You weren't here

So many things had been going on. The fight with Walter, which had been one big misery. No matter what Diego did, every hit just reversed itself onto him, and even if Diego tried to use his abilities on him, the man only got younger, and Diego older. It had resulted in Diego having to kill one of his own plants to get back to his own energy level. Julianne had called, needing him to come over immediately, and when he had arrived, she told him that she was pregnant. They spent some time talking things thought and decided that it was best for them to not have the third child. After all, he was with Danica now and they didn’t wish for more siblings to be separated because of him being with another, and her family wanting to kill any unfit species. This was for the better.

Diego’s phone had died shortly after he had talked with Julianne over the phone. Now that it didn’t play his ringtone whenever someone called him, he didn’t think much about the fact that it might’ve been dead. He didn’t even know. So he went home and lived his day like he normally did. Making sure Derek and Elena was alright and eventually he went to bed.

He woke up in the early morning and after he had fetched his coffee, he tried to check his phone, only to notice that it had died. Calm, as if nothing could ever happen with his phone being turned off for less than a day, he put it in the charger and went down into his front yard to enjoy his coffee. If was only an hour later that he went up and turned on his phone and with the memory of the position accessed his phone with the code.

And then all the messages turned in. The phone almost didn’t stop buzzing. He recognized Danica’s face on most of the voicemails which was bussing in. He got a hold of Elena to help him get access to his voicemail so he could listen to the messages.

As soon as he had heard the last message his put his phone away and rushed out to his car to storm out to the hospital. As he arrived, he parked right in front of the entrance, not really minding that it wasn’t allowed and that he could be fined. He jumped out of the car, letting the door stand open and ran inside.
And there she stood. She had just said no to calling anyone and was in the middle of stuffing her bag. “Danica,” he said and rushed up to her, cupping her face to look at her. “What’s going on?” he wondered, his eyes searching for answers. He didn’t think much of the fight he had been in the day before or how it could’ve affected Danica.

She looked like when they first had met, and he couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened since she looked like this in such a short time. He frowned a little as she repeated the words he had just spoken. He truly didn’t understand what was going on, and why she seemed to have some kind of grudge on him all  of a sudden. He didn’t really know what she meant with where he was since he had received all of the messages this morning. He had no clue when she made all of the calls. “I-” he furrowed his brows a little listening to how she had tried to call him. “I’m sorry,” he furrowed his brows a little. His voice was indeed apologetic – he cared for her after all. “My phone died at some point, and I got here as fast as I could as I opened my phone this morning,” he tried to explain. Even though she had pulled his hands away from her face, he could see she was struggling. He put his arms around her and held her close “I’m sorry, mi reina,” he whispered. He wished to support her and he wished that he had been there for whatever had happened.

Diego knew how to hurt a witch the most, but he clearly hadn’t been thinking about that when Walter had trespassed yesterday and when every attack was reversed. It had taken a couple of tries to figure it out to be fair.

He frowned a little, “Yeah, my phone died. I noticed this morning,” he elaborated. Diego wasn’t really the phone type of guy. He only really received calls and rarely called others. How was he supposed to know that his phone was dead when nothing had been beeping at him? He didn’t even know that everything happened the day before, so how was he supposed to give her the answers she wished to receive.

He wasn’t much for letting go of her, but he made sure to walk by her side out to the car, where it stood wide open – still with the keys in and all. He scoffed with a smile on his lips as she asked if he was trying to get his car stolen. “No, I just got here as fast as I could,” he explained to her looking at her. They approached the car, and he opened the door on the passenger’s side to help her. He waited for her to get in, and if she did, he would try and look for any difficulties about getting her seatbelt on – if she had any, he would help her. “How are you feeling?” he asked softly looking worried at her. After all, her wellbeing meant more and more to him.

Even though she got inside the car and all, the worry didn’t get away. She had closed herself in, and it seemed like it would take some time before she would warm up to him again, even though he still didn’t know what had happened. What he did know was that she had wished for him to be there, and he hadn’t been there. “That’s okay,” he replied softly before he started the car and began to drive home. If she seemed to get more and more tired, he would help her fall asleep in the car, by taking some of her energy – like usual.
He parked the car in front of his own place and hurried out to her side of the car and opened the door before he got her into his embrace, as if she was a bride, locked the door and clicked on the car key to lock the car. “I’ll give you some rest,” he mumbled and with some difficulty got inside. He called to Elena that he was home and went upstairs to his room, where he put Danica into his bed. Whether or not he had taken any energy from her, he now gave her some of his own, hoping she would feel more energized and that he could heal anything that had been damaged. When he got far enough, it was like something was missing. He waited for her to have some kind of eye contact with him before he frowned a little. “Can you please tell me what happened? Why were you at the hospital?” he questioned with a small frown on his forehead.

