What Loneliness

LOCATION | The park area in Aston
DATE | May 2nd 2022
TIME | Midday
TOPIC FOR | @Sol xx


It had been a while now, or well the months didn't feel like anything compared to the amount of years he had lived. It was like seconds in a day, a long dreading day. Yet, he felt better each day, and it seemed like he was finally getting just a bit more trust from his family by any giving moment. At least most of them. Now, he had made his trip to Aston for the first time in months, it was long overdue, but there was so many things that had happened here in this part of town in February, it was believed to be hard, but once he had taken the first step here - it hadn't even been bad. Nothing compared to when he had stepped back to his homeland with his heart and how it had hit him.

Now he was just here feeling like he tried to survive 8000 years of trauma more or less, and he was doing wonders. So many wonders that he didn't stop and walked directly into a siren he happened to have seen before in the past. "Sol?" Now it was ages, really, ages since he had last seen her and mostly because well they had both worked at protecting some supernaturals against humans. In his case he had always held the vision to protect the werewolves from the hunters. "It's been a moment," Adonis exhaled, knowing the legacy of his brutal nature hang in every corner, not a reputation that were easy to shake off. "My apologizes, I wasn't looking where I was headed." he then apologized for having walking right into her without second thought.

One day took another. It was a constant turnaround of time where you weren’t sure where it all disappeared. She was, of course, making sure that everything was running smoothly at the dinner, which was more or less a way for her to make time go this quickly. Time. She had stopped and looked into a window she had passed. For a woman that had the ability to slow it down, make it go faster or just stop. She sure had no idea where it all went. A small sigh left her as she pushed some of her hair behind her ear. Was she starting to grow soft? Was the fact that she had begun hiring kids the reason why her scowl was more of a frown these days?
Then there was the fact that more hunters seemed to flock in the forests and around the places where supernatural groups had gathered in the past. But she was still waiting for her orders on what to do with them. She turned her body and was about to go on her trip to the shops to get some of the things they needed and hadn’t gotten with the last shipment of ingredients. Not that she got very far as someone walked into her. A groan left her, and she was just about to tell the person to stuff it when a voice spoke her name. Her eyes were directed toward the man, and she raised her brows. “Adonis?” she asked, even if she knew it was him. “You – seem different” she pressed her brows together and couldn’t figure out if it was the beard, the hair, or something else entirely. “Yeah, you got that right, just walk around knocking down pretty women now, are we?” she said as a looped side grin lifted her lips.

You – seem different a small huff that more or less turned into a little laugh, left the old werewolf's lips. "If I got a pound for every time someone had told me that the last couple of months," he shook his head a little bit, not minding it. But it was insane what it had done to his entire demeanor had changed after getting his heart back. Well of course, it was different even if no none had known he had never had a whole hearted conversation before, always felt like he was missing his spirit in it, business, love and the like, his heart had never been in it, not till now. "Isn't that how you are supposed to, how else would I get your fine attention if not by suddenly and casually just happen to knock down a few pretty faces," he let out a teasing little laugh and shook his head, given his reputation if was perhaps not something he should joke about, but it happened to be so he felt like Sol could see past that, or maybe he hoped, surely there was no take back on the words he had spoken now. "Why were you in such rush anyways?" Adonis wondered, not saying it was her fault for the whole thing, but he could sense she had her nose headed somewhere too.

”Let me guess; you’ll be a wealthy man?” Sol said with a small smirk forming on her lips. Then she nodded, letting out a soft huff of laughter when he asked if that wasn’t how you got pretty women’s attention these days. There could be something about it; she wouldn’t know as it had been a very long time since she had even gotten close to having a physical relationship in a very long time. The last time had been remotely linked to someone romantically had been with Victoria. Which was a couple of years ago by now?
“Well, I was going to the shops because we are running low on potatoes of all things”, she said with a slight shrug, then remembering that Adonis didn’t even know she was running around doing. Just because she kept tabs on people didn’t mean that many kept up to date with what she was doing.
“I own the diner with my sister – wherever she is these days”, she added, then pointed towards the grocery shop not far from where they were walking. “Want to join me?” she asked, for some reason hoping that he might not end up telling her that he had better things to do, which wouldn’t be a very unusual way for Adonis to speak.

