We got it all right here

Date | 23rd Apr. 2022
Time | Around 10am
Weather | Sunny, warm, spring is finally coming
Place | Ace’s home, not far from where she lives herself
Attire | A red summerdress, a hat and sunglasses. On her feet she is wearing white converse with blue socks


Today, was a day to be happy. So, she had met with Jonathan, and it had brought up a lot of unresolved feelings about how they had parted. But one thing she had truly gotten from that meeting, that she might have told herself if she had used her brain, that there were people out there that could help with her little problem. Knowing that Sarah didn’t live far from where she lived, she had used most of the early morning to find the small hut, where she had found the ancient witch in a rather good mood, giving her a small bracelet that she told her, that she needed to get charged after every new moon, but if she kept wearing it her troubles wouldn’t be an issue.
Then she had made sure that Ace was actually off work, and then she had bought a couple of really nice croissants and some good tea to go.

It had been far too long since she had actually seen him, just the two of them. And there was a small bounce in her step as she walked up and knocked on the door, looking over her shoulder before she turned as the door opened. Just taking her sunglasses off before her eyes locked with his “Hi!” a bright warm smile formed over her lips. “I brought bribe, please don’t turn me away” she chuckled softly as she put the cups with tea and the bag filled with croissants in front of her. Looking over the bags she gave him her best pleading eyes “you know, because I’ve missed you, and your grumpy face”

It was almost a month ago since Michelle had paid a visit to his home, and some of the things were still a mess. It just took a lot of time when he spent more time at the hospital, and when he was off, he was at Hope’s place. So, it was only when he felt like going back, or when he could arrange something ‘magical’ with someone to get the space cleaned up – he didn’t want to bother Hope too much with it. He was certain cleaning the things up would bring up bad memories from how Michelle had acted out.
It knocked on the door and Ace dragged himself to the door, after having cleaned the table in the living room and some armchairs. His supply of blood bags hadn’t been looked at, and therefore there were still roots from that room, that one could see when the front door was opened. He opened the door and there was Willow. “Hi,” he said pulling on a smaller smile. She had told him multiple times to cheer up a little. He looked at her bribe as she spoke of it and took a greater breath in. He then looked up at her about to tell her that his home really wasn’t presentable, but as he saw her pleading eyes and heard her ‘begging’, he let out a sigh. “Fine…” he sighed and stepped away from the door so she could get inside, “But watch your step. Michelle visited a month ago.”

“Yes!” she exclaimed with a cheery voice and stepped inside, then her eyes went big as he explained that Michelle had been visiting a month ago. “And what, thought she try to bulldoze the place?” she asked looking towards him, feeling how the left side of her lip twisted up in a side looped grin. “Sorry isn’t really funny, what a mess” she mumbled, giving him the bag and the two cups of tea as she walked inside of the house letting her eyes scan the place. What was it about witches and being so emotional, as she turned towards where there once had been a room she could see roots and flowers coming out of it. “Well, being a nature spirit myself I can’t really say that I don’t like the new décor, but I’m thinking you would rather be without?” she turned giving him a soft smile, her fingers closing around the wrist were the newest addition to her clothing had been added. “Besides dealing with crazy ex’s, how are you? I feel like I don’t see you at all these days” not that she blamed him, there were so many things going on, that if it wasn’t one thing that took your attention, it was another.

He shook his head a little as she got inside. He looked up at her, raising a brow as Willow asked if Michelle had tried to bulldoze the place. If he had to be honest, he had no clue why Michelle had gone there, except for the reason to make a scene. Maybe she had hoped to talk to him, but who knows. Willow on the other hand was quick to notice how it hadn’t really been funny. His embrace was filled with both tea and the paper bag.
He closed the door and followed right behind her, until he got to the living room where he put the things down and turned to look at her, looking at the room filled with odd roots and flowers. “I stored bloodbags in there, so yes, I would rather be without the roots,” he explained to her before he looked back at the table that he luckily had cleaned. He picked up the cup of tea taking a sip of it while she spoke. He took a bigger breath in, as she explained how she didn’t feel like she ever saw him. “I’m busy,” he shrugged before he gestured her to enter the living room, so she could sit down on one of the armchairs. “I’m mostly living at Hope’s after-” he gestured to Michelle’s masterpiece, “all of that,” The armchair he chose to sit down in squeaked a little as he sat down, “Have you met Hope?” he wondered and furrowed his brows a little. If he had to be honest, he felt like all of his days melted into one. Surgeries, the emergency room and being with Hope. And if he didn’t do that, well… Then he was here, cleaning. But honestly, the two firsts took up so much of his time since he worked at multiple hospitals.