He frowned a little. How did she kn… Oh yes… He eyes fell onto the bedding. Why hadn’t he thought of that. “I’m sorry,” he said. He still had no clue what she had experienced, but it was quite clear that it had been painful to her, just like it had hurt himself to try and beat up the alpha. He looked at her as she sat up and was very aware if she was getting dizzy or in one way or another seemed to have to lay down again.

He let his fingers gently grab around her curly locks and wrap them behind her ear so he could see her pretty, but tired face. “An unwelcome alpha got into my territory and… His powers somehow reverse attacks,” he tried to explain. “I was here and Irina had just shared that she was pregnant and… I just wished for her and Selene to be safe,” he tried to elaborate and kept his gaze on her. “I’m sorry that it hurt you. It wasn’t on purpose,” he said apologizing to Danica looking at her feeling how he felt guilty of putting her into unnecessary pain. He didn’t wish her that like the first time they met. He wished her to be well, healthy and thriving.

Her words cut through his body. She was. How hadn’t he noticed the extra energy source inside of her? Had he just been blind all along? Why hadn’t she told him? His mind was being flooded with questions and wonder. He had wished to support her if she had wished to keep it. As she got up, he didn’t hesitate to get up too and walk a little slow after her. He didn’t want her to be rushing out. He hoped that she would at least stay for a while and get some well-deserved rest. She had needed him, and he hadn’t been there, because he hadn’t been able to think twice about what the hell his actions had done to her. After all, Julianna had caught his attention to, with also being pregnant and… Why was everyone pregnant?
He wished for her to tell him everything that she felt at this moment. She felt like he had forgotten her and not even been thinking about her for one second. He had… Briefly, but with the circumstance he had been in everything had just been so chaotic and if she had known everything, she might’ve understood why things had been forgotten… Though, at the same time he also knew that no matter what, it wasn’t fair that he got into a fight when he was connected to her. He should be wiser. “I’m sorry,” he whispered and saw how she placed her hand in front of her mouth, as if she had some kind of realization.
“No, don’t-” he started to approach her and if he could, he would wrap his arms around her. Without really realizing it, he tried to calm her down speaking Spanish; “Shh, I’m here, my queen. I won’t let it happen again. You’re strong and you can do this. I know you can,” he whispered. If he could time travel, he would undo his actions and made sure that he had checked up on Danica before he had visited Julianne. That would’ve been wiser.

She moved out of his embrace and trned towards the door. She wanted air, which was fair enough. She moved slow enough for him to not just call her her and tell her to stay inside for a while. He just didn’t want to let her out of sight right now, so he followed her without a word into the garden. He watched how she walked all the way onto the grass and just stood there feeling the rain drizzle down. He did his best to remember exactly what he had done to Walter, but most of the things were a blur from the adrenaline and rage that he had been filled with. What he remembered most was laying on the ground. He had been so pathetic, and he was just happy that Derek had been with Julianne, so he hadn’t seen what had been going on. In total, he just wished that he could change all of yesterday. He had no idea of what the hell had been going on, because usually he had great control over his emotions and anger, but something about Walter just put his blood to a boiling point.

For starters, he stood under the roof of terrace and watched her, how she got wetter and wetter from standing in the rain. Finally, he approached her. He didn’t touch her or anything but just stood next to her, closed his eyes and tilted his head backwards. He didn’t want to intrude on her peace, but he wanted her to know, that he was there if she needed him, even though this wasn’t really how he usually comforted people. He was usually this big laughing teddy bear, and this was just silence.

It wasn’t really that this was something Diego enjoyed, but the more he stood here with her, the more he liked how it felt. As she sobbed, Diego had to restrain himself from try and comfort her. It wasn’t going to help. His breathing followed hers, taking a deep breath in with her. He felt the last two months had been great, and the relation between them had only bloomed, even though he was still somewhat hesitant about showing her off to the world. He wished he could do it, but it was just the last bit of hatred that he had in his heart towards witches that he had to detach from her. He knew she wasn’t a witch and nothing like those he had met in his long life.
The thought of her having been pregnant and clearly aborted over the night was heavy for him to know, since he hadn’t known a thing, nor if it was his own or if she had been raped. He knew that his own actions hadn’t been too good from the start, but it had gotten so much better.

Her words broke the silence, making him look towards her with raindrops streaming down his dark skin. It didn’t take long before he replied. “Yes,” – “Do you love me?” he returned the question with the voice which was made of milk and dark honey.

Even though he confessed his feelings towards her, it didn’t seem like se believed it or wanted to. He frowned a little as she whispered back. “What?” he said softly with a slight frown. His eyes shortly looked down thoughtfully. He hadn’t forgotten her… She just wasn’t on his mind… and… Eighteen hours. He looked back up at her and could feel how she was hurt. She had even counted the hours. He felt so stupid. He couldn’t even say that eight of the hours were sleep, because that still left him with ten hours. Did she really want him to think of her all the time?