Adonis listened to her as she said that she was running low on potatoes, which had him confused for a second if he was being honest. I own the diner, he then nodded now it made a little more sense. Adonis however wondered what had made Sol and Luna even start wanting to own a diner - well there was many things Adonis could wonder about these days. He moved his eyes towards the grocery shop she pointed towards, followed by if he wanted to join her, he turned his head towards her again. Adonis couldn't remember when the last time he had even stepped into a grocery shop, either because well you didn't do your own shopping in the mansion - or you had people to do it. "Sure thing," he replied and placed his hands in his trouser pockets. Because he actually didn't have anything better to do, and it would be an experience itself. Right? He then did a nod with his head, before spinning around so they could head to the grocery store.

A small smile formed over her lips while her brows pressed gently towards one another. It wasn’t just that he had changed, but his demeanour. He seemed, to her, like a dog that had been kicked enough times by its owner till it feared all humankind. So, instead of doing her duty, she fished her phone out of her pocket. It didn’t take long before she had one of the working waiters on the other line telling them that she needed to take care of something else, and they needed to find someone to get the things they needed, and to that, they could take money from the register to do so. She put her phone on silence when the conversation was done and then looked back up at Adonis with narrowed eyes. Taking his one hand out of the pocket, not really giving him a choice in the matter, she started to drag him down the street. “I don’t know what is going on or what happened – but we are going somewhere else”, she mumbled as an explanation for her behaviour at this very moment. Her apartment wasn’t far, and there she could make him a cup of tea and place him on the couch, making him tell her what the hell was going on.

Adonis wondered what she was doing as she started texting someone, before he wouldn't really have liked people just avoiding him or doing something else that didn't get him the attention, but it was past him. A changed man one would say, or perhaps just a version of himself that could cope with the things that had happened to him. Adonis tried every second of the day not to think too much about the things he had done, the things he couldn't change - all the people he had killed, hurt or worse. Then she put her phone back in her pocket and took his hand out of his, it was safe to say Adonis didn't know what do say or do about that, so he did nothing other than perhaps looking a little confused.  Maybe she just like everyone else wanted an explanation to his behavior. Which he understood, had he been in her or other people's shoes, he would have demanded the same. "Okay okay -" he let out a sigh, knowing once again he would have to tab into a place of his mind that he didn't like to revisit, and yet, people demanded to know what had been going on and the only way for them to understand and perhaps to stop fearing he would take over the world by killing everyone in his way - was to actually explain, no matter how much it hurt him to do so.

Sol was many things.
She was ruthless. A killer. She was a sister and a daughter. She had a soft side, and she had a side that made no apologies or compromises. There was the part of her where you were never really sure where you had her. If she was your best friend, or if she would stab you just because you looked at her wrong. Victoria had been the only person to ever lock her down in what a conventional person would call a relationship. But all of those were all masks that Sol wore because when you scratched the surface, you quickly figured out that she was a woman that, most of all, had no idea who she was or whom she wanted to be. Living most of her life for others and what they had told her to do, it was hard to create an identity for herself. Maybe that had been why she had been drawn to Adonis in the first place. Because he too had ambitions, and even if she might not have been part of those ambitions, he had reminded her of home, for however brief that time they had been spending together had been.
So, when she finally unlocked the door to her tiny one-bedroom apartment and then closed the door behind them. It was like a thick tension placed around them, so instead of asking what was going on, her hands were placed on his shoulders, and she pulled him into a soft yet insistent kiss.

He was no stranger to silence, especially not after having gotten his heart back. How everyone in the mansion had walked on eggshells around him, almost afraid to trigger the worst side of him. A side of him that still haunted him like a magical alter ego waiting to take over and reminding him it would be so easy to just become that killer he saw in the mirror. Yet, he hadn't. Adonis had tried to be better, be the best version of himself. They reached the apartment in silence, still in silence. Adonis walked in letting his eyes look around, then looked at her almost waiting for her to cut through the thick surface of tension that had built up to his point. So, he turned to her, looking at her as she was getting closer. Placing her hands on his shoulders, Adonis narrowed his eyes a little bit, almost waiting for her in that second to, well say something. But she didn't. Instead she moved in to kiss him, he didn't stop her, yet he did not lean in or move. Because when was the last time he even had kissed someone with his heart? He didn't get to think too long about that till her lips brushed so softly against his. His heart skipped a beat, almost dropped to the ground, and he pulled away, taking by surprise of the feeling of it hammering against his chest. Looking at Sol, his eyes almost droopy like he could have faced a few tears if he hadn't been living long enough to push those feelings down. Yet, the emotion had overwhelmed him completely, so he just stood there looking at her. Then he lifted his hands up and placed them against her cheeks, cupping them, then once again let his lips meet with hers, wanting to feel what he just had been experiencing again.