She chuckled as he explained that he had kept his blood bags there. “Well, then it makes sense she went after it”, she mumbled, turning towards him as he then gestured her to sit down in the living room, which she did. For a woman that had once been the source of blood that was the most delicious, to be poisonous for the person she loved. It had to do something with once’s head, not that she would ever get to understand the level of extremes Michelle wanted to go to.
Willow shook her head as he asked if she had met Hope. "Only heard off her through Ayah, but I’ve mostly just seen her when she has been working on her garden”, she explained, licking her lips, and couldn’t keep the goofy grin off her lips. “I met Jonathan again”, she said, letting her hands glide over her thighs, letting out a soft sigh, delighted to get it off her chest. “He wants us to be together, he doesn’t care about his family anymore, so this time, this time, it might actually work, you know?” she looked at Ace since he had seen her both during and after her time with Jonathan, but also when Malcolm had turned her away and told her that she couldn’t help him. He knew that she hadn’t had the best of luck when it came to men. Not that she blamed either of them, Jonathan hadn’t been able to choose her back then. And Malcolm had been grieving both his mother and his wife, that had killed herself. But this time, this time, she was hopeful that it would turn out all right.

Ace grumbled a little as Willow pointed out that it made sense why Michelle had gone for the blood bags. He agreed, but it didn’t make it less annoying.
He nodded, as the silent man he was, when she explained that she hadn’t really met Hope. She then mentioned Jonathan, which made Ace look up at Willow. She seemed a little happy to get it off her chest. Had she been nervous to tell him about it? Well, he would understand why. Not that it was dangerous to tell him, but there was a grand chance that he wouldn’t agree about the two of them. He straightened a bit up before she explained. His brows furrowed. “I’m sorry… Can you repeat that?” he asked, though it was rhetorical. He licked his lips and interlocked his fingers, while letting his arms rest on his legs, while he leaned forward again. “He cared for his own ass. I- Willow, please don’t tell me that he has convinced you that you-” he licked his lips swallowing the many words that wanted to escape his mouth. “Sorry, but how are you sweethearts going to do that?” He didn’t even know if he wanted to tell her how Jonathan had sought Primrose for help. It simply wasn’t acceptable what he had done. Oh, how he hated that boy…

The smile that had found its way to her lips slowly faltered. Mostly because she could see that he disapproved; now, there was a small voice in her head asking her if she had sincerely thought he would. Given how Jonathan had decided to break it off with her the last time, could she blame him for being like this? In a way, if he hadn’t, did he really care at all. Nonetheless, she could still feel how her heart sank, and the lump in her throat started to build. How are you, sweethearts, going to do that?. her eyes flickered away from him, trying to figure out if she was going to tell him about the bracelet.
“I – he told me he hadn’t stopped thinking about me”, she whispered in a pitiful attempt to make it sound better than it did. But as the words left her, she could hear it herself; she had heard it all before. She was a muse, after all; she inspired creativity, inspiration. There had been so many artists alike that had wanted her to be in their presences, so they could feel how creativity flowed through them, making them addicted to having her near.
Her fingers closed around the wrist with the bracelet. “I made a deal with a witch”, she said with a pitiful voice, folding her lips in an attempt not to let them quiver. Was she really that foolish? Was she really that desperate for love that she would just let anyone sway her with promises and words instead of actions?