He knitted his brows together as she said he wouldn’t be there for her. “I came as fast as I could, Danica,” he sneered. “As soon as I heard your voicemail, I went to pick you up. Remember how I even left the door open because I was in a hurry go get to you?” he continued. “I love and care for you,” he said with a way softer voice, and you could almost hear a hint of pain in his sentence. “Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?” he wondered feeling slightly exhausted. He had just been talking with Julianne the day before about how they agreed on her not having the baby, because he was with Danica. He wanted a family with her.

She took a step back as he sneered at her, telling her that he had come as fast as he had could. It was hard to care, of what he had done when she had felt so alone. Maybe it should count that they came, but not when it was too late.
Once again, she felt how hot tears started gliding down her cheeks. She had her traumas, she knew that. She also knew that most of them wasn’t fair for her to project onto him. How she had been left at the altar. How she had lost a baby once before, and how the father hadn’t cared back then. Maybe it was harder because she had once had the perfect relationship. She had been married, raised kids with that man. And she had left him, because she had been cursed with the feeling of something was missing, even though Clay had given her the world.

The day she had left him, was when she had created her own personal hell. Drinking, drugs, the wrong abusive man. So, was it so weird she didn’t trust it anymore? When looking at how their relationship had started. How he had taken her, knowing the consequences of his choice.

Why didn’t tell me you were pregnant

She looked up into his eyes, hugging her arms closer around her body. “I was afraid” she whispered feeling how coldness grabbed her stomach and her brows pressed together in a painful experience. “because I know you still struggle with the fact that I’m part witch – and sometimes, I don’t know if you’ll ever be able to accept that part, so how would you react if a witch was carrying your child, I just, I needed courage to tell you, because I was so happy when I found out, and I couldn’t bare if you weren’t too”

The anger in Diego’s expression left him immediately as she mentioned she was afraid. Was she afraid of him? He wanted to argue that she didn’t have to be afraid, but on the other hand everything had been quite rocky, and he understood why she had held back. He wanted to get closer and wrap his big arms around her and reassure her that she shouldn’t be afraid to carry his child and that he would do anything he could to help her get through it as easy as possible. But the way she elaborated her reason not to tell him, lead him to the fact that she didn’t want his comfort right now. He shook his head a little in denial. He didn’t feel like he struggled with the fact that she was part witch, but maybe it was a picture which was clearer from the outside.

So, how would you react if a witch was carrying your child?

The question was difficult, because no witch would be carrying his child. She wasn’t a full breed witch and it made a difference. He had learned that. He took a deeper breath in and let his gaze fall to the ground as it seemed like she was done. He had to swallow the information for a moment before he looked back up at her. “I would be happy if I knew you were carrying my child,” he said and tried to pull on a smile, even though everything hurt. “I would love to have a family with you,” he confessed, “Please promise me that you’ll tell me another time,” he asked with an almost begging expression on his face.

His silence was hard. He had been so quick to tell her that he loved her but had to think about how he would have felt if she had told him he was pregnant. If she had told him that they were going to have a kid together. Her eyelids felt so heavy from the crying, and because she hadn’t slept all night. He would be happy? Her eyes found his, even as they stood further apart, and the rain didn’t really seem to stop anytime soon. Another time. It was so hard for her to accept that he meant it. She wanted nothing more than his words to be true, but there were all these voices whispering in her head that they weren’t. That he would eventually turn it around and not want her anymore. That had been what had happened last time. So, why would this be any different? How many times hadn’t he already hurt her, what would stop him from doing it again. And she wasn’t sure she would be able to survive another heartbreak.

“Maybe there shouldn’t be another time” she chocked but didn’t pull away her eyes from his, “We could just take this as a sign, and stop pretending this will ever work” every word hurt her, it was clear that she didn’t want to say them. In reality she wanted nothing more than for him to walk over and wrap his arms around her. Tell her to shut up, as he had done so many times before. Kiss her on her lips, making her believe for a while that everything would be alright.
“This is me” she unlocked her arms and waved them down her body “I’m broken, used and I’m so much work” now that she finally opened up, she couldn’t stop herself “I’ve been battling to get clean just after I found out you had a kid, and even though I try to do everything right, I still lost another one” the last words came out as a loud sob, and she broke. Completely utterly broke. Her body bended as she placed her arms around her stomach where there should have been something, but there wasn’t anymore. Yet again, the world had meant she wasn’t fit for being a mother again. Broken seemed like the best word to describe her.