She was surprised when he pulled away, not in a bad way, because she understood something was bothering him, and she might have overstepped a boundary she didn’t know anything about.
Then his hands found her cheeks, and with a small smile, she let her lips meet his again as he leaned down towards her. The feeling that spread in her chest was almost overwhelming as she could feel her heartbeat slightly faster by his touch, even if she stood there without moving an inch. Mostly because she thought he might need to take charge and see how far he wanted to go himself without her pushing him to do anything. But it also startled her that she saw this side of him, so tender and carrying. Not that he had been a brute before, but there had been something more animalistic over him instead of this person that was kissing her right now.
Sol finally moved, letting her hand find one of his, folding around it; the other found the nape of his neck and pulled him a little closer. He wasn’t the only one craving the intimacy.

It was not something he understood. It had been over 8000 years since his heart had experienced some sort of affection. Of course there had been lovers and people whom he supposedly would and should have loved, but how could you love someone truly if you didn't have a heart. To all the people who had called him heartless in the past, they had been right. So, had the people who had told him he was cold or didn't love with all his heart. Here right now, he was filling all of that, all the things that had been taking from him within one kiss, almost enough to make the drops escape his eyes, two salty tears that mended with their lips, making him realize he was getting rather emotional about all of it, and thereby broke the kiss in embracement of his own reaction. Turning around and stepping towards the nearest window looking out to catch his breath, taking an even deeper breath in, how was this supposed to bring so much pleasure and pain at the same time, it didn't make any sense. He didn't understand. Adonis shook his head, "I'm sorry - its not you, its me. I'm a mess lately, sorry," he apologized and didn't even dare look her in the eyes for now, even though he could see her reflection in the window.

She blinked a little when he pulled away. Her tongue glided over her lips, tasting the salt from his tears, not that her face showed much emotion other than she just looked at him pulling away, like a hurt animal that didn’t know what to do with itself. It tugged in her heart in a way she hadn’t tried before to see him like that. She had never really had an issue with how he had treated her in the past, how he had seemed distanced or cold; she had just thought that his past had shaped him so that she would never truly understand.
She chuckled as he apologised, then she stepped towards him, and with a firm grip, she took his chin and lifted it so he could look at her. “yeah, I know it’s not me because I don’t kiss that good,” she tried to lighten the mood, not that she was very good at being comical. Usually, she removed a tear with the other hand and let out a soft breath only when she didn't want to be. “Don’t apologise; you’ve lived far longer than any and gone through more than I will ever be able to understand; you want a cup of tea?” she asked, lifting a brow, trying to ease his mind rather than forcing him to do something he didn’t want to.

She grabbed his chin and turned his face towards her, holding his breath, not feeling like he deserved this treatment whenever he remembered what horrors he had been of reason to let out in this world. What sort of damage he had cost so many people. "If I don't at least apologize, I don't know if I'm actually able to move past it," what else could he do? He knew people didn't expect much more of him at this point, yet he didn't feel like he did enough. He wanted to prove himself all the time, and it was exhausting. But yet he did, because the trust wasn't fully their yet. "A cup of tea would be lovely," Adonis replied with a small nod. Because really a good cup of tea was said to be able to ease the nerves in ways not even magic could do, besides he did like the company.

She nodded, trying to understand what he meant, not that she was sure she could. Maybe it was because she had never really had anything against the Adonis he had been before, she had just thought he had followed his nature, and if he now wanted to be someone else, the only thing standing in the way would be him. “All right,” she said and walked towards the small kitchen where she found the kettle and filled it with water.
“You know, I don’t have any ill feelings towards you”, she said, looking at him with a small smile or as much smile as she could give him. “But I’m guessing that you wouldn’t want to hang around with me, now that you are trying to reform and all that” a tilt of her lips formed before she looked back to the cabinet and took down two cups and a small package filled with tea.