He could see how she felt uncomfortable, but if he had to be honest, she might need a new set of glasses. Hers were tinted pink, so she couldn’t see the red flags from the white. Ace took a long breath in, as she mentioned that Jonathan hadn’t stopped thinking about him. He folded his lips before he nodded. “Alright. Good,” he replied. He tried to think about how she would react if he said that Michelle came crawling back to him and said she hadn’t stopped thinking about him. Would that change anything? Okay, if she hadn’t done what she had done the other day, and been radio silent since then, it might have changed something, since Michelle had asked their daughter to break the bond as soon as Ace’s neck had been broken. But did she have to get the name changed? Why had she been so afraid of the pain? Yes, it was odd questions that he could keep asking himself, but they were questions that he had put on the top shelf to collect dust many years ago.
“A deal?” his brows raised a little interested. He let his hands run over his lips, pinching them for a thoughtful moment, “Who is this witch, if I may ask? You know very well that deals with witches has consequences, and depending on who it is, the consequences can be more wicked,” he reminded her. No, he didn’t believe that Willow was stupid or didn’t think things through. She had after all visited him and started talking about it, correct? She might however be slightly foolish to walk back to a dud.

“He talked about that his sister and her daughter were able to help him with the mate mark, and I – I talked with Sarah Sinclair, and she gave me something that would make sure that people wouldn’t get infected by my lips”, she whispered putting the cards on the table then she looked up letting out a small breath. “Urgh, I’m so stupid!” she mumbled, getting up from the couch as she let her fingers glide through her hair. “I was so blinded by the fact that all around me just seems to fade away, and I’m standing back with no one to call my own” she wanted to kick herself; how could she believe that this time would be different?
She walked towards him and decided to place herself on the ground by his leg and put her head on his thigh. “I guess I’m just, you know – Malcolm started dating Minerva, so I don’t really see him anymore – Ayah is always occupied with her family or with her new, old friend Mateo – and you, yeah, even you found someone, and I just thought, maybe it was my time” she whispered knowing just how pitiful that sounded. She dried away some of the tears “sorry, I know how much you value your time off, and now I’m just here wailing about a stupid boy like a lovesick fool” she tried to laugh even though the laugh didn’t really sound genuine.

Ace listened carefully. There was after all a chance that things made sense. Sarah Sinclair had helped Willow, and now Willow had something that would make sure that one wouldn’t be infected of her lips. Interesting. Had Willow tried it? What if it didn’t work? Yes, Ace was quite pessimistic, but he might just need to be to make sure she didn’t do something that she would regret for the rest of her life. As of right now, she could have sweet innocent dreams about Jonathan and none of them would get hurt, but if the thing that she had gotten from Sarah ever failed to work, she would forever have a lovesick Jonathan clinging to her leg, and she wouldn’t be able to take his life because she loved him too much.
His eyes followed her as she was being sour to herself and started walking around. She felt lonely just because she didn’t have anyone to call her own. He understood. He might be one of the few who understood, though she was much older than him.
He wanted to let her think things through. He had pushed her thoughts and she was doing somewhat well right now. He just had to be her to deescalate things if they got out of hand. He leaned back as she sat down on the floor with her head on his thigh. She had so much on her heart, and he understood that she was frustrated. “My free time is also spending time with the people I care about,” he said with a soft smile, to let her know that she wasn’t wasting his time. “Do you feel lonely, Willow?” he spoke softly. If she realized that she might be lonely, she might realize that she sought the attention that she truly didn’t need, attention that wouldn’t fix the problem she was in. She had to walk through what she was in right now to get better and actually get what she wanted.

