul and see all the parts, the ugly and the beautiful. Everything. He held his breath when she lashed out. He knew it would come, but it still hit him right in the chest, making him feel breathless. He exhaled. ”My duty stopped a long time ago,” he admitted. He might have been asked to keep an eye on her, but when he started to fall for, that all changed. He watched her. He wanted to know what to expect. It could still go either way.
Her tears broke his heart. If someone else had made her cry, he would just make sure that would never happen again, but these tears were because him, and it broke him. He swallowed when she said she hated him. He knew it wasn’t true, but it still hurt him to hear her say it. ”Because I’m selfish,” he said before her lips met his. He put his arms around her and returned the kiss. It felt like he had been under water for the last few weeks, and now he could finally get above the water to breathe. Now he just had to keep his head over water. He wanted her to forgive him, but he thought that might take a little more time. But he was okay with that, as long as he could still breathe.

He returned her kiss, and it was like all the voices that rambled around in her head turned silent. She wasn't drowning anymore. Her arms found their way over his shoulder and her hands locked themselves around his neck.  Felicity pulled herself closer to him. It was like she was afraid if she let him go, she would go back to the storm. But feeling this lucky at this point, lashed a huge wave of bad luck out around them - not effecting the two of them, but the people that might be close. She let her arms  slight down around his waist. Her lips escaped his, and she rested her head against his chest. She just needed to be held close. That was all she really needed. Felicity didn't need long speeches or fancy words - she just needed the closeness.
"I lied.." she whispered. "I don't hate you," she had to change the words she had spoken two seconds ago. She lifted her head up and looked him straight in the eye. Not something she was known to do.
"I love you Micah. I do.. I'm sorry for acting out," she said biting her lip softly. It was a version of her he had never seen before - but most likely a side he knew was under her thick skin. Perhaps there had been a good thing about Jayden falling into her way again, it had reminded her about one thing - she did have a heart, and even if she hadn't used it in a long time - it still worked.

Micah felt like everything fell into place. He had missed a part of himself without her. That night in the castle, she had taken his heart with her and kept it with her until now. He wasn’t going to let her go. He kept his arms tight around her. He put his lips against her head when she laid her head on his chest. He made a light laugh of her words. ”If that is how you hate, I’m okay with that,” he responded and moved his head when she moved to look at him. ”Don’t ever apologize for being you. I fell in love with all of you.” He wanted to see everything of her, and he knew there was still a lot he didn’t know. He couldn’t wait to see everything, learn everything about her. It was what he had always wanted. Someone he didn’t figure out in a few years but needed a lot of time to reveal themselves. He was not a fan of Jayden, but he did feel like all of this had brought him closer to Felicity. Before they were close, but it wasn’t like now. She was still holding back. Now she had allowed herself to fall, and he planed on catching her every time. He put his lips against her temples. ”God I’ve missed you,” he whispered against her skin. He had felt lost before, but it was usually because of something else. Last time was when Clem was poisoned. He never thought a love could make him feel so out of control of his own life. He was pride of his ability to take control of everything in his life, but with Felicity he had never had a choice. Falling for her was inevitable. He couldn’t have stopped if he tried.

"Oh I promise you. There is plenty of that," she gave him a little smirk. It was nice. Just being a person, and not act to all the walls and bricks she usually had to go through first. She rolled her eyes at his next comment, but not because she acted out on it - it was just a classic Mikaelson eye roll. "I don't hope you are expecting me to start apologizing.. it's not a part of the deal," she teased him a little. It was the thing about her, even in her vulnerable state, she was still her. He kissed her temple and she exhaled. Seemed to easy to breath out with him.
"I've missed you too - it's been quite crazy around here," she admitted. At least she had been in some luck. But would it be the last time she saw Lavender and Ramsay? She knew it would be in her bad luck to run into them, or perhaps not. Maybe she needed a little balance between knowing what she could do, and what she wanted to do in her life.
"Lets go home," she then said. South side wasn't really her territory and it would never be.

Micah smiled at her. Everything about her just made him happy. The smirk, the eye roll. He loved her so much. ”I would never expect that,” he said with a smile. He knew it wouldn’t be perfect, and they might have to work some things out, but he truly believed they could make it last. He watched her with a focus in his eyes. He only watched her. To hell with the rest of the world. ”We will face the craziness together from now on,” he paused. ”It won’t be the last time we have to deal with crazy,” he predicted. He didn’t know if Lucifer was coming back, but he would be ready if he did. He took his hand and walked towards the castle with her. ”We might need to fill in Abigal and Kyle, they have been worried,” he said with a smile. A few weeks ago, they had all been in a good place, they had been friends. Lately it had been a little awkward, as everyone was walking on eggshells around him. He thought it might have been the same for her. He looked at her. ”I never could have predicted we would end up together. I have never been happier.” Sure, he had been happy in his marriages, but they all ended in tragedy. He also thought he and Abigal would have been better off as just friends. He didn’t regret being with her, but it did bring them both more pain than they deserved. It also brought him Malia, and for that he would never change anything.