He turned to follow her, placing his hands on the nearest counter and looked at her, "I know you don't - this is the main reason why I still feel like I can speak truthfully to you without any judgment, or need to explain my behavior, which is also the sole reason I'm giving it to you," he replied back to her with a small shrug. Because well, she had never judged him completely. "Oh please, I've never had any ill feelings towards you either, and that is me saying that with my heart back - which I now gave away, I had lost my heart for a couple of thousand years, getting it back, changes a man," he chuckled a little even so it wasn't funny at all. He wished things were different, knowing that they couldn't be and wouldn't be. Only if you turned back time, and even fools knew it was a stupid thing to even try do.

Her eyes widened as he explained that his heart had been taken. Then they narrowed as she concluded. “Rebekah?” she asked; now, you would be a fool in the supernatural world if you didn’t know about the first witch and what she could be capable of doing. She nodded when he confirmed it, and then a soft chuckle left her. “So, now you have to deal with all the things you did, and you either hope or believe that you would have done things differently if you had had a heart?” she asked, looking toward him; well, she didn’t have to ask she already knew it was what he believed then she looked back at the kettle that was starting to shake because of the boiling water. “Well, must be quite the turnaround for you and your family –“ and then she had been the first woman to kiss him since he had gotten the back, he would almost believe that there would be other women out there he would rather seek out, wasn’t there that, witch or something, that he had a child with? Ah, yes, Phillipa. “Must be like a drug addict or something, running around apologising for wrongs you did, in hopes that they might forgive you or to ease your own mind” she then shook her head; she couldn’t believe that he would then like to be around her. She wasn’t good, far from it, and she had done very questionable things with her heart intact. She made no apologies for who she was, nor did she care much for changing it. Which also brought her to the conclusion that if he was trying to get back into the fold of his family, they, if anyone, would be very opposed to this friendship, or what you would like to call it.

He confirmed it with a simple nod. Then once again nodded when she mentioned it had been a turnaround for him and his family, because it had. "Well I'm unapologic to the things I do out of my own sheer force of will, I don't like having to apologize for things that I know I wouldn't have done or hoped I wouldn't have done if I'd had an actual say in the matter," Adonis replied and shook his head a little bit. "I've returned to my family, and I'm done killing simply to just protect my kind from humans, unless they really do pose a threat. I have a new code, so - I'm looking forward to get a chance to actually go by it." He knew very well that he followed his brother's word, next his sister's - but Adonis knew he needed to have some rules for himself as well, to make this sense of living worth it. "I know I most talk like a mad man, but well - I guess I am so, I'm allowed," he chuckled a little.

“So, you want to create your own pack here? Or somewhere else?” she asked, lifting a brow. “I’ve heard what happened with the Russian pack; I hope your son is all right,” she also ended up saying; even though it might not sound like she cared, she did. She had, after all, her sister she would do anything for, even the most irrational things; that was just how it worked with people you shared a deeper connection with. “We are all a little mad, we just need to find the people that match our madness, so we seem normal”, Sol said with a hint of a smile on her lips as she turned to look at him, her eyes almost cold as she took him in. She had always had a problem with showing raw emotions, which she had done by the door, and he had pushed her away, which was why she retreated once more. Not that she blamed him; if anything, she would almost say she didn’t care.
The tea was made, so she placed it beside him before walking over to the small couch, sitting down with her own cup, and placing it on the coffee table.

"I'm not interested in having my own pack," he exhaled, even if it might seem like it was what he was after: power. It wasn't something he hungered for in a sense of leading people, after all when it came down to it he had tried it - even if it was under influence, and he didn't like it much. Not when he knew what his youngest son walked around and did for his own pleasure. Adonis wanted nothing more than to pay his son a visit and give him a piece of mind, but knowing it could start another pack war, it was something he had to go through with Damian first - and as well mention what monster he had created, he didn't even dare ask Zoe about how Zaria was doing, scared of the truth mostly. He had been a terrible father, was a terrible father. "Mitchell is ... adjusting," Adonis replied and exhaled a little bit, one of the next reasons why he was a terrible father, Mitchell was out there struggling and he didn't really have much more to give than the sorrys and wanting to change.