Her fingers glided around his knee as he mentioned that his free time was also for spending time with the people he cared about. That earned him a soft smile, even though it might be hard for him to see, as she was facing the opposite direction, watching her slender finger that circled the fabric that his pants were made off.
Then her fingers found the bracelet that she had been wearing, and after a few speculations, she pulled it off and let the metal ring as it bounced around on the floor before it silently lay there as a reminder that she couldn’t run from who she was. That no easy fix could bring her closer to her dream, she needed to find a person that would truly love her. With all their heart, and never want anyone else. But how would that ever be possible in a modern world like this? Everything was so fast-paced that no one really felt like they had the time to sit down and get to know the person.
Do you feel lonely, Willow?
Her entire nose started to burn as she desperately stared at a small spot on the wall. Her eyes tried to water, and she did everything in her might not to let herself sob or break down by those words. Did she feel lonely? It was so easy to answer but so hard to face the fact. “All the time”, she whispered, pulling herself away from his leg and pressing her backside down to the heels on her feet. Her eyes looked at her friend, pulling a soft smile as her nose started to redden and her eyes glazed over. “All the time”, she repeated and looked away, “I’m so scared to get hurt again, and at the same time, I just hope that there will come a person and love me with all their heart so we can be together – I’m constantly putting up that one barricade that stops me from my dream, and in a twisted and stupid attempt to skip that part where I meet a person, see where it takes us and hope that they might end up loving me, as the true love that everyone reads about in fairy books just because I’m afraid” she whispered, letting her eyes fall to her hands. She lifted her left hand and pushed some of her hair behind her ear with a sigh. A deep sigh left her before she looked back up at Ace with a softer smile than before. “Are you happy with Hope?” she asked, not really knowing where that came from. Maybe a futile attempt to talk about something else, hoping she might find joy in knowing that Ace had finally found someone he had let in. Someone that loved him, even if he was being a stubborn ass.

He noticed how she pulled the bracelet off and thought about how it may or may not be what she had received from the witch. He let her take her time, and eventually, she replied to the difficult question. He looked at her, as she looked up at him. He could see how much it affected her. He wanted to ask her, if she felt like, having someone made her complete, but on the other hand, he could see that words were trying to get out of her mouth, which made him shut up and let her speak for herself. It told so much more when she could speak for herself – let the thoughts run.
He listened and kept a keen eye on how she moved and spoke. Fairytales, as she said so herself. He imagined she had more to say about how she felt, but instead, she asked about how he felt with Hope. The question got him on the wrong leg and made him frown. “I really want us to focus on you not jumping into something because someone said they had been thinking about you,” he said, keeping his eyes on her, skipping he question. Of course, he could answer it with ease, but if they opened another topic, they were going to forget what was going on, and this was something that he wanted to be certain that was on the right tracks. It was a topic that simply had to be all okay before she could leave.

Her eyes flickered from his as he kept them on the topic. She should have known better than to direct the attention toward him. Her teeth pulled back her bottom lip, and she started chewing on it thoughtfully. “I –“ she started to say something but couldn’t finish the thought, feeling like everything was a jumbled mess. Then she turned her dark hazel eyes towards him. “Imagine living a life where all you want to have is a human connection, to not be afraid that somehow your lips grace them, and they will end up so infatuated with you that they either grow insane with the hunger for you and ultimately they’ll end up killing themselves” she licked her lips and moved her legs, so she was sitting a little better than on her heels. “It’s not because I think that I’ll be happier just because I find the one, but I’ve walked for thousands of years alone after my family let themselves turn to the darkness in wonderland – they weren’t beautiful beings, but monsters that killed for the thrill of it” she shook her head “beauty was gone, and I tried for so long to find myself, and then I found a man that could kiss me, that could hold me, and I didn’t need to be afraid that something would happen, because he loved me for who was I was, not what I could give – I” she closed her eyes and filled her lungs with air before letting it out again “I just wanted, I just want to be loved” she finally declared feeling how her nose stung again “I want to be loved for my bad side, for my good – I want to have fights with the one I love, I want to grow with someone and not question myself if something is wrong with me” her fingers found the bracelet again. She started turning it around, blinking away a couple of tears as she let out a small sigh. “So there it is, the heartbroken tale of a musai that just wanted to be loved and to feel what real love was”, she said with a slight chuckle and looked up at Ace with half a smile playing on her lips.