Her words shook him. He understood that she felt awful that they had lost the baby, but he hated that she felt it was a sign that they would never work. “Stop,” he said quietly, hoping it would stop her from speaking this nonsense.
She gestured all of herself and started to point out what she believed was wrong with her. Broken. Used and a whole lot of work. “Stop that,” he said and furrowed his brows. What was she trying to achieve with this? Pity? She wasn’t getting anywhere with that, because he loved her for who she was, even if it was the words, she described herself with. He wanted that. He wanted all of her and all of her imperfections.
She was devasted, there was no doubt in that. It was only underlined when she mentioned she had lost another child. He was certain that the first one would’ve been before him, and therefore it was a story for another day. The way she leaned forward, clenching around her tummy, sobbing made him throw away the idea of her just wanting space.
Quickly he approached her, and if she tried to push him away he would just grab her arms and fight his way close to her so he could wrap his arms around her in a tight embrace, with one hand on top of her head. “Danica,” he hushed and kissed her hair. “I believe in us,” he whispered and cradled her a little. “I believe in you. You’re strong, Danica,” he whispered. He wouldn’t want to let go of her, even if she ended up screaming, yelling or crying.

“Papa?” the little boy had found his way to the door which led to the garden. As soon as the boy saw how his dad held around Danica he didn’t hesitate with running out in the rain and directly into the hugging people to join in and hug their legs. “Rey y reina,” the boy said quite happily.

She felt his present as he came closer, but even though she wanted him to take her in his arms. Her first response was trying to push him away, she had no idea why she couldn’t handle the idea of him actually wanting her. But it hurt, so damn much. This time he didn’t stop, she felt how he tried to push away her arms that tried to hit him, until he finally disarmed her and pulled her close. She leaned her head towards his chest, breathing out, taking in the closeness. Her arms hang down her sides, almost numb while he spoke to her with his beautiful dark soothing voice. Her eyes closed she let the tears run their course down her cheeks. The words that had been burning in her throat, but she couldn’t get herself to say, because she was so scared that she loved to fast too hard. But before she could finally tell him that she loved him too, a familiar voice drew her attention towards the door were Derek stood looking at them.

A small laugh left her, as she felt how small arms locked around their legs. Danica quickly dried of her tears, even if she was heartbroken then she wasn’t going to let it pass on to a small child that couldn’t possibly understand what was going on. She would never have done it to her own kids, so she wouldn’t do it Derek either.

“Always the charmer Derek, guess you get that from your mother” she said with a cheerful and teasing voice, even though it hurt smiling right now. She pulled herself out of the embrace of Diego to crouch down to pick the little boy up in her arms. “Come, there is no need for you to get wet too” she said only to be paid back that she was so wet that he was getting wet by just being in her arms. “Better do something about it then” she felt how the small arms locked around her neck and his head placed on her shoulder. It took all Danica’s willpower not to start crying again.


Danica came out of the shower, toweling her hair her eyes quickly glided towards Diego. Slowly she walked over and took his hand giving it a small squeeze to gain his attention. “I love you too” she whispered, letting her eyes finds his. “I love you so much, that it scares me” she breathed out before letting her hand go of his, placing it towards his cheek and then behind the nape of his head and neck and pulled him into a kiss.

A smile couldn’t be taken away from Diego’s lips as his son called them king and queen in Spanish. Or, that was what he thought. Danica was clearly thinking that Derek had gotten the Spanish words from their mother. What she didn’t know, was how Diego had always called himself the king of the house and as soon as Danica had met Derek, he had started to talk about Danica as being the Queen who needed to be respected and cared for. After all, Diego was one big teddy bear to the people he held dearest. Diego let Danica go as it seemed like she had collected herself a bit and wanted to take care of Derek. It was incredible what kids could do to people who were hurting. The smile which had been taken away before only reapplied itself as he saw how Danica lifted his son up in her arms. He loved the sight more than he had thought.


Diego had just changed clothing and dried his scalp a little. That was all he needed. A bath hadn’t been needed yet. While Danica was in the shower, he had collected a couple of blankets and thrown them in the dryer to make them warm for her. Downstairs Derek kept an eye on the electric kettle, having the assignment to tell whenever the water was done.
Diego stood and folded some of Danica’s clothing. He wasn’t an expert, but it was somewhat squared – if you closed one eye and turned around. He was just about to take a new piece of clothing from the clean laundry basket as he felt Danica’s hand on his. He left the task to look at her. He smiled warmly at her as she said she loved him. The smile faded a bit as she elaborated that it scared her. “I’m sorry,” he breathed out as he felt her hand on his cheek. He didn’t resist being pulled down into a kiss but turned all the way to face her and wrap his arms around her carefully. He parted their lips and let his forehead rest against hers, “Is there anything I can do?” he spoke softly. He didn’t want her to be scared of the love she felt. He wanted her to appreciate it and allow it to grow – overflow even.