Adonis let out a little chuckle, finding someone whom matched your madness, he liked the sound of that. Truly the only one he had ever found who seemed to be just as mad as him was Revna, or Letha as she called herself these days. But it wasn't like it was a path they could walk out on where the two could just call each other. Or maybe they could, his mind was still adjusting itself as well to what was possible and what wasn't. Sol placed the cup beside him making his eyes turn to the tea taking a sharper breath in, why was everything so freaking complicated? Maybe he should just shut it off again? Would it be easier just to push these waves of emotions away and lock them in his head again? Most likely, but it also wouldn't solve anything. But it also took one to know one, when it came to be terrible at dealing with ones emotions. "So, you can't just have retreated to a dinner and decided that is your way of living - I don't buy it, what else are you up to?"

She stopped when he asked what she was doing now; she blinked, almost as if she had disappeared, and if she was being honest—she did, back to the cave where she had been presented to the God that her family had worshipped for centuries. Now, it wasn’t something she shared with everyone; to most, she was just the protector of the Supernatural, but in honesty, she also sacrificed children and naïve creatures of every species, but that wasn’t something her sister knew—she was just happily unaware of how deep the corruption was going when you had given the life to something that could be described more demonic than god.
But the things he had shown her, what he had done to her, well, it was something that she would never be unseen, and for that, she kept herself busy and in a reasonably normal setting, like running a dinner. “And why shouldn’t I just run a Diner? I happen to like it” now, that was a far fetch lie, but she had taken a liking to the young Roman; he always seemed to lighten her mood, even if it wasn’t shown on her facial expression. Then her eyes narrowed “don’t ask questions about things you would rather live without knowing,” she warned him, and then a tiny smile appeared on her lips as she walked over and sat down on the couch with her tea.

He couldn't help but chuckle a little bit, "I bet you do, doesn't mean you can't have something else stirring below the surface," he mused a little then turning around to face her, lifting his brow a little bit, "but my life is so long and dull without the nasty little details of others little events of mischief," Adonis confessed. Well, yes he did have his heart back, and that allowed him to feel things about his words and actions, but there were still things about him that hadn't changed. The hunt for a thrill, pushing the limits and the borders to see when it would break, how far he could reach. It was still very much a part of him. His persona was built on the version of him without his heart, and even if the road was long, he was just adjusting to his life without - trying to find out what he wanted to burden his heart with and what needed to be taken out to the trash. Adonis hated the guilt and sorrow, the pain of love he was sure by now he had never felt.

A genuine smile formed over Sol, one of the rare ones, and then a soft snicker left the mermaid as she looked down at the cup of tea nestled in between her hands. “Well, let's just see that I haven’t been sitting still if that is what you’ve been asking—Luna is coming back soon, even though I’m not sure that is a good thing; she is too hot-headed for her own good” she clicked her tongue, after her little stunt with trying to kill the human hunter, especially in such an openly way—well she wouldn’t be surprised if almost everyone of importance in these parts knew about it. There had been a few powerful enemies that had been made that night, which had been why she had sent her sister away. Even if she had kept taps on Lucas and Cecilia since, for a moment, it had crossed the wicked mermaid's mind to get in touch with Lucas's old boss, see how he would weasel his way out of that one. Word on the street had been that he had already once left the now created werewolf because he had trouble sharing who he really was. Trying to hide away a part of him that would never go away, or at least it wouldn’t be less a part of him. But that was all something she could have in the back of her mind if he posed a problem.
“But I’m not going to lie, the appearance of so many Radclyffee has gotten a lot of attention”, she sighed, closing her eyes; only time would tell if it was a good or a bad thing.

Luna and Sol were forces to be reckoned with, he knew this. Sol and Luna away from each other, they were still that. Even if as Sol said, Luna could be too hot-headed. He didn't comment on that, after all he couldn't really judge anyone for being too much, now could he? The next comment made him chuckle a little bit, "shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone really, werewolves travel in packs," or most often at least. Unless you were a rogue or a lone wolf. Still, everyone shouldn't be surprised if there was a Radclyffee, another would show up soon enough. Back before he had gotten his heart back, he would have thought of it as a bad thing, but given his turn of events, Adonis had found himself rather thankful for knowing he had this part of himself back. The pack, he was a part of it again. Had rejoined his family.