Ace clenched his teeth as she shared her point of view. She hungered for love. She hungered for a connection that wasn’t toxic but true. She had been so close to it and now it was begging at her doorstep to let them try again. She reflected on how she was different compared to her family. It was a great start. She was seeking something that would make her happy, just like how they killed for the thrill of it. She wasn’t like them. As she explained that she wanted to be loved, he wished to tell her that she was loved, but the love she sought, was not the kind of love that he would mention. She wanted the erotic, passionate love. She explained how she wanted to be loved for everything, how she wished to grow with her person.
Not question myself if something is wrong with me.
If Ace had been anyone but himself, he might have gotten truly angry of that sentence. There was nothing wrong with her. She was perfect as she was, flaws or not. He licked his lips, taking a deeper breath in, as she finished her story.

He leaned a little down and let his hands grab her head, so she wouldn’t look away. “Look at me all the time,” he told her, almost staring into her eyes. “There is nothing wrong with you. You don’t need a romantic love to be complete. I know how much you wish to feel loved, but you are loved. There are many who loves you, completely for who you are. Good, bad, discussions, growth. All of it.” he looked at her for a moment. Now, he might be a little rough sometimes, because he wouldn’t just let her walk around with the thought that she was unloved. “I know that your friends are feeling the love in the air, but that doesn’t mean that you have to do the same. I know that you want to, Willow, I know. Life sucks sometimes.” His eyes shifted from what eye he looked at. “Repeat after me, okay?” he took a smaller breath in.

Her heart skipped a beat when his hands found her face and titled it so she had to look into his eyes. How could it not when her eyes connected with his? It would have been something else if they hadn’t been in this situation before. If she hadn’t felt the thrill going through her body. Hadn’t felt the passion scorched her like a burning fire. How close their lips had been as air had been exchanged through unsaid words. But like everything else it hadn’t happen and they had startet to pretend that it had been close too. She knew he wanted to make her feel better but all it did, was making her feel even more lonely. Because even if he was correct and there was people that loved her, why did she have to stand on the sideline while they created families without her?
Tears started to glide down her cheeks, and even though she tried to repeat after him, it was clear to both hear and see that it didn’t come easily.
“I wish I could believe it too” she said, saying it out loud was easy, but truly believing the words that was something else. “But it’s not that simple, Ace” she added “you’ve had love, heart break and the thing that follows, you’re a father, a brother, a son” the last words almost didn’t manage to leave her lips as her eyes close and sobs started to leave her. Silent storms that ripped through her body as her fingers grabbed the dress she was wearing. Hugging it close as her head turned in his hands and looked downward. For someone so happy all the time, it was clear to see that this was the real Willow. Breaking apart in Ace’s hands.

Ace was proud that Willow tried, even though he could see that she felt hurt and that it might not be working how he had wished it would have worked. Maybe she needed to repeat this every day? Maybe in the morning and in the evening, looking at herself in the mirror? He knew that it had a positive effect on many to repeat positive words, and on good days, they would feel even more powerful. Just like saying ‘I can do it’ could hype someone up to the extremes on a good day.
He raised his brows as she said she couldn’t believe it, that it wasn’t that simple. He shook his head of her almost whispering ‘no’s’. He didn’t want her to dig her own grave in bad thoughts. He stopped as she directed everything towards him. “Hey, hey,” he stood up for a short moment, and let his leg push his stool away with quite a bit of force with his foot. He sat down in front of her, pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her in a hug, making sure her head was next to his, on his shoulder. “Don’t compare yourself to others,” he whispered, holding her close. “You’re not me. You’re not Willson. You’re not Max. You are you. You are Willow,” he whispered, speaking slowly, and letting her tears stream down. “You got your own story. We all got our own stories,” he pulled away and looked at her again and dried her cheeks carefully. “Had we been humans, most of us would have died alone – but that is not our stories,” he looked from one eye to another. “The love that you’re seeking doesn’t just come because you wish for it to come. It comes when you least expect it. You have to love yourself,” he made sure to keep eye contact as much as possible, “Because when you love yourself, you don’t expect someone else to fill out what you feel like you're missing.”

It was almost like it happened in a fluid motion. The stool was pushed away. His arms found her. Her arms found him. It was like she could breathe as she was pulled into his embrace. Her sharp and uneven breaths became much more controlled as she pulled herself closer to him. She buried her face in his shoulder as he spoke, knowing that his clothes would take her tears. Then he turned and pulled away. Her face lifted slowly, and a soft smile appeared on her lips as he told her that they would have died alone if they had been humans.
“What if I feel like I can never truly love myself before I’ve reached that goal in myself – what then?” she asked, closing her eyes, and a silent sigh left her. “It’s not because I don’t love myself, I’m not trying to change who I am, I just, I’m just wondering when will it be my time?” she was such an old soul; how far in life in love should she have to wander alone? Was it really too much she was asking? That someone would love her, that she would be able to carry a child and become a mother? Another sigh left her as she opened her eyes and looked into his. A more genuine smile formed on her lips as she placed her forehead against his. “Thank you, I always appreciate how honest you are with me”, she whispered, and the smile grew more in strength.

He shook his head gently. With no words, he told her that such goal didn’t exist. No one needed anyone to love themselves – that was a foolish thing to think. “No one knows when it’s their time. I know it might seem rude to say, but it’s like death. You don’t know when it’s your time and you most often can’t cheat it. People are too brilliant,” He licked his lips a little. “You should know, that you’re probably more likely to find someone who truly wants you and who doesn’t second guess their feelings,” he explained, “You are able to see if people just want you or if they actually love you,” his eyes shifted a little, “Most people are unsure about their love for their partner, but I am certain, that your person will be the one and only,” he explained and pulled a small smile.
He closed his eyes as her forehead leaned towards his. “That’s the least I can do,” he spoke softly, not seeing how her smile grew. It wasn’t that important to him whether she smiled or not, because everything could be a façade.

It was like someone took their hands and squeezed her heart. She wasn’t sure why these feelings became almost unbearable, but it felt like someone was dragging her into the void where only Ace’s hands and voice kept it at bay. Maybe that was why it hurt so much because even if he told her that her friends loved her for who she was, it was still not the same. How could it be? Her person. The smile faltered, and tears glided down her cheek as she closed her eyes and kept her forehead pressed against his. At least for a while longer before she had to be pulled back to the real-life that was happening around her.
Her hand found his cheek, and she softly let her thumb glide over his cheekbone. Then she pulled away, not wanting to overstep, not wanting to be swept away in some fantasy that would never be more than that. “Maybe I should finally take that holiday I always talk about, get out and explore the world for a couple of weeks and then come back with a fresh view on everything”, she said with a soft smile, letting her eyes travel towards the cups of tea. Almost as if she was trying to run away from whatever had happened on the floor between them, she got up and walked over to take her paper cup and took a sip, trying to calm her nerves.

He let her pull away, though he was cautious whether or not she was actually ready to face the world as it was. Ace wasn’t the one who liked physical touch much, but he could comfort anyone if they needed it, Primrose being one of the people he had comforted the most, but that might also be because Michelle hadn’t been there that much after Ace had ‘died’.
He pulled on a light smile, “As long as it’s only weeks and not years like I did,” he said raising his brows a little at her. He knew that some immortal beings liked to be somewhere for solitude and to find themselves. Him self included. “It’ll be like a drop in the ocean, the short time that you’ll be somewhere else,” he assured her, letting her know that he would still be there after.
She then got up and retrieved her tea. His eyes followed her for a moment before he with a small sigh got up from the floor and picked his stool up, putting it back where it had been. He licked his lips thoughtfully. He was so used to being completely free that it was odd not being able to ask her if she wanted company, because there was a chance that Hope didn’t like the idea of him being gone for a longer while. Odd feeling. Settled. “And if you’re leaving at some point, do everything I wouldn’t do,” he said with a short laugh, knowing that at some points, they weren’t really that alike, and at other points, they were very much alike.

Her gaze turned towards him when he told her that as long as it was only weeks. Maybe that was why she found it so odd that people around her said that she was loved. But when it came down to it, it was always her left behind. Malcolm had taken off and gone on his walk. Ace to Australia. Ayah, well she always had somewhere to be, giving her nature it was natural that she would go where the wind blew. Jonathan had made her reject him. But she? She was always there when they came back, ready to open her arms and welcome her home. Had she maybe hoped that someone would tell her not to go? That there was a reason for her to stay. Her hand found her chest as she tried to rob away the aching feeling that started to form in her heart.
“True, who knows, maybe I’ll like it so much that I’ll do like everyone else and stay away for longer than just weeks,” she said with a small smile pushing some of her hair behind her ear. “The list is too long if I should do everything you wouldn’t do” she joked and gave him a bigger smile, even if it didn’t completely reach her eyes.

Ace furrowed his brows as he noticed how she rubbed her chest and the words that escaped her right after, and for once he felt a little hopeless. “Willow,” he said tilting his head a little trying to look past the locks of hair. “I would prefer that you get back as quickly as possible, but if you need time, you should take all the time that you need,” he told her. Ace truly cared for her, she was after all his best friend throughout so many years. Of course, he didn’t want her to be gone for more than needed, but if she needed to be gone, that was what she needed. He didn’t want to stand in her way for her.
Ace walked over to her and took her paper cup out of her hands, very gently and placed it on the table before he looked back up at her. “You are spiraling,” he told her, keeping his eyes on her. He then let his hand poke her sternum, “You, miss,” he said looking at her. “You are wanted. You’ll be missed. Don’t think that I won’t drag you all the way back to Athena. Mountains, air, water. I will come for you,” he told her, poking her a couple of times. Pushing her thoughts.

Her eyes started to water as he once again came closer, and she was so close to pulling away, telling him not to. A tear escaped her eyes; maybe she was spiralling, but how much abandonment could one take before you broke?  When you realised that fairy tale you had started to believe was with the man that had made that piece of her heart break off, a little more every year she was alone?
Her eyes started to flicker, and even though she was happy that he told her that he would come and get her back, it still didn’t take away the pain. “I’m so sorry, I think I need to go” she nodded as more tears escaped her eyes. “I’m not feeling well, everything hurts, and I just, I don’t want to put more on your plate right now; it’ll only make me feel worse” she nodded, knowing that he wanted to be there for her if he could, but she wasn’t sure that anything he said would make her feel better. “I promise I’ll call and not just run away”, she said with a small smile pushing her hair back and drying away her tears again. “I just, I need to be alone”, she whispered. All of this was starting to mess with her head more than it should be.

She had to go. His eyes followed her, watching how she nodded, almost as if she was convincing herself more than him. She explained how everything hurt. He knew very well. She was indeed in pain. She promised him to call and not just run away. But right now, she was running away, in his eyes. She wanted to be alone. “You don’t want to be alone,” he told her, without moving an inch. “You really wanted to talk about all of this because you don’t know what to do anymore,” His eyes were as glued to her. “You know I listen, and you know that I care. You know that I know you’re in pain and even though it hurts so, so bad, it’s not going to get easier alone,” His jaw tensed for a split second. “You are only just scaping the surface and you do not want to be alone with everything underneath the surface.” He licked his lips. “Sit down.”

Willow sucked in her lip as he started putting everything down. The harsh truth if one wanted to be honest. And if anything, Willow was real as best as she could. When she had a bad day, she wasn’t too shy to tell people to fuck off and leave her alone. When she was being sad, you could see it on her face. Even when she always tended to put on a smile, that was for the patients and not her friends. Her friends mostly saw her true face, well, at least as much as Willow allowed them to, because she didn’t want them to worry too much about her when they had their own thing going on.
“Fine”, she mumbled, walking over and almost falling down on the couch; with a groan, she let her head connect with the back of the sofa. “But, could you just, for a moment – just tell me how things are with Hope? Tell me about her,” she mumbled, closing her eyes needed something else to think about while she sorted through all the emotions that roared through her body.